She, at least, had been sagacious enough to find out my secret OHAPTEB, XXVII KINGSLEY.

THE fiendish suggestion of the mother, against the purity of her own

child, almost divested me, for the moment, of my own rancor--almost

deprived me of my suspicions! Could anything have been more

thoroughly horrible and atrocious! It certainly betrayed how deep

was the malignant hatred which she had ever borne to myself, and

of which her daughter was now required to bear a portion. What a

volume of human depravity was opened on my sight, by that single

utterance of this wretched mother. Guilt and sin! ye are, indeed,

the masters everywhere! How universal is your dominion! How

ye rage--how ye riot among souls, and minds, and fancies--never

utterly overthrown anywhere--busy always--everywhere--sovereign in

how many hapless regions of the heart! Who is pure among men? Who

can be sure of himself for a day--an hour? Precious few! None,

certainly, who do not distrust their own strength with a humility

only to be won from prayer--prayer coupled with moderate desires,

and the presence of a constant thought, which teaches that time is

a mere agent of eternity, and he who works for the one only, will

not even be secure of peace during the period for which he works.

Truly, he who lives not for the future is the very last who may

reasonably hope to enjoy the blessings of the present.

But this was not the season, nor was mine the mood, for moral

reflections of any sort. My secret was known! That was everything.

When the conduct of William Edgerton had become such, as to awaken

the notice of third persons, I was justified in exacting from him

the heavy responsibility he had incurred. The vague, indistinct

conviction had long floated before my mind, that I would

be required to take his life. The period which was to render this

task necessary, was that which had now arrived--when it had been

seen by others--not interested like myself--that he had passed

the bounds of propriety. Of course, I was arguing in a circle,

from which I should have found it impossible to extricate myself.

Thousands might have seen that I was jealous, without being able to

see any just cause for my jealousy. It was, however, quite enough

for a proud spirit like my own, that its secret fear should be

revealed. It did not much matter, after this, whether my suspicions

were, or were not causeless. It was enough that they were known--that

busy, meddling women, and men about town, should distinguish me with

a finger--should say: "His wife is very pretty and--very charitable!"

"Ha! ha! ha!"

I, too, could laugh, under such musings, and in the spirit of Mrs.

Delaney--late Clifford.

"Ha! ha! ha!" The street echoed, beneath the windows of that reputable

lady, with my involuntary, fiendish laughter. I stood there--and

the music rang through my senses like the cries of exulting demons.

She was there--of my wife the thoughts ran thus, she was there,

whirling, perchance, in the mazes of that voluptuous dance, then

recently become fashionable among us; his arm about her waist--her

form inclining to his, as if seeking support and succor--and both

of them forgetting all things but the mutual intoxication which

swallowed up all things and thoughts in the absorbing sensuality

of one! Or, perhaps, still apart, they sat to themselves--her

ear fastened upon his lips--her consciousness given wholly to his

discourse; and that discourse!--"Ha! ha! ha!"--I laughed again,

as I hurried away from the spot, with gigantic strides, taking the

direction which led to my own lonely dwelling.




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