Kyle kissed her forehead and glared at Hank. “How about if I pop you in the bath while Hank cleans up out here.”
“Sure.” She snuggled into Kyle’s chest with a sigh. “Just don’t let me fall asleep in the tub and drown.”
“No worries.” Kyle headed up the cabin steps, feeling the heat of Hank’s stare on the back of his neck.
Inside the cabin, he held Lainie on his lap as the tub filled. She wasn’t sleeping, but she didn’t attempt to talk either. When he shut the spigots off, she stood and stepped over the edge of the old-fashioned claw-foot tub. She sank beneath the surface of the water with a long, deep sigh.
Kyle couldn’t help but twine one of her corkscrew curls around his finger. “Need anything else?”
“I’d ask for a beer but that’ll definitely put me to sleep.” She trailed her fingers across the surface of the water. “What time is it?”
“A little after four.”
Her eyes widened. “No wonder you wore me out. You guys f**ked me for over an hour.”
“Complaints?”
“Not hardly.”
“Good.”
“I imagine you’re leaving for the rodeo pretty quick.”
“Yeah.” He released her hair. “You change your mind about coming along?”
Lainie shook her head. “If Hank wants to go, tell him I’ll be fine here by myself.”
“I think that’s why Hank ain’t goin’. Because you will be here by yourself.”
“He thinks he’ll sneak in alone time with me?” She snorted.
“Trust me. I won’t be in the mood at all tonight.”
“Sex is not all we want from you, Lainie. Hank and I both want more. Surely you realize that by now.”
With an irritated expression, Lainie slipped her arm from the lip of the tub and hunkered deeper into the water.
Kyle wouldn’t allow her snit. Mostly because he’d been in one of his own for the last few days. “Talk to me.”
“Neither of you expects more than a fling and that’s fine. That’s what we all signed on for. So when you guys say shit like that—which you both do—I don’t know if you’re trying to convince me or yourselves.”
“That’s kinda harsh, don’t you think?”
“Be honest, okay? If I said, ‘Kyle, let’s move in together,’ you wouldn’t yell, ‘Yippee!’ No. You’d balk. Backtrack. Suggest we take it slow. One, because where would we live? Colorado Springs? Rawlins? Cheyenne? Two, when would we see each other? I switch circuits, remember? I won’t always be assigned to the CRA.”
“Can you ask to be signed strictly to the CRA?”
“No. I’m part-time. Heck, I’d prefer no travel and stable nine-to-five hours.”
That floored him. “You would?”
Lainie jabbed her finger at him. “Yes. And that right there is why it wouldn’t work between you and me long-term, Kyle. You’re just now getting your career back on track. You’ll be chasing eight for the next couple years, or at least until you get the demons out of your soul. Settling down isn’t on your itinerary. Maybe if you were forced out of the rodeo life, but I’ll bet you weren’t exactly pleasant when you were recovering from the blown-out knee that sidelined you for an entire year, were you?”
Admitting he’d been a total jackass would put him in an even worse light. He hedged, “Probably not.”
“Same thing with Hank. He’s killing time on the road with you, with the CRA, with me, waiting for that EBS tryout next week.”
Kyle’s jaw dropped. “He told you about that?”
“No. Celia let it slip when we were at the ranch. She assumed that as Hank’s girlfriend I’d know his future plans.”
“But you haven’t said nothin’ to Hank about knowing?”
“I haven’t said anything because it won’t change shit.”
Drip, drip, drip, echoed as the condensation from the mirror hit the pedestal.
“You wanna explain that?”
“Hank will be pulled in a bunch of directions. I’d never add to that burden. No matter how much I . . .” She closed her eyes and gestured distractedly. “This is why I never date rodeo cowboys.”
Lainie’s assessment was dead on. Kyle wasn’t ready to settle down, not even close to it. Not now that he was back riding bulls, winning money, and finding his footing after a year of struggle.
You wouldn’t consider settling down with a woman like Lainie, who is everything you ever wanted?
As the answer no shimmered on the surface of his subconscious, it was weighted with both relief and sadness. The hardest part was the realization that it didn’t matter—Lainie wasn’t his and never would be. She wasn’t in love with him. She was in love with Hank.
The truth sliced his gut with the pain of a slow, rusty knife.
Kyle swept his hand down the wet slickness of her arm and threaded their fingers together, knowing it’d be the last time he’d touch her like a lover.
Lainie looked up at him, confusion puckering her brow. “What?”
“I’ll let you finish your bath in peace.” He stood and leaned over to press a kiss on her damp forehead. “See you in the morning.”
He made tracks for the camper to get his gear and was surprised to find Hank sitting in the swivel chair, his boots up on the table, drinking a beer.