“Yes, this is very important,” he murmured against my sensitive skin as his head moved lower on my chest and drew a nipple into his mouth. That was all it took for me, I was a goner and all was forgiven. It was decided ~ we were moving to California.

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

Down In the Valley ~ The Head and the Heart

Can’t Stop Lovin’ You ~ Aerosmith (feat Carrie Underwood)

MASON

I really had no clue what to expect once I got resettled into my apartment, especially with Andi living there with me. After Scarlett left us that first evening, we both went back to our rooms and spent most of our time in there. Even though we had just been grocery shopping, the last thing I felt like doing was cooking or dirtying up the kitchen, so I just ordered some pizza and wings for us, which we both ate in the privacy of our own bedrooms. Luckily, however, it didn’t feel forced or awkward with her. It wasn’t like we were great friends or felt like we needed to entertain each other, we were just roommates and it was surprisingly comfortable from the very beginning.

Waking up the following morning in my apartment for the first time in months did feel a little weird. I wasn’t sure what exactly to do with myself to be quite honest. I had an appointment with Heather early in the afternoon and then I was taking Andi to Empty’s to introduce her to Marcus and get her set up with a job. I decided to go for a run, more to waste time than anything else. When I got back an hour or so later, Andi was lounging on the couch watching television and the house smelled of good cooking.

She looked up as I walked through the door and smiled. “Hey you,” she said, her eyes drifting to the tattoo that covered my right rib cage and disappeared into my basketball shorts. Pulling her eyes back to mine, she continued, “I thought you were here so I made some breakfast, but you never came out of your room. It’s in the microwave if you’re hungry. It should still be warm.”

“Thank you so much, you didn’t have to do that, but it smells delicious,” I replied with a grin. I walked directly into the kitchen and grabbed the plate of eggs, bacon, and breakfast potatoes and inhaled it in less than five minutes. I’m not sure if it tasted so damn good because I had been eating hospital food for a month and a half or due to her excellent culinary skills, but either way it was like heaven in my mouth. I washed off my plate when I had finished and loaded it in the dishwasher.

As I walked past her on my way to the shower, I complimented her. “Andi, that was amazing. Thank you again.” She smiled and nodded before returning her attention to whatever she was watching on the TV.

Once I was stripped and under the spray of warm water, I exhaled a deep breath that I didn’t even realize I was holding. I never realized how hard it was to simply live before; I had always just done it ~ day after day. However, the previous twenty four hours made up the longest day of my life. It was as if each minute I had to keep my mind occupied, thinking what I was going to do next. Shaking off my sudden need to over-analyze everything and anything, I quickly washed up and got dressed for my appointment with Heather.

Seeing Heather’s face was a complete relief for me. Even though it was in her office instead of the rehab facility, it felt comfortable sitting across from her talking. Apparently the emotions and thoughts I had been having were completely normal because the first thing she asked me was, “Do you feel like you’re living someone else’s life?”

As soon as she asked, I realized that was exactly how I felt ~ like I was living a different person’s life. I nodded and half-screamed at her, “Yes! That’s it!”

She smiled and chuckled a bit. “That’s completely normal, Mason. What you need to realize is that it’s still your life, you’re just looking at with a clarity that you haven’t had in quite some time. Even before you began drinking and using heavily, you still had a distorted vision of not your life so much, but what was going on around you.”

“So you’re saying I was a self-centered asshole to everyone before?” I asked, half-joking.

“Pretty much,” she answered with a grin, but I knew she was dead serious.

The rest of our appointment followed the same format as the previous ones did ~ I talked, she listened. I had never found it so easy to talk to someone before I had met her. I told her everything… things that had happened in my past, how I truly felt about everything, things I wished for the future; I held nothing back from her. She honestly wasn’t overly thrilled about the Andi situation, but she said she understood why I did it. Her main concern was that if one of us relapsed, it could affect the other, but since Andi’s issue was not really alcohol or drug related, she was hopeful that we could help and encourage one another.

When I got back to the apartment, I heard the shower running and was happy that Andi was already getting dressed to head up to the bar. I wanted to get there a little early to talk to Marcus. Since I was already dressed, I took the time to rest a bit on the couch and watch some mindless television. I found my thoughts drifting to Scarlett and what she was doing. I really wanted to text or call her, but I knew that wasn’t my place. I had faith that she wasn’t going to stop visiting now that I was out, but I couldn’t help but worry that things wouldn’t be quite the same. Our relationship had come a long way in the past month ~ we were actually friends now, and I really didn’t want to lose that.


A little after five in the afternoon, we pulled up to the back of Empty’s and I parked in my old parking spot. I kept reminding myself of what Heather had said, that I was just seeing things in a different, more selfless light. I could tell that Andi was a bit nervous as she apprehensively walked around the car and to the back door to catch up with me.

Wanting her to feel confident, I reassured her before opening the door. “Everyone is really nice here, and they’re all gonna love you. Don’t be surprised if they all try to make you their little sister though, okay?”

She smiled at me with those incredible blue eyes and her face lit up at my words. Seeing her dressed in fashion jeans with a snugly fitting long-sleeved top, her hair fixed and make up on, I realized how pretty she was. Her face was very young and innocent looking, almost like a little doll, and suddenly I felt protective over her. I wasn’t sure exactly what her relationship was with her family, but obviously it wasn’t good. I just couldn’t imagine anyone not wanting to love this girl, and if one of these fuckers at the bar tried to mess with her, I’d go big brother crazy on them.

We walked through the back hallway and I pointed out the apartment, the changing rooms, and the break room before we arrived at Marcus’ office. As usual he was elbows deep in paperwork and had his signature serious look on his face. I tapped on the door to alert him of our presence, and when he looked up from his desk, a smile spread across his face. He quickly stood up and walked over to us, giving me a huge bear hug, “It’s so good to see you here, Rat. I’ve missed you.”

I had never realized how much his love and support really meant to me, but after these last few months when we had really grown apart, partly because of my move to Austin and partly because I had shut him out of my life, I now knew that I both needed and wanted him to be in my life, no matter where I was. “It’s good to be back, bro,” I responded as I squeezed him back. “Really fucking good.”

As we released each other he looked down at my tiny companion, grinning, “And you must be Andi,” he said warmly and extended his hand. “I’m Marcus, this jack ass’ brother and your new boss I suppose. It’s a pleasure to meet you, sweetie.”

She smiled brightly and put her delicate hand in his, “It’s really nice to meet you, and I can’t thank you enough for giving me a job. I promise I won’t disappoint you.”

“You are old enough to serve alcohol, right?” he asked her, half-jokingly.

Laughing, she nodded her head. “Yes, but just barely. I turned eighteen last week. Do you need my license and all of that stuff?”

“Rat boy will get you your paperwork to fill out and then show you around,” he replied, looking over at me to make sure that was okay.

“Yup, come on, little one, let’s finish the tour,” I said, putting my arm around her shoulder. “You can fill out all the forms at the bar.” I looked back at Marcus as I led her out into the main room, and his lingering smile filled me with joy.

After showing her around and introducing her to the other employees, we got all of the necessary paperwork completed just before the door opened and people slowly started trickling in. At first I had set her up to follow one of the other waitresses around, but she insisted that she could handle it on her own. I wanted to show that I had faith in her, so I agreed, but made her promise to find me if she needed any help or anyone gave her any trouble.

Several hours into the night, I came out of the office to see that the place had filled up nicely; I was excited to get back to some normalcy. I knew that 32 Leaves was going to be playing later and I was hoping to get a chance to talk to Max. We had been pretty good friends when I had first met Scarlett and he was dating Evie, and with everything that had happened last year, I really just wanted to clear the air with him. I headed in the direction of their usual table and was relieved to see him sitting there .

“Hey, Max,” I said as I walked up. All of the heads at the table turned to look at me, and I cringed internally knowing what they were all thinking. I took a deep breath, shook it off, and smiled at all of them. I nodded my head at the rest of the table. “Mina… Noah… guys… good to see you all.” Everyone said hello, but I could feel the tension in the air.

Mina, God love her sweet soul, came over and gave me a hug, making me feel a little better. “It’s good to see you back, Mase. You had us all a little worried.”

I smiled meekly. “Yeah, well I’m getting back on track now… just a little derailment. Thank you though, and I’m really sorry about the wed…”

“Shh! No need to apologize. Just promise me you aren’t gonna do anything stupid again,” she interrupted me.

Chuckling, I said, “I can’t promise I won’t do anything stupid, but I’m not getting mixed up in that shit again. I’ve got too much to live for.”

“Good, that’s what I want to hear,” she replied as she walked back over to her barstool.

Just as I was going to ask Max to talk for a minute alone, Andi walked up to the table. “Good evening, guys. What can I get you to drink?” I watched as she made her way around the table, getting each of their orders, ready to pounce if any of them made a lewd remark towards her. Luckily for them, they were all very respectful, but I couldn’t help but notice the way she and Max looked at each other when they interacted, almost as if they knew each other. I made a mental note to ask her about it when we got back to the apartment later.

When she walked away to the bar to get their drinks, one of the guys asked, “Who’s the new waitress, Rat? Are y’all recruiting at the local high schools now?”



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