We all turn to Jax, who looks around in surprise. “What? Why are you all looking at me?”
“Let’s talk about blow jobs,” Stacy says, batting her eyelashes. “Like, technique.”
“I’m not drunk enough for this.”
“Yes, you are,” Alecia says with a laugh. “Come on, share some secrets.”
“I don’t want to lose my man card.”
“You’re sharing secrets that benefit men,” I point out logically. “Obviously you can’t lose your man card for that.”
“I’ll start,” Nic says, clearing her throat. “I read a book where the woman went down on him, and when he’s way in the back of her throat, she swallows, and that’s supposed to massage the dick and be really great for him.”
“I can see that,” Jax says with a nod.
“But how?” Amelia demands. “I mean, doesn’t she have a gag reflex? I don’t mean to brag, but Wyatt isn’t a small man.”
“Same,” several of us agree loudly.
“So,” Amelia continues, “how in the world am I supposed to not only shove it to the back of my throat, but then also swallow around it and not throw up?”
“These are excellent questions,” Brynna says, turning to Jax. “What do you think?”
“I think I should go home,” he says, his cheeks turning red.
“No,” Mer says, holding him in place, then pinching his mouth until he has duck lips. “Tell us the blow job secrets.”
“Just suck it,” he finally says. “Seriously, suck it, lick it, kiss it, stroke it. In any order. Any attention given to the dick is appreciated and will make him happy.”
“But there has to be more to it than that,” Sam says, disappointment written all over her face.
“Not really,” Jax says with a shrug. “Guys are pretty simple.”
“So you’re saying that I should just give him the blow job, even if I don’t think I’m all that good at it,” Brynna says.
“Well, yeah. He comes when you do it, doesn’t he?” Jax asks.
“Of course he does,” Brynna replies.
“Well, there you go. He enjoys it. He wouldn’t come if he didn’t.”
“Good point,” Jules says, raising her glass. She reaches for her phone. “I’d better text Nate and let him know that I’ve learned all the blow job secrets.”
“His is different,” I remind her. “He’s pierced.”
“I don’t know anything about that,” Jax replies, holding his hands up in surrender. “I’ve never done that before.”
“He still has a regular dick,” Jules points out. “It’s amazing, but it’s a normal dick.”
“But don’t you have to be careful of the metal?” I ask, confused. “I’d be afraid that I was going to pull on it and hurt him or something.”
“No,” she replies, thinking about it. “He’s never said that I’ve hurt him before. Shit, now I have to think about this. I’ll text him.”
She starts to type away on her phone.
“Nat, how do you spell dick?”
“Why does she always forget how to spell when she’s drunk?” Meg asks with a laugh.
“Don’t judge me, Judgy McJudgerson,” Jules says with a scowl, staring at her phone. “How do you spell apa?”
“Jesus,” Jax mutters, pulling his hand down his face. “I love you girls. You’re a riot to hang out with.”
“Damn right we are,” I reply with a wink and glance over Jules’s shoulder to see what she’s typing.
“Who’s Nick, and why are you texting him about sucking on his dick?”
“I’m texting Nate,” Jules says.
“No, it says Nick at the top.” I point to it, and she snorts.
“Fuck, good catch. Nate would have been really pissed if I’d sent that message to the business contact in New York.”
“Oh, God,” I mutter. “You should be banned from your phone when you’re drunk.”
“It’s good now. See?”
She holds the screen up to me, and I see Nancy at the top of the screen.
“That’s not Nate,” I reply, covering my mouth to laugh behind my hand. “Oh, God, this is funny.”
“Shit,” Jules mutters, and holds it up again. “Now?”
“Now,” Meg confirms. “But it says slit your dick rather than suck your dick.”
“So?”
“Huge difference,” Jax says with a laugh. “Enormous difference.”
“Fucking autocorrect,” Jules mutters as she corrects the mistake, concentrating harder than I’ve ever seen her before. “There. Whew, that was hard.”
“Ask him for a dick pic,” Sam says. “I want to see an apa.”
“No way,” I burst out with giggles. “No one wants to see that.”
“I’m curious,” Anastasia admits. “But he’s her husband so, no. Not smart.”
“We could Google it,” Amelia suggests. “Then it’s just a random dude’s pierced…” she flails her hands about. “thing.”
“Thing?” Meg repeats. “It’s a cock.”
“Exactly.”
“Okay, I’ll Google it,” I offer, pulling my phone out of my pocket. When the images come up, I scowl. “Holy fuck, that has to hurt.”
“I want to see!”
I pass my phone around the room. When it reaches Sam, she cocks her head to the side, examining it the way a scientist examines something in a petrie dish.
“Huh,” she says. “It’s not what I expected.”
“It’s not the Prince Albert,” Jules says, shaking her head. “It’s different.”
“Yeah, I see that now,” Sam says, pinching her fingers in and out to zoom in. “How long has he had it?”
“Years. More than ten.”
“Wow.”
“I’m going to text him and tell him you’re all impressed by his cock.”
“No,” I say, pulling her phone out of her hand. “You’ll misspell everything, and it’s best if he doesn’t know that we Googled it. Some things have to stay in the cone of silence.”
“Fine,” she says with a sigh. “Cone of silence on this one.”
“Speaking of the cone of silence,” Stacy says with a naughty smile. “I have to tell you something.”
“If it’s about sex with my brother, I’m not sure I want to know,” Jules says, wrinkling her nose, but I wave her off and lean in.
“Tell us everything,” I say.
“Well, you know Isaac and I have been married for over a decade, and sometimes you just have to spice things up, you know?”
“Carry on,” Anastasia says. We’re all fascinated to hear what she’s going to say next.
Stacy takes a sip of her cham-pom. “Well, I’ve started dressing up in costumes.”
“Like, a school girl?” I ask.
“That’s one,” she confirms. “I also have a naughty nurse, a belly dancer, a sea wench.”
“A sea wench!” Sam exclaims, giggling. “Oh, that’s awesome.”
“It’s fun,” Stacy insists, laughing with us. “And I know it may sound silly, but it really does bring something fun and new to our sex life. He especially enjoys the belly dancer.”
“I’m sure he does,” I reply, giggling. “I’m going to have to try it. I bet Luke would be into it, having been an actor and all.”
“Oh my God, you’re totally right,” Amelia says with a laugh. “Maybe I should try it. I have all the makeup in the world and I’m sure I have some outfits that would do the trick.”
“All of our men are going to be stunned this week by our sea wenches and naughty nurses,” I say, then turn to Jax. “What do you think you’ll dress up as?”
“A sexy as fuck man,” he says smugly. “That’s all my man needs.”