Claire looked down. Maybe she wasn’t ready to make this move. She hadn’t checked the American news feed in a few days, honestly, she hadn’t checked anything. As the adrenaline from her escape waned, the hidden fortune and impending move seemed burdensome. Claire was tired of making wrong decisions.
Phil leaned across the small table and covered her hand with his. The care and compassion she’d seen in his eyes was slowly turning to irritation. His voice was but a whisper in the din of conversation occurring on all sides of them. “Listen, it’s your choice and your money, but if you don’t make a decision soon, at the very least we need to leave Venice. I realize traveling is difficult for you; however, this is my job, to keep you safe—whether you accept it willingly or not.” His last phrase held a bit more determination than Claire appreciated.
With the hairs on the back of her neck springing to attention, Claire’s lingering sadness at what she’d lost gave way to her new independence. Sitting straight, she removed her hand from his and said, “You’re doing your job because I’m paying you—very well—I might add. It is my decision and I’m sick and tired of making the wrong ones.”
“Yes, you’re paying me and I’ve earned less for more. The fact remains, my job is to keep you safe”—his voice lowered again—“all the damn disguises in the world won’t keep you outside the radar on a public street in Venice. Despite the fact the FBI is probably looking for you, your ex-husband’s reward makes everyone a possible threat.”
As Claire moved to stand, so did Phil.
“Stop,” she declared.
He lifted a brow.
In a hushed but determined tone, she said, “I’m going for a walk. I don’t need a babysitter. I have my phone and I need to think. I’ll be back when I get back.” This time, she leaned toward him. “If you don’t respect my privacy, I’ll find another babysitter. I need a break.”
She saw the turmoil in his eyes. She wasn’t just a job to him, he genuinely cared about her. Claire knew that; nevertheless, she needed to think. Walking helped her do that. When he didn’t respond, Claire nodded and turned away. Though the sky was clear, the temperature was brisk, especially with the breeze blowing between the buildings. Claire reasoned it had to do with impending autumn and all the water.
With the tirade of thoughts swirling through Claire’s mind, the world around her was a blur. Unconsciously, her feet moved toward St. Mark’s Square, and her eyes watched the pigeons while directing her body to avoid other pedestrians. Though surrounded in all directions, none of the historical beauty registered. Her mind was busy searching for answers. She thought about Tony. They hadn’t seen one another for almost a month. Momentarily, memories of their last encounter filled her vision. She remembered him asking her again to go to Europe. The irony of the fact that she was now where he’d wanted her—wasn’t lost. If only she’d gone with him, perhaps she’d be enjoying the sightseeing, instead of hiding for her life. Berating herself, Claire recognized—another bad decision.
She didn’t want her move to be impulsive. Did she even want to move away—forever? Claire questioned: was Catherine truly that much of a threat? Then she remembered Tony’s parents and her parents. Could Catherine have been responsible for her parents’ accident as well? What about Simon? No—that didn’t make sense. Why would Catherine care about Simon Johnson? Claire knew in her heart, if Simon’s death wasn’t a real accident, the guilt belonged with Tony. If Tony was responsible for Simon, was he also responsible for her parents?
Her entire body ached with indecision. How could the woman she’d grown to love as a mother be responsible for so much? How could the man she loved also be guilty? Claire shuddered against the cool breeze as she remembered scenes she’d compartmentalized away. The images from 2010 streamed through her memories. They weren’t as vivid as they used to be—time does that. It takes away the color and dims the sound, yet as she wrapped her arms around herself and felt the tears fill her eyes, she knew, in early 2010, color hadn’t been necessary. The only thing that mattered was black.
This unwanted realization struck hard. No matter how much she wanted to love and trust Tony, that black veil of fear would always be nearby. She’d suppressed it and compartmentalized it away; however, its presence was what Catherine used to her advantage. Conceding to this revelation momentarily immobilized her. She sat upon a concrete bench facing the lagoon and watched the number of pigeons multiply at her feet. She didn’t see the other people, although they were all around. It wasn’t until she heard his voice that she even knew he was present.