“You think I want anyone else when I got this?” I asked, leaning forward and pressing my mouth there, lightly kissing her as I spoke. “You think I’m even lookin’ anywhere else? Fuck, babe. If it ain’t you, I’m blind. You gotta know that.” I bent lower and started licking her.
Tori gasped, “Jamie,” then her moans started coming, low and raw in her throat.
“Night of that party, I didn’t know what I had when you showed up,” I admitted against her flesh. “I didn’t know what you were givin’ me. Might sound harsh, Legs, but it is what it is. Lookin’ to fuck that night. You showed and I thought maybe you were down, and then you disappeared and I figured you changed your mind. We weren’t anythin’ to each other then, babe. I don’t gotta apologize for hooking up when I didn’t think I had you.”
Her nails dug into my scalp. I sucked on her clit and she relaxed, breath catching and then moving heavy again as she tugged me closer.
I kept sucking, buried my nose there and then licked her lower where she was growing wettest.
“I don’t gotta apologize for that,” I repeated, hooking my arm around her thigh and using my fingers to hold her open, then lifting my head to look at her.
Tears were streaming down her face. Her chest was shaking.
“But what I am gonna apologize for is for you seein’ it,” I continued, keeping her eyes. “Knowin’ now what you just shared, hearin’ you were waitin’ for me, that’s messin’ me up, babe. And that’s somethin’ I’m gonna feel for a while. Straight up. I wanted you for more than just a fuck, Tori. I always did.”
She shook her head. Fresh tears building, from what I just confessed or for the pain she was feeling reliving that night, I wasn’t sure.
I leaned in and swiped my tongue through her pussy, watching her head drop back and her lips part as she tugged on my hair, whimpering, “Please,” like this was killing her or like it would if I stopped.
For seconds I ate her slowly, just concentrating on that and the feel of her muscles tensing against my head and under my hand as I pressed against her stomach. I was kissing her like I kissed her mouth after we fucked, desperately, like I was asking if I could have this and can I keep you? and do you feel this, too?
Going down on a woman had never felt so intense. It had never felt like much of anything, just a prelude to sex and sometimes the path to get us there more quickly, but that wasn’t what this was. I wasn’t even thinking about getting off.
I was on my knees for someone I would stay there for. If she asked or if she couldn’t, it didn’t matter. I knew that.
And that’s when it happened.
I stopped asking. There was no question. It was this is mine and I know you feel this and I’m never letting you go. I became rough and wild. I took her there, to the very edge where she was shaking and begging and so close to coming I barely had to touch her, then I leaned away and looked up, breathing heavy against her pussy because I was panting, too.
“Smilin’ at them ’cause they were offerin’ another go and I wasn’t feelin’ it. Not even a little,” I shared, watching her lips part. “I sat there knowin’ I belonged to you and I was fuckin’ happy knowin’ that. Only thing that would’ve made that moment better is if you were claimin’ me, babe. Too bad you couldn’t do that.”
Tori’s breath was hitching in little gasps as she stared, listening, those tears still flowing down her cheeks, possibly from what I was admitting or from regretting the opportunity she had and didn’t take, or maybe she was just so far gone and suspended there she was breaking down, I wasn’t sure.
I wasn’t asking.
I leaned in and watched her eyes roll closed and her neck arch, head dropping back and hitting the lockers.
I latched on to her clit and sucked it hard.
Her leg on my shoulder tensed, her body pressed down against my mouth, hips grinding, fingers pulling my hair, and moans escaping her sweetly.
I closed my eyes as her taste flooded my mouth. Hands gripping her hips and urging her to keep moving, then feeling her come down, her body melting and softening against me and her fingers in my hair moving slowly, not gripping.
I looked up, meeting eyes that were heavy-lidded. Her face was flushed and her hair was sticking to her cheeks, which were wet from her tears. I pressed my mouth to her thigh and lowered her leg from my shoulder, then I stood, leaning in and looming over her, arm bracing on the locker above her head and other hand pushing the hair from her face, tucking it behind her ear and then gripping her neck.
“I hate that you saw me with them,” I said, bending down and getting even closer. “Hate that I had you in my old room, probably sittin’ on my old bed, touchin’ my shit, lookin’ at stuff that means somethin’ to me and I wasn’t there watchin’ you do that. Fact that I missed out on that fuckin’ sucks. Fact that you saw me with them is gonna eat at me, babe. Straight up. But ain’t nothin’ I can do to change that. Ain’t nothin’ you can do to change it either. I fucked up by not lookin’ for you longer than I did. But you”—my fingers on her neck squeezed—“you fucked up, too, Legs.”
She blinked. Her breath hitched. “I—”
“You wanna act like a jealous girlfriend, then you can fuckin’ admit that’s what you are to me,” I interrupted, watching her trembling lips press together. “Claim me, babe, otherwise you got no reason to be throwin’ attitude and tellin’ me to leave. I didn’t do shit, and you thinkin’ I did and not trustin’ I’m with you, even though you ain’t admittin’ that’s where you want me to be is fucked up. Same as gettin’ mad at me for shit we both let happen. I’ll feel that, babe, but you’re feelin’ it, too.”