"Who is Major Fairbairn?"
"I do not know; he is from Maine or New Hampshire, I think."
"Your parents, Daisy, would not desire these Northern
associations for you; would they?"
I do not know with what calm I faced the doctor and answered
him. "These Northern associations" - the words touched the
innermost beatings of my heart - if such an expression can be
used. Yet I looked at Dr. Sandford in absolute calm, knowing
all that the doctor did not know, and spoke with perfect
composure.
"I cannot escape them, you know, Dr. Sandford, unless I were
to go over to the enemy's lines; and I cannot do that."
"I would not wish that," said the doctor.
"Then your feelings continue all with the Northern men,
Daisy?"
"All -" I said.
I went back to my worsted work, but I had a sense that the
doctor was studying me. One cannot judge, of course, of one's
own manner, or know what is in it; so I cannot tell what had
been in mine. The doctor sat and considered me; I thought, in
some perplexity.
"Daisy's feelings are appreciated and returned by the Northern
men," Mrs. Sandford said, laughing. "Rides and walks - how
many rides and walks have you taken, Daisy, these forlorn
weeks, with officers of the Northern army? Oh! they are not
ungrateful."
Dr. Sandford made no answer, and when he spoke I knew he was
not making answer to these words. But they startled me.
"Is there anybody engaged in this struggle, Daisy, that you
are concerned for?"
"Certainly!" I said; - "several."
"I was not aware -" the doctor began.
"Some whom you know, and some whom you don't know, and on both
sides."
"You have a cousin, I believe, somewhere in the Southern army.
He was at West Point, if I remember."
"Preston Gary. I do not know where he is now, only he is among
them. They say, he is with Beauregard. I was very fond of him.
Then there is my brother; he either is with them or he will
be; and there are still others."
"On the Southern side," said the doctor.
"Those two are on the Southern side," I said. "Others are on
the Northern. I am there myself."
"Not exactly in the struggle," said the doctor; "and yet, I do
not know. These women!"
I think the doctor was baffled by my perfect quietness and
readiness. He spoke presently in a disengaged manner, "Mr. Ransom Randolph is in no danger at present. I know from a
word in a late letter from your father, that he is in Europe
still. Would you not like to get out of this confused state of
things, and join them there?"
"I would like better to go if it was peace here," I said.