The bike slowed down as we approached the last break in the two-lane highway before the interstate.
Jack turned into the break in the median and came to an idling stop. He shifted and turned as far as he could to me. There was no one around, so he pulled his helmet off and flipped up my visor. We were both grinning stupidly, although he couldn’t see my mouth. His hair was sticking up all over the place. I was sure people paid fortunes to have their hair look like that. I couldn’t say the same for what mine was going to look like.
“Are you okay?”
“Yes, this is amazing.” I meant it.
His brow furrowed. “What happened back there? I felt you suddenly tense up on me. Did I scare you?”
My eyes flicked down for a second in embarrassment. I hadn’t realized I had had such a physical reaction to my memory of last night.
I took a deep breath and decided to come clean. “I was thinking about last night in front of the fire,” I said, looking him straight in the eye. “Thinking about how you made me feel. I want to do that again.”
I literally saw him lose his breath. I knew what he looked like when he was aroused, and this had certainly done the trick. He wasn’t laughing anymore.
“Shit. Keri Ann,” he croaked, his mouth firming into a grim line. He mashed his helmet back on his head and turned back to the road. “Hang on,” he said and gunned the engine.
I hung on. I guessed I had gone too far. He looked seriously pissed off. We drove back toward the island at about the speed we had left it. But now that he was probably taking me home and putting an end to our evening plans, it wasn’t quite as fun for me. We should have put an end to the whole thing this morning, or last night before I knew what it was like to be touched by a god. Or maybe even before then so my heart hadn’t gotten tangled in the mix.
We didn’t head home. As soon as we hit the end of the bridge, Jack took the next turn down to Broad Landing. He circled down under the bridge and pulled the bike to a stop. The sun was really low in the sky casting an orange glow over everything.
Relieved, I climbed off the bike, my legs feeling like jelly and took off the heavy back pack and my helmet. “This is where I kayak from.”
Staying astride the bike, Jack flipped the kickstand down and took off his helmet, too.
I caught his eyes for a moment. I wanted to apologize for being so forward, but his arm suddenly shot out and hauled me against him.
His other hand smoothed the hair from my face, and then tunneled into the braid at my nape, pulling it loose. His fingers worked through the strands, separating them gently but insistently as I gazed into his eyes. When he was done, his hand massaged my neck and scalp slowly. It felt good.
I had no idea what Jack was seeing in my blue eyes, but I could see a thousand questions in his. Questions I felt I’d never have the answer to. I stared up into his beautiful face. I wanted to tell him how amazing he was, how talented. How he was so much more, and he didn’t ever have to doubt his worth or measure it against the adoration of his fans or the dictates of his handlers. Or ever be afraid of whatever had happened to him as a child. We were so close I could see small tiny freckles across his upper cheekbones and a small faint scar I had never noticed before in his eyebrow. An imperfection that made him all the more perfect.
I lifted a finger and traced it gently, then smoothed the small furrow that appeared between his eyes. “Jack ... I was always told to live life, to grab it with both hands ... I never have.” I swallowed over my nerves, hoping the words were coming out right. “You were right, last night. I have been afraid to start living my life. Living means loving, and I know this sounds dumb, but all that has ever given me is pain. First losing my parents and then Nana. I know that’s a stupid parallel to draw for never wanting to date anyone or ... be with anyone.”
Jack smoothed a lock of hair away from my eyes. I was absolutely pinned to the moment by the intensity in his gaze. I tried to go on without tripping over my words. “I don’t want to be anymore. Afraid, I mean.”
Jack eyes flickered. “Sweetheart, there hasn’t been one moment when I’ve considered you afraid. I look at you, and all I see is certainty. Courage. Bravery. God, I’ve never met anyone so sure and so strong in who they are.” His mouth tilted up on one side. “It’s ... epic.”
I was humbled, and to be honest, floored by his words. That was never how I saw myself. Ever. I was afraid of everything. I dropped my eyes a moment, but Jack’s finger under my chin urged me to look up at him. I steeled myself to get it all out before I lost my nerve. “And I don’t want any regrets. I’ve never been ... frivolous, never done anything without weighing up the consequences. I feel like I’ve always had a heavy heart ... Nothing—no one,” I amended, “ever seemed worth taking a risk for.” I took a deep breath and shored up my nerves. “This is. You are. I can’t explain it. I—”
Jack’s mouth parted slightly, although I had no idea if that was good or bad. His gaze roamed over my face to my mouth, effectively cutting off my words.
I didn’t finish talking, but let my hand drift around to the back of his head and pulled him down to my mouth.
He didn’t resist.
I let out a soft sigh as his lips met mine. It was so right. This felt so right. It was like it spoke to me deep in my soul. I opened my lips to him and accepted the soft slide of his tongue and heard him groan deep in his chest. I wound my hand into a fistful of his hair. I could feel this kiss through my whole body, and my heart swelled in my chest and my legs shifted to get closer.
I wasn’t sure who instigated the move, but suddenly I had a leg across his lap and his hand on my thigh was dragging me astride him.
He’d lifted me effortlessly.
I let out a heavy breath as my skirt rode up, and I pressed my whole body to him.
“God,” Jack groaned.
My head tipped back, gasping, as Jack’s mouth found my neck.
He was hard and swollen beneath me. Moaning, I rocked forward against the rough ridge of his jeans.
“Christ,” he hissed out. His arm locked around my waist and pressed me down hard against him.
I whimpered. Couldn’t help it.
He dragged his lips up to mine and plundered my mouth as we rocked against each other. There was no argument in the world that could have convinced me Jack shouldn’t be inside me at that moment.
“Take me home,” I managed, between kisses. He pulled his mouth away from mine, breathing hard, and searched my eyes. His gaze, made luminous by the sunset we were missing, was piercing. I knew what he’d said to me last night and this morning, and I knew I faced rejection again, but I had to try. I wanted this. I wanted him. And I wanted him sealed in my heart forever. No matter what happened.
“Please ... make love to me, Jack.”
He closed his eyes tight and let out a breath, dropping his forehead to mine. After what felt like an eternity, he drew me into a tight embrace, his face buried in my neck. I wound my arms around his head and shoulders holding him tightly back. If this was all I could have of Jack, I would take it with my heart wide open.
He was going to say no. I mentally prepared for his answer and tried hard not to let the feeling of rejection unfold inside me. I knew I should take the words back and take the decision away from him before he had to tell me no again. It wasn’t fair of me to ask him to reject me again when we’d already talked about this.