His words stung. Deep inside, she knew she probably deserved them.
"Darkyn was too kind to you," Wynn continued. "He should've let you remember every wrong you committed so you could relive them every second of every day. You have the capacity to care now. Your tears would never stop if you were faced with the creature you were."
"I understand," she murmured.
"You're right," he finished. "It's too late for an apology, Deidre." The Ancient Immortal swept by her, his anger palpable.
Deidre watched him go. No longer hungry, she began to wonder how many other people she'd faulted over her lifetime.
She went back to her room, startled to find Gabriel there. The sight of him made her want to cry. She managed to hurt everyone around her, even her precious Gabriel.
They stared at each other. She wiped her eyes hastily. The tension around Gabriel was present. His muscular frame and direct gaze made her uneasy. He would never hurt her, but he'd never again touch her as he had the other day, either.
The silence grew taut.
"I went to see her," she said.
Gabriel crossed his arms. He said nothing.
"I don't know what else to say, Gabriel. I understand if you hate me. I just don't know what to do to fix things."
Her mate said nothing. Deidre's shoulders sagged. She turned away from him, wanting to be alone. Thinking of taking a dive in the lake and not surfacing again, except that it meant she'd lose her soul. She couldn't change anything that happened or make things right. Where did that leave her?
"Are you okay?" he asked.
"No. I can't be okay. I've hurt so many people."
"Are there any more secrets?"
She sighed and shook her head. "The ones I had weren't enough to drive you away?"
"I told you. No matter what, you're my mate."
Deidre glanced at him. Spending her lifetime with someone who hated her was not what she wanted.
"Now that everything's on the table," he continued. "This is where we start to rebuild."
Deidre stared at him. His faint smile contained sadness. Of all the things she'd done, she'd never be able to forgive herself for hurting him.
"How can you say that?" she asked. "You deserve so much better, Gabriel. All I do is cause pain."
"I never stopped loving you either, Deidre. You have no idea how much that makes me hate myself sometimes," he said. "Our path won't be easy, but we didn't spend thousands of years trying to be together not to take the chance we have now."
She searched his face. Even hurting, he was serious about everything he said. She didn't know how he could love her still after all she'd done or why he was willing to try to make things work. Had she ever understood how honorable and good he was?