“Clumsy, clumsy,” Ty muttered with a sad shake of his head.
“I"ve probably had enough,” he claimed as he sat back in his seat. He smiled slowly and held up Zane"s key card. “It"s useful for other ventures as well.”
Zane hadn"t even noticed. “Well, that"s embarrassing,” he muttered as he shook his head. But he still smiled.
Ty handed it back to him. “That"s a different lesson.” He took another sip from his glass of Scotch and then picked up the glass he"d dropped and set it on the table again. He dropped a few ice cubes into it, then poured out some of his Scotch into it. Then he added more ice.
He gestured to the glass. “One drink is two.”
“If I let that much ice melt into it, there"s no way I"d get even a remote buzz,” Zane observed.
“And that"s the point,” Ty murmured. He gulped down what he"d just poured into the water glass. “Now I"ve ordered and, in theory, consumed three drinks. Still only half a glass of Scotch is gone. You get the drift?”
Zane nodded. “Yeah, no problem,” he said quietly as he studied Ty"s face. He still looked worried. It was a simple set of ideas, but Zane figured he could put them into use without much trouble. The poker room was busy enough for him to move drinks around undetected.
“Sometimes, if you get there first, you can get an empty glass.
Switch them out somehow, like I just did, or dump drinks under tables or in plants or decorations. A lot of it"s situational. Your best friends are extra ice and clumsiness.” Ty shot back what remained of the Scotch he had ordered. “Okay, let"s go find you some dry pants,” he said in a hoarse voice as he set the glass down on the table with a clank.
“I"m thinking you"ll feel better behind a locked door,” Zane agreed as he stood up. “And then tonight I get to practice my lessons.”
Ty stood and stepped over to Zane. He slid his hand around Zane"s waist and pulled him closer. “I know it"s hard,” he whispered.
“But next time you think you might need a second glass, just remember that I will kick your ass when you get home.” He punctuated the threat with a forceful kiss.
The words flowed over and into Zane and sank in deep as he gave in under Ty"s lips. He"d already known he"d answer to Ty, anytime, anywhere. But now Zane believed, for the first time in so long, that he had someone who truly cared about him.
AFTER the climbing wall scare and the Del Porter nonemergency, Zane had been sure they would be plagued by other accidents and loudly insisted they should avoid excursions that involved gravity. But the past three days had been oddly threat-free, enough so that Ty had started wondering if the rope at the rock wall had really been an accident after all. If it hadn"t been for that visit from Armen, Ty might have been able to convince himself.
After Armen"s little “discussion,” though, neither Ty nor Zane could relax. It made what might have been an enjoyable few days tense and frustrating.
Among other activities on their itinerary, they went waterskiing and kayaking off a private island near Haiti, one owned by the cruise line. The first was not to Ty"s tastes, but Zane had called it exhilarating and said he wouldn"t mind trying it again. The kayaking was enjoyable for no other reason than Ty could begin humming “Dueling Banjos” at Zane whenever he wanted, and Zane couldn"t manage to smack him with his paddle without tipping the kayak over.
Zane played poker with Armen, Bianchi, and some other high rollers every evening for an hour or two. He was able to pry a few vague details out of Bianchi about his part of the business, but Armen remained close-lipped. So Zane contented himself with winning modestly, and Ty had been honestly surprised when Zane had handed him a $10,000 poker chip one night. Apparently 10K was modest for the Porters. It wasn"t likely they"d get to keep it—the FBI had a way of collecting everything it could get after an assignment—but the money wasn"t the point. Ty knew that Zane just liked the rare moments when he succeeded in surprising him. And he had.
On yesterday"s excursion, they had hiked for five hours through a rainforest in Puerto Rico to the “Exciting Jungle and Zip-line Adventure,” which really wasn"t all that exciting or adventurous, since it turned out to be a thirty-minute harness ride through the treetops. The hike itself had been more fun. Ty would have preferred to have kept on into the dense tropical forest, but he"d been assured the jungles weren"t safe for going out on his own. Ty had barely restrained a snort when the serious young guide had said those words. Ty was pretty sure he could have shown the kid what an unsafe jungle really looked like.
On today"s agenda was the “thrilling cliff diving experience for swimmers young and old,” a chance to plunge fifty-five feet from a natural rocky cliff into the protected cove below. Now this Ty could get behind. He seemed to be among the few, though, because there were a lot of people going to the top of the cliff and almost as many walking back down.
Looking up at the height from which the few brave souls were leaping, Ty had doubts that Zane would be able to handle it.
“It"s a long hike up there,” Ty tried casually, glancing sidelong at his partner. “Been a long day too. We can skip it and head back to the ship if you want.”
“I don"t mind hiking up there,” Zane answered with a shrug. “I know you"ve been looking forward to this all week.”
Ty snorted. He"d known Zane would pass on the easy out if he offered it. “It"s a long climb, darling,” he said in a low voice, still mindful of those around them who could overhear. “No need for you to make it if you just plan to walk back down.”
Zane studied him for a moment before glancing up the cliff. “I"d rather have the company for at least part of the time, doll.”
Ty looked him over carefully for a long moment before nodding.
“If you insist,” he said with a smile, then began making his way toward the narrow trail.
The climb wasn"t terribly steep, since the path was cut into switchbacks up the mountainside to preserve the natural flora, so it took a little time to get up there. They walked quietly for a few minutes before Zane spoke up. “It"s not the height, you know.”
“It"s the falling,” Ty finished for him with a nod.
“Yeah,” Zane murmured. “You know me; always want to be in control.” He snorted like he"d made a joke.
Ty watched his footing diligently, smiling to himself while Zane couldn"t see his expression. He knew all too well how anything Zane couldn"t control, or at least figure out, drove the man to unbearable reaches of crazy. “Yeah,” he finally said softly. “But sometimes you miss the best things because you can"t control them.”
“Like what?” Zane"s voice was relaxed and reflected some curiosity.
Ty smiled wider, glancing behind him to get a look at Zane. “If you have to ask….”
“There are things I do even though I can"t control them,” Zane said pointedly as he swatted at Ty"s ass. “But choosing free fall? No.
I"d rather face… snakes in the mountains,” he said with a little chuckle at the end.
Ty snorted derogatorily, unappreciative of the attempt at humor.
He still found very little about that episode of mountain hiking gone wrong funny.
“Right. It"s the difference between something just edgy enough to get a high and something truly scary,” Zane said as they slowed near the top of the cliff.
Ty shook his head and sighed. The view up here was beautiful, but it was often depressing for Ty to catch a glimpse into Zane"s thought processes. He would much rather stare at the ocean beyond the cliff. “You"re all about the high,” he said sadly.
Zane edged one shoulder up. “Can"t deny that, I guess.”
Ty would have had to call bullshit if he"d even tried. Ty turned to look at him. The sun was setting, casting a warm glow over everything, including Zane. Sometimes Ty wished he knew what to say to help Zane, but then he reminded himself he wasn"t exactly what one could call stable, either. There was a lot of pot and kettle going on here.
Instead of anything particularly inspiring, he just waved his hand at the cliff"s edge. “Endorphin rush is one hell of a high. Sure you don"t want to jump?”
Zane raised a brow and walked over to the railing, where he peered over the side and watched another man jump, screaming and flailing all the way down to the dark pool of water far below. He turned, a wry smile in place, and rejoined Ty with a pleasant, “Hell no.
You go right ahead.”
“Fair enough. Are you going to freak out if I do it?”
The smile stayed, but Ty could see Zane"s shoulders tense slightly. “No.”
“If you"re going to lie, baby, at least do it with flair,” Ty said wryly.
Zane rolled his eyes. “Oh doll, if something were to go wrong, how would I ever go on without you?” he drawled in a melodramatic singsong. Then he shook his head. “I won"t freak out,” he said more seriously. “I don"t like it, but I"ll deal.”
Ty gave him a thorough appraisal, not certain why he wanted Zane to take the chance and jump with him. But he did. He also knew he wouldn"t be convincing him to do it. He knew that with the same certainty he knew Zane wasn"t in love with him. The comparison dampened the thrill of jumping, that was for sure.
Zane reached out, clasped Ty"s wrist, and pulled him gently closer. Then he dipped his head to brush their lips together for a few bare seconds. When he straightened, the smile was Zane"s, not the fake smirk he"d been using to play Corbin. “Go on. You"ll enjoy it.”
Ty found himself smiling wanly, appreciating the effort. “I"d enjoy it more if I could shove you off first,” he said in a teasing, coaxing voice.
Zane"s physical reaction wasn"t one Ty recognized right off. It was almost a wince, barely there, a caught breath that he overcompensated for, eyes blinking hard. It was gone in a couple of seconds, but when Zane"s gaze darted to the edge of the cliff and back, Ty realized Zane was truly scared. He hid it well, but not well enough.
“I"ll have to see what I can do tonight to make it up to you,” Zane said after a little too long of a pause.
“You do that,” Ty said softly, regretting the teasing. He stepped discreetly to the side to block Zane"s view of the cliff, and he kissed him quickly. “Now head back down so you don"t see me jump. I"m not walking back down that freaking hill when there"s a faster route.”
Zane nodded slowly and backed away a couple steps. He paused, as if he was going to say something, but he managed a pretty convincing smile before he turned and followed the path down.
Ty waited a breath, then turned to find the attendant near the edge of the cliff watching him expectantly. There were a few people still milling about, but they all seemed ready to turn back rather than going through with it.
“My turn?” Ty asked the attendant brightly. The man smiled and nodded.
Ty took one last glance down the path, patting down his pockets to make certain he"d left everything with Zane, spending those last seconds to steel himself.
He"d told Zane once, but he wasn"t sure if Zane remembered that Ty was afraid of heights too.
With one last hesitation, Ty turned and sprinted for the cliff"s edge, throwing himself over before he could have second thoughts about the jump.
The part Ty both dreaded and loved about falling was the rush of fear itself.
Chapter 9
THE assignment was starting to wear on them. The experience of living in a fancy stateroom, eating incredible food, and enjoying the excitement of their daily itineraries had quickly faded into a slightly fearful, somewhat dreadful obligation that was certainly convincing Zane that they were here to work instead of play.
He had hoped yesterday"s evening of shopping on St. Thomas would turn up some business, but it had been tense, dull, and disappointing, just like the rest of the week had been. That dangerous amalgam made for a cranky partner but some seriously hot sex at night.
Sex. He and Ty had been all over each other for days now. While Zane had no complaint whatsoever, it was really bizarre trying to remember that they were supposedly working. The waiting was getting to both of them, and the sex was the only outlet they had aside from the rare foray into a carefully planned adventure like that zip line across the treetops. Each night—or day, as the case proved to be more often than occasionally—grew progressively more heated and intense.
Zane"s emotions were as well, and he was having a difficult time keeping in mind that the constant proximity and living the lie of being Corbin and Del Porter skewed those emotions. It didn"t mean the close, passionate connection between him and Ty was as real as it felt.
Everything would change when they went home. Ty would change.
Zane sighed and resolved not to think about it as he pulled his shirt over his head and tossed it toward the sofa. It was exhausting, having a good time. They"d been here seven extra-long, activity-filled, frightfully boring days, and he was thinking spending most of one in bed sounded like a great idea, especially after Ty and his daredevil diving had strained Zane"s nerves yesterday.
Zane"s reticence hadn"t prevented Ty from running at full speed toward the edge of the cliff and throwing himself off it with the kind of cavalier pleasure only the insane could maintain and live through. Zane hadn"t told Ty, but he"d stopped at the railing around the mountainside and watched his lover jump over the edge. Zane"s heart had plummeted as if it had been him taking the leap. He had to say one thing: Ty"s form was beautiful as he dove toward the placid pool below. He wondered if it was something that came naturally or if it was all Ty"s training.