I lowered my head in defeat, and Tudor leaned in to comfort me. I couldn't help it, I began to cry. As much as my over-the-top queen and I squabble, it’s always just friendly banter. This was him really telling me what for. He was really angry – granted, it was mostly because of the paint, but it still felt like shit. How could I start a relationship with someone when my best friend, my soul mate, didn't approve?

I tucked my head into the comfort of Tudor's large chest and let the floodgates open. I pressed my head against his shirt, knowing that if I had to choose, at this point it would have to be Tink, but the pain it would cause me, knowing what could have been with Tudor, caused me to feel nauseous. I could fall in love with this man, hell, who was I kidding? I was falling in love with him, it had been building for weeks. It had been growing steadily every day since the morning of my concussion, and now that we were officially together, it was intensifying ten-fold. I couldn't help my feelings.

I heard Tudor draw a ragged breath, and looked up to see his sad eyes and him shaking his head, resigned. He kissed a falling tear on each side of my face and pressed his forehead to mine. "I won't come between you and Tink, Sunshine. I'll give you some time and see you again when it's all calmed down, okay? Look at me."

I met his gaze and shook my head; I didn't want him to leave.

"Hey, I'm not giving you up, but I'm not going to wreck a life-long friendship either. You made me yours, remember? I told you you're stuck with me."

I nodded silently, soaking my cheeks with salty droplets. Tudor moved in to give me a slow, deep kiss, and got up from the couch.

I watched him walk away, before he stopped and faced Tink. "I know you don't like me much, and I am the first to admit that my past behaviour with Tash has been horrendous and unforgivable and therefore I understand, but just know that I would do anything for her. I can't give her up, not now.

“It is my deepest wish that you and I, at some point, can move past this and be friends too. You’re the boyfriend of my best friend, and I'm now the boyfriend of yours. I know you would like me if you just gave me a chance, and I hope you realise that I will never do anything to hurt Tash ever again, and us fighting is hurting her more than anything. So I'll go and let you work this out."

Tudor gave me a final strained, lopsided smirk and made his way to the door. I turned to Tink, whose bottom lip was shaking. I smiled at my bloody daft best friend. "Tink."

His face crumpled and he started to cry hysterically, like only Tink can.

He dived to the couch and began to wail. "I'm sorry, piglet. I thought I was protecting you but I'm hurting you, aren't I?"

I gripped him tightly in a hug. "You are protecting me, but Tudor won't hurt me, you have to trust that too. I really like him, chuck, like, Elton John and David Furnish-style like him; I’m even going so far as to say that I’d pick him over your treasured Mother Monster Gaga at this point."

Tink swooned, complete with hand on head, and fell off the couch at my confession, fanning his face with the Madonna Sex Book we keep on the table for visiting guests to peruse.

After receiving some much-needed air, he staggered to his feet, casually licking Madonna’s protruding nipple on an open page, and put his hand on my knee. “Wil, I didn’t realise it was that serious, not so much that you’d renounce your Little Monster status to keep him! By all the glitter in Hobbycraft, I’ve been blind! Blinded by my prejudice towards the big, tattooed Canuck, but now I see you were born to be together!”

Over the top as always!

Tink released a blood-curdling shriek and ran to the doorway where Tudor was just leaving. "Tudor, come here, you big brute!" and he wrapped his arms around Tudor’s neck, crying (or singing – the jury’s still out) loudly, dangling off him like a necklace.

Tudor, looking very deer-in-the-headlights, glanced towards me, seeking some help. I started to laugh and gave him a thumbs-up that made him smile, and he awkwardly patted Tink on the back.

The dedicated Little Monster pulled back, all smiles. "We’re now friends, big boy, but hurt my little tenderloin over there and we’re gonna throw-down! Capisce?"

Tudor slapped his back and winked. "Capisce!"

Tink tilted his head to me, "Wilbur, get involved... group hug!" he sang.

I ran over and wrapped an arm around each of my guys. Tink kissed us both on the cheek and drew back. "Just so you know, I don't wanna see any more wall-fucking in the condo hallway, but feel free to spit-roast Wilbur’s hungry beaver in the comfort of her bedroom."




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