“You have to make your own openings, Lord Kalliarkos.”
“Just call me Kal. We’re all adversaries here in the stable.”
No matter how well we get along we will never be just fellow adversaries, but I nod because when a Patron gives you an order, you obey it. “All right. My sisters call me Jes.”
The thought of my sisters chokes me all over again. What will Merry do now she’s lost any chance of being an Archivist? Poor Amaya and her broken dreams. Will Bett desert them and Mother? Where will they sleep? How will they live? I hope the broth’s steam swirling around my face disguises the tears that prick in my eyes.
This time he is so wrapped up in his own troubles that he doesn’t notice. “I went to the stable by Scorpion Fountain. That woman Anise turned me away. She said I would just bring trouble down on her and her people.”
He’s so indignant. He doesn’t want to be like other lords, yet it has never once occurred to him that the rest of the world won’t just give way when he gives them that cheerful smile.
“She probably guessed that you are connected to a palace.”
“I didn’t tell her my name!” He leans closer, watching me. “Whatever you’re thinking, you can say it to me.”
It’s uncanny how well he understands me. I know I shouldn’t feel this comfortable with him but I do, so I risk truth. “Your clothes and your highborn looks and the way you carry yourself tell a woman like Anise everything she needs to know about who you are and why you have come to her begging for training.”
“What do you mean?”
I sigh. “If you got angry at her or demanded special treatment, you could make trouble for her. If you were hurt, she could lose everything, even her life. She’s a Commoner, and you are a palace lord. Surely you see she might not want to risk having you there.”
He frowns.
I turn my mug around to do something with my hands. “You said they won’t train you here, but they are training you here. I don’t understand why you think you need Anise.”
“Real adversaries train every day except Sevensday. It’s their life. It’s all they do. But I have duties in the palace. I have a tutor. I have to learn the Precepts. I have a sword-master and a driving instructor. I’m required to attend court functions even though I have no interest in gaining influence at court. I want to train every day but my uncle forbids it by requiring me to do all these other things. If I show up here on days when he’s not given me permission to train, Tana and Darios must turn me away. Not that I fault them for their obedience,” he adds hastily. “It’s a trap my uncle has set for me.”
“Can’t Lord Thynos train you? Doesn’t your mother have some say in this? She’s Princess Berenise’s daughter, isn’t she?”
With a finger he draws a circle on the steam-dampened table like drawing a circle around words he knows he’s not supposed to say. “No, she isn’t. My father is Princess Berenise’s son, but he died years ago. Because my mother was brought from old Saro to marry my father, she has no support among the lords and royal court here in Efea. That means her brother, Thynos, has no power either. He is completely dependent on my mother’s treasury. He runs the Fives because he needs the prize money to keep up a separate establishment so he doesn’t have to live in Garon Palace. Even my sister is afraid of Uncle Gar. The only person I’ve ever seen stand up to him is my grandmother when she told him to give me a chance to prove myself at the Fives.”
His confession emboldens me to ask a question I would never have dared ask a lord before this moment sitting over cups of broth. “I know you said you don’t want to go into the army, but would it be so bad? Of course a soldier might die in battle but an adversary can die on the Fives court from a bad fall. You gain honor and reputation either way.”
A bleak expression darkens his face. “There’s more to my situation than that.”
Voices interrupt us. His hand tightens on the cup. Adversaries stroll in under the shelter, ostensibly to take a draught of passionflower juice or a cup of broth but obviously because they are curious about Kalliarkos and me. He bends toward me exactly as a conspirator would. With everyone looking I should not respond, but I lean closer too. His breath heats my cheek.
“Maybe we could go to Anise’s together. You could introduce me, tell her I won’t ask for special treatment. That I’ll behave just like all her other Novices.”
“Let me think about it,” I temporize.
Darios beckons.