“Maybe I should call him...” I tell Selena as she puts the chicken on the portable grill.
“Call who?”
“Blade.”
She stops what she’s doing and faces me. Without warning, her hand firmly slaps my cheek, tossing my head to the side. My skin burns and anger prickles across my flesh.
“What the hell, Selena?”
She pulls my phone from my hands and tosses it into the lounge room. It bounces off a fluffy, blue cushion and then onto my turquoise shaggy rug. “You cannot call him. He’ll use whatever sneaky shit he can to weasel his way back into your life. He cheated on you—a million times. You deserve someone better than him.”
“I know, but I should call him and see if he’s okay.”
She shook her head as she tied her curls into a bun on the top of her head. “He’s fine. Don’t convince yourself that he’s sitting at home staring at the phone waiting for you to call because he isn’t. He’ll be out somewhere hitting on girls and drinking until he passes out. Fuck that noise.”
I turn from her to pour Caesar sauce onto the salad mix. I know I’m not the one who did the wrong thing, but am I supposed to let six years go down the drain like it meant nothing? Is that how it works? Six years of your life is a long time to give to someone. I should at least clear the air between us so it makes me feel better about wasting so much time.
Selena finishes mixing the chicken with the salad and leaves it to cool.
“I need to pee.” She announces, leaving the kitchen in pursuit of the toilet.
As soon as I hear the bathroom door close I run for my phone and step outside. I dial Blade’s number and for the first time ever, he answers immediately.
“Are you fucking a guy named Seth Marc?” There’s no warmth to his voice and it startles me.
“Hello to you too...”
“Answer me.”
“Who told you that? And how do you even know who he is? He’s new to town.”
“A friend saw you with him at the steakhouse and everyone who follows amateur MMA knows who he is. I don’t want you seeing him.”
The demand in his voice instantly pisses me off. How dare he tell me what to do?
“I can see whoever I want to see. We aren’t together anymore, remember? I broke up with you.”
I don’t deny whether or not I’m seeing Seth. Blade thinks I’m boring and plain so I want him to see that other men—sexy men—want me. I want him to see that he messed up.
“Olly,” Blade breathes into the phone. “This guy beats people for a living. I don’t want you anywhere near him.” His tone takes a softer edge and it almost gets to me until I hear a girl in the background telling him to get back into the shower. I’m not going to lie, it hurt. Why did I even call him in the first place? I like the air between us just as it is—dirty—like him.
“I’ll continue to see Seth if I want to.” I’m sure he can hear the tremor in my voice, but I’m thankful he can’t see my hands shaking. “You don’t own me, no one does!” I hang up as the bathroom door opens.
Selena narrows her green eyes at me, folding her arms tightly across her chest. “Please tell me you did not just call Blade.”
I push past her. “Yep and you’ll be glad to know it’s still over between us.”
I throw my phone onto the couch and drop into a chair at the kitchen table. The look of the grilled chicken salad makes my mouth water. Regardless of how pissed off I am, a girl’s gotta eat. My stomach growls and I’m past the point of being hungry. I feel kind of nauseous, but everything smells so good. I dig into my salad eating large mouthfuls of chicken and lettuce, swallowing gratefully.
“So,” Selena begins, picking at her salad. “Are you going to tell me what happened with Blade?”
“I kind of told him I had a new boyfriend.” I say through a mouthful of food.
Her eyes widen. “What did he say?”
“That he doesn’t want me to see him.”
“Him?”
“I told him I’m dating Seth.”
“Who’s Seth?”
What? I’m about to throw my fork at her. “The guy from the steakhouse.”
She clasps a manicured hand over her mouth and laughs through the gaps between her slender fingers. “Jesus, O. Why’d you do that?”
I almost chuckle. “Because Blade seems to think I’m plain and no one else would want me. I want him to see that I am desirable to men—especially someone like Seth who, let’s face it, has a face and a body carved by God himself. He can have any girl he wants.”
“Not every girl.” Selena says, trying to make a statement. I angle my head and narrow my eyes at her, challenging her. Even Selena knows all a handsome guy has to do is bat an eyelid at her and she’ll go with it—he doesn’t even have to be handsome half the time.
She chews on a piece of lettuce, giggling. “I totally lied. I’d let him have me. Hell, if he was the one that asked for a blow job in the bathroom I’d do it and I’d pay him.”
I spit salad all over the table, unable to contain my laughter. Selena laughs too and soon, the conversation between Blade and I falls from thought. All I want to do is hang out with my best friend.
Chapter Five
Spending last night eating snacks and watching Mean Girls was exactly what the doctor ordered. After I dropped Selena at her father’s law firm, I went to the gym. I’m going to have to spend extra time on the treadmills today if I want to burn off all of the sugar and Trans fats I ate last night. It was worth it though.
I approach the building and as my fingers curl around the long door handle, I realize I’m holding my breath. I let it go slowly and open the door. Do not look at him. Do not look at him. I fail miserably and my eyes betray me, darting straight to where he was standing yesterday of their own accord. I pout when my gaze falls onto an empty space.
Seth isn’t here.
Suddenly, my motivation to be at the gym depletes.
“Olivia!” My dad calls from the window in the middle of the wall at least two stories up. He waves his hand in front of him, gesturing for me to come up the stairs.
I stroll to Dad’s office, wishing I was back in bed sleeping. I step in and close the door behind me. Dad’s office is his sacred place and I feel uncomfortable being here surrounded by memorabilia of his favorite martial artists and boxers in glass cases on the wall. Mom wouldn’t let him have a ‘man cave’ at home, so he started one at work. Sometimes I worry he takes things too far.
“Hey, Dad.” I say, dropping into a comfy chair opposite his desk.
He rises from his chair and shrugs on a jacket. “Olly, I need a favor.”
His words leave an unsettling feeling in my stomach, or maybe it’s the use of my nickname. Yuck. “...okay.”
“I need you to keep an eye on the gym for me today. Derrick is away on holiday and I have no one to run this place. I have a few doctors’ appointments for random tests.” He flicks his wrist like it’s no big deal and suddenly I become concerned. “But I should be back in a few hours.”
“Is everything okay?”
“Yeah, everything is fine. Your mother is just worried about my health.” He rolls his big, puppy dog eyes and I smile.
“Sure, I can do that for you.”
“You’re a good kid.” He stretches his arms out to me for a hug and I jump into them. His arms wrap around me and I’m engulfed by that typical father smell. I don’t even know how to describe it. Regardless, it’s comforting. “I’d never put this stress on you if your brother was here.”
“It’s not stress, Dad. It’s only for a day. I think I can handle it.”
He hands me a long list of all the things I need to do—things that he refuses to hire people to do when he opened this joint up when I was little. Things like; wiping down the equipment, collecting towels, emptying spit buckets, evaluating machines and loads of other bullshit jobs my dad shouldn’t have to do. He adjusts a photo of my brother and me as children before placing a soft kiss on my cheek. “Thank you.”
I follow him from the office and as we cross the gym floor to the front door, I see Seth.
He’s here.
He unzips his black hoodie and throws it onto a vacant chair. His fingers curl around the hem of his plain, white t-shirt and he pulls it over his head, exposing a delicious, never ending amount of muscle. His lips are pursed into a thin line as he takes to the bag bare handed. The way his fists connect with raw power and anger has me thinking something is wrong with him. He shows his teeth slightly each time his fists slam the bag and his brows are wrinkled, aging him. Pushing him to the back of my mind, I continue to walk Dad to the car and I wave him off before re-entering the gym. My phone vibrates and I pull it from my back pocket.
FROM: BLADE 8:59 A.M.
This is the last time I’m warning
you. Stop seeing that guy.
Wow. There’s nothing like a text from an ex telling you how to live your life to put you in a bad mood. I feel my face frowning and it hurts. I hate frowning.
TO: BLADE 9:00 A.M.
Leave me alone.
I feel my phone vibrating over and over in my pocket, but I don’t answer it. I have shit to do. It’s only nine a.m. and there are already a few towels littering the equipment. I do a quick circle of the floor, picking up towels and wiping down damp equipment. Soon, I’ll have to spray them so they’re clean and sterile for the next person.
Joy.
I purposely left the training rooms and boxing area for last. Secretly, I’m hoping Seth will be finished by the time I have to go to that section. I don’t want to feel...whatever I feel when I’m around him. I’m not that kind of girl, but he makes me wish I was… and I hate it. It makes me feel cheap and… dirty.
Reluctantly, I enter his area. I do a quick scan and thankfully there are no towels. I turn on my heel, smiling. I think it’s time for a well deserved break in Dad’s office.
“Wait,” Seth’s deep voice calls out to me and I freeze as dread slithers through my stomach.
I turn to face him and his expression would be completely sexy if the look in his eyes isn’t so unreadable. The white towel he holds in his hand falls to the ground. “You forgot one.”
I glance at the towel and then back to Seth’s stern face. I have no idea what he’s doing or what game he’s playing. Slowly, I make my way over to him. His face is unapologetic, as usual. I frown. There’s no lip twitch or warmth to his gaze. He must be really pissed off. Unfortunately for him I don’t feel like doing what he says—not today. I’m pissed off, too. I might have picked up the towel if another male hadn’t already demanded me to do something—or to stop doing something in Blade’s case. I stand before the huge, hunk of muscle and I’m in no way suddenly immune to the authority that’s pouring off of him, but I don’t like the way he spoke to me. I press my index finger against his hard, moist chest, doing my best to ignore the electrical current shooting through the tip of my finger and I produce my best ‘fuck you’ smile. “Pick up your own damn towel.”
I don’t walk away, even though I planned to in my head. I can’t and I have no fucking idea why. He’s in my personal space again and I don’t think I’m going to be able to escape this time. Our eyes stay locked, keeping each other in place. His hand finds my hip and my breath catches in my throat as he grips it, pulling me toward him. I’m breathless over his touch and he doesn’t seem the least bit affected by me. It feels like my chest is about to explode as my heart stutters, stops, then picks up again at an erratic pace. I stare at his lips, knowing exactly how they feel against my own skin. His face is still mad, but a hint of pleasure flares in his dark eyes as I go with his hand and step a little closer to his body. The finger I had on his chest flattens so my whole palm presses firmly against his flesh and I can feel his heart beat, pounding as fast as mine is. The silence between us is charged with electricity and a tingling begins at the center of my stomach, radiating south.
Beside us, a woman clears her throat and I jump, unaware that I’ve completely lost track of where I am. Seth’s jaw tenses perceptibly when he shifts his gaze to her. The girl is blonde and beautiful, definitely supermodel material. Her tight blue dress clings perfectly to her build and accentuates her medium sized fake boobs. Yep. She’s definitely here for him. She bats her long, black eyelashes at him, but even I can see the blue eyes that glower at him from underneath them. I look at Seth, but he doesn’t remove his hand from my hip and now that she’s here I decide it’s making me uncomfortable. I pry his fingers from my hip and he drops his hand back to his side. I turn away from them and try my hardest to appear casual as I stroll out of that section. He speaks in a low tone to the girl and she replies in a voice that is so winey and sugary it makes me nauseous. My casual steps turn fast as I move my legs as fast as they’ll go—without calling it running—all the way to my dad’s office. Once I’m there, I close the door and lean against it. Never in a million years would I have thought Dad’s creepy MMA shrine office would bring me comfort. I feel pressure on my hip, like his hand is still there and it’s radiating pleasure through my entire being. I close my eyes and take a few deep breaths. When I regain my composure, I make my way over to the window. Seth is walking toward the shower room with his clothes in his hand and the girl is leaving the gym with lines of mascara running down her face.
Poor girl.
I truly feel sorry for her and the one that came in for him yesterday. I never want to be one of those girls. Does he even make it clear beforehand that he doesn’t want anything to do with them after sex—assuming that they’ve even had sex? I shake my head. Of course he’s had sex with every girl that has come in for him so far. Seth seems like a very sexual person and probably has a sexual appetite that I would never be able to sate. I fall into my dad’s chair and place my feet on his big, oak desk. I ponder what I’m going to do tonight when I leave here. Selena isn’t going to want to sit around watching movies again. Even last night she was finding it difficult to sit in one place. I normally spend my nights waiting for Blade or with Blade. We usually watch movies and cook together. Sometimes, we’d play cards or a board game… I realize I’m stuck in a comfort zone—a routine. The thought of going home to nothing terrifies me. It makes me anxious and so I decide to do something completely uncharacteristic of me. I can’t break my ‘Blade routine’ at home by myself. I need to go out. I pull my phone out of my pocket and clear all the missed calls from Blade off my notifications bar. Then, I text Selena.