As I approach, I start to tingle all over. I have a dreadful feeling I might suddenly giggle. This is so ridiculous. Spying on someone I’ve never met. I clutch my folders more tightly and edge forward a little more.
There are two other women in the office with her, and they’re all drinking tea, and Willow is talking.
Damn. She doesn’t have a whiny, nasal voice. In fact, it’s quite melodious and sane-sounding—except when you start listening to what she’s saying.
“Of course this is all to get back at me,” she’s saying. “This whole exercise is one big Fuck You, Willow. You know it was actually my idea?”
“No!” says one of the girls. “Really?”
“Oh yes.” She turns her head briefly and I catch sight of a sorrowful, pitying smile. “New-idea generation is my thing. Sam ripped me off. I was planning to send out exactly the same email. Same words, everything. He probably saw it on my laptop one night.”
I’m listening, completely stunned. Is she talking about my email? I want to burst in and say, “He couldn’t have ripped you off; he didn’t even send it!”
“That’s the kind of move he pulls all the time,” she adds, and takes a sip of tea. “That’s how he’s made his career. No integrity.”
OK, I’m completely fogged now. Either I’m all wrong about Sam or she’s all wrong about him, because in my opinion he’s the last person in the world you could imagine ripping somebody else off.
“I just don’t know why he has to compete with me,” Willow’s saying. “What is that with men? What’s wrong with facing the world together? Side by side? What’s wrong with being a partnership? Or is that too … generous for him to get his stupid male head round?”
“He wants control,” says of one the other girls, cracking a chocolate biscuit in half. “They all do. He’s never going to give you the credit you deserve in a million years.”
“But can’t he see how perfect it would be if we could get it fucking right ? If we could get beyond this crappy bad patch?” Willow sounds impassioned. “Working together, being together … the whole package … it could be sublime.” She breaks off and takes a gulp of tea. “The question is, how long do I give him? Because I can’t go on like this much longer.”
“Have you talked it through?” says the third girl.
“Please! You know Sam and ‘talking.’ ” She makes quote marks with her fingers.
Well. I’m with her there.
“It makes me sad.” She shakes her head. “Not for me, for him. He can’t see what’s in front of his face and he doesn’t know how to value what he has, and, you know what? He’s going to lose it. And then he’s going to want it, but it’ll be too late. Too late.” She bangs her teacup down. “Gone.”
I’m suddenly gripped. I’m seeing this conversation in a new light. I’m realizing that Willow has more insight than I gave her credit for. Because, if truth be told, this is just what I feel about Sam and his father. Sam can’t see what he’s losing, and when he does it may be too late. OK, I know I don’t know the whole story between them. But I’ve seen the emails, I’ve got the idea—
My thoughts stop abruptly in their tracks. Alarm bells have started to ring in my head. First distant, but now getting loud and clangy. Oh no, oh no, oh God.
Sam’s father. April 24. That’s today. I’d completely forgotten. How could I be so stupid ?
Horror is rising up in me like chill water. Sam’s dad’s going to pitch up at the Chiddingford Hotel, expecting some lovely reunion. Today. He’s probably on his way already. He’ll be all excited. And Sam won’t even be there. He’s not going to the conference until tomorrow.
Shiiiiit. I’ve really messed up. I’d forgotten all about it, what with all the other emergencies going on.
What do I do? How do I solve this? I can’t tell Sam. He’ll go absolutely mad. And he’s so stressed anyway. Do I cancel the dad? Send a quick rain-check apology email? Or will that make everything even worse between them?
There’s only one tiny ray of hope. Sam’s dad never sent any reply, which is why I forgot about it. So maybe he never even got the email. Maybe it’s all OK—
I suddenly realize I’m nodding emphatically, as though to persuade myself. One of the girls with Willow looks up and eyes me curiously. Oops.
“Right!” I say out loud. “So … I’ll just … Good. Yes.” I hastily turn on my heel. If there’s one thing I don’t want, it’s being busted by Willow. I scurry to the safety of Sam’s office and am about to grab the phone to email Sam’s dad, when I see Sam and Vicks marching back toward the office, apparently in the middle of a blazing argument. They look a bit terrifying, and I find myself backing hastily into the bathroom.