“Asshole,” Dane curses under his breath. “I better get back to work, baby. I’ll see you when I get home.”
“Okay, see you later.”
“Be careful. I want you in one piece under my sheets when I get home,” he says, quickly brushing his lips over mine. I finish my water and walk out of the bar a huge smile on my face. I’m employed, and I still get to spend my evenings with Dane.
The sun is just starting to set as I step outside. The suits and briefcases have disappeared, replaced by casually dressed people ready for a night on the town. Horns honk almost constantly as cars try to weave in and out of traffic and a mixture of music fills the otherwise quiet night. I love the city sounds, but after our trip to the country last week I realize I enjoy some calm and quiet too. Maybe we can take a weekend trip to the city sometime soon, I think as I approach our apartment building. But then I remember who we are, we’re broke college students who work in a bar. I think back to all the trips I took with my parents and realize I would rather live every day with Dane in our small, cramped apartment in the city than travel the world.
By the time I reach the apartment, my clothes are clinging to my body from the warm, humid summer air. I jump in the shower quick and throw on some cotton shorts and a camisole top before sitting on the couch with a tub of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream. It would be nice if Dane could join the party too, but someone has to pay the rent.
I turn on Pretty Woman, and I’m three bites into my ice cream when my phone starts to ring. I’m tempted to let it go to voicemail, but then I think of Jade and how many times I call her for random things late at night.
“Hello,” I say, setting my ice cream on the coffee table.
“Hi, Alex. I hope it’s not too late, but I’ve been working late at the hospital, and this seems to be the only time I can call anyone.” Gwen. I haven’t seen her since the art show, but we talk at least once a week. She doesn’t mention my parents, and I don’t ask about them. I’m sure they don’t ask about me, either.
“Hey, how are you?” I ask, curling myself up in the corner of the couch.
“I’m okay, I guess.” I can hear her voice trembling. Something is wrong.
I sit up straight. “Hey, what’s the matter?” I ask, pulling the receiver closer to my ear.
“I think Phillip’s cheating on me,” she cries into the phone. My heart breaks for her. They’ve only been married for a few months and her fairy tale is already crumbling. I think she went into it expecting the perfect life. Instead, they’re just two people who are trying to live the perfect life, but don’t feel connected to each other. Expectations can’t bind two people together forever.
If I had to guess, I’d say Phillip was cheating before they got married. It’s what men in his family do. His mom has put up with it for years, but I don’t think Gwen is looking to fall into those footsteps. I know she’s stronger than that.
“What makes you think that?” I ask.
“I was getting ready to go to dinner with him after work tonight, and when I walked into the bedroom he was whispering into his phone. The moment he saw me, he ended the call and placed his phone into his pocket. He’s up to something, Alex, I know it,” she wails. I wish I could comfort her and tell her that she misunderstood, but I think she’s probably right.
“What are you going to do?” I ask, biting my nail.
“I don’t know. We’re married, I can’t just walk out,” she says, sounding like she’s trying to convince herself more than me. I hate that she feels obligated to stay in an unhealthy marriage.
“You deserve more,” I say softly into the phone.
“I know,” she whispers.
I think back to earlier at the bar and wonder if she knows Reid Murphy. They’re close in age so if our families know each other, Gwen would know. “Hey, do you now anyone with the last name Murphy?” I ask. The other end of the phone is dead silent as I wait for her to say something. “Gwen?”
“I’m sorry, Murphy is a common name. W-what’s the first name?” she stutters.
“My new boss, his name is Reid. He seemed to know our family somehow,” I say, biting my lip.
I hear her crying on the other end of the phone again. “I have to go. I’ll talk to you later,” she says, hanging up on me. I need to find out what this is all about, but I know her well enough to know she won’t pick up the phone if I try to call her. She’s probably got her head buried in a pillow, trying to avoid that husband of hers.
I’ve always had this feeling that Gwen has experienced true love and knows what it feels like. Maybe she does. Maybe someday she will find it again.
Chapter Ten
“Alex, are you ready to go?” I yell toward the bedroom. She’s been in there getting ready for almost an hour and we need to be leaving soon, or we’ll both be late. Having her start at the bar tonight has me on edge, and she’s been fidgety all day, asking me tons of questions about my co-workers and how she should wear her hair. I’m a guy and could care less how she does her hair. I keep telling her to just throw it up in a ponytail, but she’s determined to look her best for her first day. She doesn’t realize how beautiful she is without all that crap in her hair and on her face. And I swear to God, if David even thinks about giving her one of the way too tight t-shirts he likes to give all the waitresses, I’ll ring his chubby neck. I called him out on it one time, and he gave me this whole rundown about how they make more tips that way. Bullshit. They can bat their eyes and have the same result.
“Will you quit yelling at me? It doesn’t make me get ready any faster,” she says, storming out of the bedroom. Her hair is perfectly curled, falling down the middle of her back, and she has way too much goddamn makeup on. I open my mouth to tell her to go wash some of it off before all the college age assholes get the wrong idea, but stop, reminding myself that I’ll be there with her the whole time.
“I don’t want you to be late for your first day,” I say, grabbing her hand and pulling her out the door with me. It’s almost June and the air is warm and humid…the kind of night I want to jump on my bike and ride until the sun goes down. “It would be a great night to take the bike out. Actually, I’ve always wanted to pack a bag and just ride for a few days. No plans and no purpose other than to relax and let go.”
She glances sideways in my direction, showing me her perfect teeth. “I’ve never done anything like that before. It sounds really nice actually.”
“We might have to sleep outside…in a tent,” I add, smiling down at her.
She laughs. “That will also be a first for me. I always wanted to go camping as a kid and sleep under the stars, but it never happened. My parents never stayed in anything that was rated less than five stars. I don’t think a tent even qualifies as one star.”
“When Jenna was still alive, and everything was normal, my dad used to set up a tent in the back yard. We’d throw some wood in the fire pit and roast hot dogs and marshmallows.” I stop, smiling at the memory. “My dad would lay out our sleeping bags side by side and open the top of the tent so we could glare at the sky. He told us stories as we gazed up at the stars until we finally fell asleep.”
My life wasn’t always hard. I’ve never been able to decide if it was better that I lived the good life and at least knew what life could be like, or if knowing the good just made the bad times even worse. I like to use the good memories to bring me back to Jenna, to remind me what I want my life to be like now that I have total control of it, and to reinforce every day how I got to where I am now.
“Dane,” Alex says, shaking my arm. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah, I was just thinking,” I shrug. It’s amazing how one little thought can blow the past open.
“I think I lost you there for a minute,” she says, gently wrapping her hand around my arm. She’ll never lose me, but that doesn’t mean my mind doesn’t take a vacation every now and then.
“I’m fine. Things just randomly pop up in my head sometimes, you know?”
“Yeah, I get it. I talked to Gwen last night and it reminded me of my parents. They still haven’t tried to contact me and it bothers me a little. I guess I thought I was making a stand and they would change for me, but I don’t think that’s going to happen.”
“I’m sorry, baby,” I say, bringing her hand to my mouth. I know exactly what she means. I hoped for years that my mom would change. I took care of my brother, and waited for her to get better and take care of us for a change, but it didn’t happen. Not until it was too late for Nolan and me.
We walk the rest of the way to work without muttering a word to each other. As soon as we walk through the door, I notice the bouncer’s eyes on Alex and dread washes over me. I want to glue her to my side for the evening, but I don’t think David would approve. I used to get into fights on a regular basis, but I’ve mellowed out a lot since I’ve been clean. Without the chemicals in my body, I can talk myself down and control my temper, but that doesn’t mean it can’t boil to the top sometimes...especially when I see other guys drinking in my girl’s insanely hot body.
I place my hand on the small of her back and lead her to David’s office to claim her official Loft 10 t-shirt. She’s an adult and could go by herself, but I need to make sure he gives her the right size. I’m not going to let him play his games with my girl.
She’s rubbing her hands together so furiously that I think she could ignite a fire. It’s cute, but she needs to calm down. “Hey, look at me,” I say, gently grabbing her chin between my fingers. “You’re going to be fine. I’ll be here for you if you need anything.”
I watch her close her eyes and take a deep breath. “I know. I have no freaking clue what I’m doing, though.”
“That’s what training is for,” I say, quickly brushing her lips with mine.