Connor's eyes had glazed over halfway through Maggie's story. "I see."
"The old amnesia/secret baby story," Vanda said wryly. "Happens all the time."
Maggie gave her an annoyed look and stuffed the photos back into her evening bag. "It happened to me, and we couldn't be happier."
"Then I'm verra happy for you." Connor turned to Vanda. "I'll need to check yer bag, too."
"I thought you'd never ask." Vanda tossed her bag onto the table. She was ready for him this time.
He opened her silver evening bag. His eyes widened.
She was quite proud that she'd managed to squeeze a pair of handcuffs, a blindfold, her back massager, and a bottle of Viagra into such a tiny handbag. She smiled sweetly. "Something wrong, Connor?"
"I see ye came prepared." He gave her a wry look as he returned her bag. "Enjoy yer evening."
"I will." Vanda strode toward the banquet hall.
Maggie sidled up to her and whispered, "What's in your bag?"
Vanda handed it to her with a smile.
Maggie opened it and laughed. "Girl, I have missed you." She passed the bag back with a sly look. "You must be planning to have sex with someone. I wonder who that could possibly be?"
"It was a joke, Maggie. Don't read anything more into it." Vanda entered the banquet hall.
The High Voltage Vamps were on the dais, playing "That's Amore." Couples were on the dance floor, happily swaying to the music. Vanda groaned.
A line had formed to congratulate Jack and meet his fiancée Lara.
"Oh, she's pretty," Maggie observed. "And she looks so happy. Come on, let's get in line."
Vanda surveyed the room as they strolled to the end of the queue. No sign of Phil. She grabbed a flute off the tray of a passing waiter. It was filled with Bubbly Blood, a mixture of champagne and synthetic blood. She downed it in three gulps.
Maggie frowned at her. "Are you all right?"
"Sure." She exchanged her empty glass for a full one from another waiter. "I'm just hungry."
"I think you're nervous."
"Why does everyone want to psychoanalyze me?"
"I don't know. Maybe it has something to do with the seven lawsuits filed against you in the last year," Maggie muttered with a sarcastic tone. "That could be a sign that you don't handle relationships well."
"I would be fine if everyone would just leave me the hell alone."
Maggie sighed. "You have friends, Vanda. Whether you like it or not, there are people who care about you."
Vanda's eyes burned as tears threatened. "Don't be nice to me. I can't...handle it." She gulped down more Bubbly Blood.
Maggie watched her sadly. "Darlin', you can't suffer like this forever. You need help."
Vanda took a deep breath and blinked her tears away. "I'm fine." She was tough, dammit. She started to tighten the whip around her waist, then realized it wasn't there. "Damn, I feel like I'm wearing a nightgown."
"You look beautiful. That silver satin makes your skin look positively luminous, and your eyes are dazzling. Phil looks completely flummoxed."
"What?" Vanda glanced around quickly. "Where is he?"
"He just came in from the patio." Maggie pointed at the glass wall at the back of the banquet hall that overlooked the grounds. "Oh, now he's coming toward us."
Vanda gulped. He looked incredibly handsome in a black tux that hugged his broad shoulders and narrow hips. The blond and red highlights in his hair gleamed, and his beautiful blue eyes were focused on her. "Oh my God."
Maggie smirked. "There goes Cupid's arrow. Bull'seye."
Vanda grabbed Maggie's arm. "Keep him occupied. I've got to go."
"Chicken," Maggie hissed as Vanda hurried away.
She skirted the room, ducking behind groups of Vamps so she couldn't be seen. It wasn't fear. It was panic. Her nerves had been frazzled ever since Phil had come back into her life.
In a far, dark corner, she found a row of chairs that were partially hidden by some large potted plants and a giant ice sculpture on a nearby table. She rolled her eyes. It was a giant Cupid, carved out of ice. Then she noticed the table was laden with mortal food. No wonder this corner was deserted. Most of the guests were Vamps, so they had no interest in mortal food, unless it was walking on two legs.
She finished her Bubbly Blood and set the glass next to a tray of boiled shrimp. A bottle of red liquid caught her eye. At first she thought it was one of Roman's Vampire Fusion inventions, since it was red like blood. She read the label: LOUISIANA HOT SAUCE. Maybe it was here for Jack's fiancée.
She wandered toward the row of chairs, looped her bag on the back of one and took a seat. No sign of Phil. No sign of anyone. She inhaled deeply. She would try to remain calm, even though she was a jumbled mess of contradictions. She ached with loneliness, but here she was in the middle of a party, trying to be alone. She longed to feel Phil's arms around her, yet here she was, hiding from him.
He was just too tempting. She loved the way she felt in his arms. She felt beautiful, desired, cherished. It had been so long since she'd felt special to someone.
Trust me, he had said. She wanted to trust him, but how could she trust love? She'd always told others there was nothing more sacred than love. She believed that with all her heart, but she knew deep down that love was for others, not for her. Love had always failed her, always brought pain and suffering. Do you want to endure life for centuries afraid to love another person? Phil's words still pricked at her.
"Hey, Vanda. How's it going?"
She jerked out of her morose thoughts to see Shanna approaching. "Hi."
The pretty wife of Roman Draganesti was carrying their new baby wrapped in a pink blanket. She swung a diaper bag off her shoulder, dropped it in a chair, then returned to the refreshment table. With the baby cradled in one arm, Shanna used her free hand to load food onto a plate. "I swear I have to breast-feed every hour. It makes me so hungry."
"Yeah." A pang of regret hit Vanda hard. After her mother's death, she had loved mothering her younger siblings. But she could never have children of her own, since as a Vamp her eggs were dead.
"Are you all right?" Shanna gave her a worried look as she added some grapes to her plate.
Vanda gritted her teeth. "I'm great."
"Good. Then if you don't mind..." Shanna hurried over and set the baby in Vanda's arms. "Thank you so much."
Vanda stiffened. "But - "
"It's so hard with two little ones." Shanna rushed back to the table and poured herself some punch. "I gave Radinka the night off 'cause she's so worn-out. And Roman is busy with some official coven stuff." She motioned toward the dance floor. "I left Tino jumping up and down to the music. I hope it wears him out."
She downed the cup of punch, then poured another one. "I need lots of fluids. So, are you enjoying the party?"
"Sure," Vanda mumbled. She lowered her gaze, reluctant to even look at the baby. The infant possessed a surprisingly sturdy little body in a pink dress with pink rosebuds embroidered on the collar. Plump pink cheeks. A pink mouth that opened and shut like a little fish. Big blue eyes.
Vanda swallowed hard. Frieda's eyes had been that same shade of blue. Tinged with a bit of green, so they were almost turquoise. "What - " Her voice croaked, and she cleared her throat. "What's her name?"
"Sofia." Shanna popped a grape in her mouth. "After Roman's mother, who died when he was very young."
Vanda's eyes burned. She'd never be able to honor her mother's memory by naming a child after her. With trembling fingers she brushed the blanket off Sofia's head. Black hair. Just like Jozef. The old wound in her heart cracked further open, and she blinked back tears. She couldn't do this. She had to give the baby back.
She looked at Shanna. "I - "
"She likes you." Shanna smiled. "She usually starts screaming if she doesn't recognize whoever's holding her."
"But..." Vanda glanced down at the baby. How can you like me? I'm dying inside.
Sofia waved a tiny fist in the air and moved her mouth like she was trying to talk.
"There you are, Vanda." Maggie peered around the giant ice sculpture. "I've been looking everywhere for you."
Vanda's heart leaped, then relaxed when she saw that Maggie was alone. She hadn't brought Phil with her. "Where is he?"
"Gee, I wonder whom you're referring to." Maggie circled the table. "Hi, Shanna."
"Maggie, how are you?" Shanna gave her a hug.
"I'm great. And this must be your new baby." Maggie rushed over to Vanda to look at the infant. "Sweet Mary and Joseph, what a beautiful little girl."
"Thank you." Shanna strolled over with her plate of food.
"Where's Phil?" Vanda whispered to Maggie.
"He's on guard duty right now. He said he'd catch up with you later." Maggie's mouth twitched. "I didn't know you were so good with babies."
Vanda gritted her teeth. "I'm not."
Shanna munched on a cracker. "Sofia's taken a real liking to Vanda."
"She's too young to know any better," Vanda muttered.
Shanna chuckled. "Actually, she has very good instincts where people are concerned. She always spits up on Gregori, and Radinka claims it's because she knows he's a womanizing cad."
"I'm so glad I ran into you, Shanna." Maggie removed a photo from her evening bag. "I've been meaning to talk to you about my daughter Lucy. She's seven years old now. And she's mortal, since Pierce fathered her before he was turned."
"I see." Shanna studied the photo. "She's adorable."
"The problem is, Lucy's in school now," Maggie continued. "And it's hard to explain how her parents are never available during the day. And we worry that she might slip up and mention that her parents are vampires and her great-uncle and aunt are shape shifters."
Vanda flinched, and the baby whimpered.
Shanna leaned over to whisper comforting words to her daughter.
"Oh, I'm sorry, Vanda," Maggie said. "I probably gave you a shock. A lot of Vamps don't know about shifters."
Vanda shuddered. "I know about them." Her muscles tensed and a black hole of panic threatened to overwhelm her. She gasped for air.
"Are you all right?" Shanna set her plate on a nearby chair. "Do you need me to take the baby?"
"I - " Vanda's gaze met the baby's blue eyes and she froze. Time slowed down and a soft feeling of peace poured through her, trickling down sweet and golden like honey. The panic attack was gone. "I'm okay."
"Good." With a smile, Shanna handed Lucy's photo back to Maggie. "Your daughter is a perfect candidate for the school we're opening in the fall. We'll have a few mortal children there, children who know too much, like Jean-Luc and Heather's girl Bethany."
"It sounds wonderful." Maggie slipped the photo back into her bag.
"Classes will be in the evening so Vamp parents can teleport their children to school." Shanna retrieved her plate of food, then paused with a piece of cheese halfway to her mouth. "Oh my gosh, I just had a terrific idea. You were an actress on DVN. You could teach a drama class to our older students!"
Maggie's mouth fell open. "Me? Teach?"
"Yes!" Shanna grinned. "You could teleport Lucy to school, then stay to teach a class. What do you think?"
"Well, it sounds more fun than shoveling bat guano every night," Maggie murmured.
"There you go." Shanna gave her an encouraging look. "And your husband would be welcome to teach, too."
Maggie nodded slowly. "We could use the extra money."
"Great! Let's get you a couple of job applications and a registration form for Lucy. I have them in my office." Shanna set her plate of food on the table, then glanced at Vanda. "Can you watch Sofia for a few minutes? Thanks!"
"But - " Vanda watched in dismay as Shanna and Maggie dashed off. "Goddammit." She glanced at the baby. "Pretend you didn't hear that."
The baby gazed up at her, wide-eyed and curious.
Vanda sighed. "I guess you're stuck with me."
Sofia made a slurping noise.
Vanda adjusted her hold and waited. And waited. She touched the baby's cheek. The skin felt so soft and new. The last time she'd held a baby was in 1927, when her brother Jozef was born. She'd always thought of him as her baby. He'd been only twelve when he'd marched off with his father and brothers to fight the Nazi invasion.
Her eyes grew moist. She'd begged him not to go. She'd begged him to flee with her and their sisters. But he'd wanted to prove he wasn't a baby, that he was all grown up.
He was so young to die.
"Hi," a young voice greeted her.
Vanda blinked her eyes dry. A little boy with blond curls and blue eyes stood next to the refreshment table. He was dressed in a little navy blue suit, but his shirttail had fallen out and his tie was askew.
"I'm Tino." He grabbed a cookie off the table and bit into it.
She'd seen Constantine Draganesti before but had never talked to him. "I'm Vanda."
He finished his cookie and grabbed another. "Did you know your hair is purple?"