"When I was young, I wondered what they did together. I knew roughly what a man and woman did but . . ."

"God, Sarah!" I felt her move to cover her face in horror.

"It's a legitimate question. I'll tell you," I volunteered, "at least as much as I guess. They cuddle. They kiss and hug." I proceeded to offer a few more details, in enough of a general way to qualify as an answer.

"God, Sarah! Stop it! That's disgusting!"

"I don't mean to shock you, just answer your questions."

"That's so gross! So bad!"

"Is it?"

"Don't tell me you think stuff like that is natural!"

"I'm not making judgments; it's not my place. Who am I to condemn someone whose feelings I can't hope to understand?"

"What would your mother; Grandma say? I mean, if you wanted to marry a woman or something."

I squirmed in my sleeping bag to find a comfortable position. "That's a tough one. You have to picture a far different time. Things like that weren't discussed openly and practically no one was out-of-the-closet-gay, at least not in everyday society like I lived in. My parents wouldn't have been malicious against a gay or lesbian but I'd be lying if I told you they'd accept it with open arms, especially their daughter in that life style. It would have been bewildering to them."

"Would they have disowned you?"

"No way. Their love was unconditional; the same as mine, and your father's love or you. My parents wouldn't have understood and been disappointed, maybe even disgusted. In their mind I'd be destined for hell, but they wouldn't have deserted me. Maybe just locked me up or tried to cure me."

"You're just saying that."

"No, I know. I remember an instance with my sister. We used to sleep together, especially when we were young and this one summer night we slept naked, just for the fun of it."

"Together?"

"Yup. Totally bare-ass and we were rolling around tickling each other and horse-playing when my mother came into the room."

"How old were you?"

"About your age. Maybe a tad older. My sister and I were totally honest and totally intimate together; not in a sexual way but we were perfectly at ease with each other, mind and body. Honesty was sacrosanct. We trusted each other implicitly."

"What did your mother do? She had to wonder if you were . . . that way, even if you weren't."

"She laughed and asked if she should strip down and join us!"

"She didn't! What did you say?"

"I think we hid our heads and were mortified. I'm sure she was just kidding but my point is, she trusted us to do what was right and just made a joke of it instead of going ballistic and giving us hell."




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