"I see no enemy to a fortunate issue but in the brow; and that brow

professes to say,--'I can live alone, if self-respect, and

circumstances require me so to do. I need not sell my soul to buy

bliss. I have an inward treasure born with me, which can keep me

alive if all extraneous delights should be withheld, or offered only

at a price I cannot afford to give.' The forehead declares, 'Reason

sits firm and holds the reins, and she will not let the feelings

burst away and hurry her to wild chasms. The passions may rage

furiously, like true heathens, as they are; and the desires may

imagine all sorts of vain things: but judgment shall still have the

last word in every argument, and the casting vote in every decision.

Strong wind, earthquake-shock, and fire may pass by: but I shall

follow the guiding of that still small voice which interprets the

dictates of conscience.' "Well said, forehead; your declaration shall be respected. I have

formed my plans--right plans I deem them--and in them I have

attended to the claims of conscience, the counsels of reason. I

know how soon youth would fade and bloom perish, if, in the cup of

bliss offered, but one dreg of shame, or one flavour of remorse were

detected; and I do not want sacrifice, sorrow, dissolution--such is

not my taste. I wish to foster, not to blight--to earn gratitude,

not to wring tears of blood--no, nor of brine: my harvest must be

in smiles, in endearments, in sweet-- That will do. I think I rave

in a kind of exquisite delirium. I should wish now to protract this

moment ad infinitum; but I dare not. So far I have governed myself

thoroughly. I have acted as I inwardly swore I would act; but

further might try me beyond my strength. Rise, Miss Eyre: leave

me; the play is played out'."

Where was I? Did I wake or sleep? Had I been dreaming? Did I

dream still? The old woman's voice had changed: her accent, her

gesture, and all were familiar to me as my own face in a glass--as

the speech of my own tongue. I got up, but did not go. I looked; I

stirred the fire, and I looked again: but she drew her bonnet and

her bandage closer about her face, and again beckoned me to depart.

The flame illuminated her hand stretched out: roused now, and on

the alert for discoveries, I at once noticed that hand. It was no

more the withered limb of eld than my own; it was a rounded supple

member, with smooth fingers, symmetrically turned; a broad ring

flashed on the little finger, and stooping forward, I looked at it,

and saw a gem I had seen a hundred times before. Again I looked at

the face; which was no longer turned from me--on the contrary, the

bonnet was doffed, the bandage displaced, the head advanced.




readonlinefreebook.com Copyright 2016 - 2024