His eyes softened and his hand touched my throat gently. He murmured as his thumb rubbed against me, “They already have.”
“What do you mean?”
Moving closer, he rested his forehead against mine. “I’ve been protecting you since I joined the Mauricio family. You were why I joined them in the first place.”
What? I—what? My eyes implored him for further explanation, but I couldn’t speak.
He grinned to himself and moved to press a kiss at the corner of my mouth. He didn’t move away like he had before. He stayed there and I felt his tongue brush against my mouth. “Those men were hunting you down after they killed AJ. They wanted his family wiped out. I killed them and then I went to Mauricio. Your safety was part of my condition to join his family. You will always be safe. That’s been my first priority, even over the family itself. My elders know that. Anything I do for you will always be cleared with my family.”
But—I couldn’t think. What he said—it didn’t make sense. None of it made sense. He had been protecting me this whole time? But—
He pressed a kiss to my cheek and sighed. His hand trailed down my arm in a caress. “I tried to keep you safe. I wanted you to live your life free, but when you came to me, I couldn’t allow you that freedom anymore. You have to be with me. You have to stay with me and let the men know where you are at all times. I can’t risk the chance that Franco might go against his family and take you without their approval. He’s crazy enough to do that. And if he does, if he gets through my men,” he shuddered against me. His arms tightened their hold on me. “I need you safe. I need to be able to contact you at all times.”
I nodded and flinched at the same time.
“What’s wrong?”
I couldn’t tell him. I didn’t even know. A storm erupted inside of me and as he explained more and more, the storm spread throughout me. Then I started to break down. I couldn’t understand all of it, not the fullest extent, so I clung to the bits that made sense to me. I needed to stay with him. Franco Dunvan could still come after me. I needed Carter. That made sense to me so that’s what I held onto.
“Emma.”
I looked up as some of the panic started to subside. I could breathe again. I could think. But, my heart started to thump in my chest. His hand rested there, between my br**sts, and my heart doubled its pace. I choked out, “I won’t hide anymore. I understand.”
“You do?”
“Yes.”
Then he sighed and his forehead dropped back to mine.
I couldn’t leave, not even if I wanted to, but I stopped thinking there. I couldn’t think about the possibility that I was starting to not want to leave. I distracted myself and asked, “What about Mallory?”
He frowned. “What about her?”
“What do they know about her?”
He tensed again. “I have someone on the inside. He said they don’t know much about her, but they know Jeremy had a girlfriend and they’re looking for her.”
“What if he had lots of girlfriends?”
“He did, but they know there was a girl he saw on a regular basis.”
A lightbulb turned on. “Do they know her name?”
“Not yet.”
My chest tightened as he held something back, and then I knew. My heart grew heavy. “But they will, won’t they?”
He nodded. “I’m sorry, Emma.”
“How long do you think?”
He gave me a sad smile. “I don’t know. I don’t think it’ll be too much longer before they find Mallory.”
A sob hitched in my throat. “Are they going to hurt her?”
He didn’t respond.
I knew my answer.
Then he lifted me into his arms again, but this time his embrace was for comfort. He brushed some hair from my forehead. “They might let her live if she gives you up.”
I couldn’t speak. The pain was too much. For the first time, I couldn’t believe that I hoped for my roommate and best friend to stab me in the back. Then she would be safe. Jeremy wouldn’t be able to continue to hurt her anymore. I nodded. I was okay with that, if it meant she would be safe.
“Carter.”
His arms tightened around me. “Yeah?”
“Would you sleep with me?”
“Of course.” But as he carried me from the room, he didn’t go to my room. He took me to his. The sun had started to rise so his room had some light inside, but I didn’t look around. I kept my eyes closed as he placed me under the covers and slid behind me. He curled me back into his arms. “When do you have to wake up?”
“Eight o’clock.” But it didn’t matter. I never fell asleep, neither did he.
When his alarm went off an hour later, I rose from the bed and got ready for work. Carter handed me coffee and then we went to the car. He rode with me to work and squeezed my hand when we arrived. Mike, or a look-alike, opened the door for me, but I didn’t get out. I stayed in the car for another minute. No one said a word. The door was held open, waiting for me, and then as my heart sank, I started to go.
Carter pressed a kiss to the corner of my mouth before I went. A tear fell from my eye, but he brushed it away. As I left, I knew that my entire life had changed and this was the first time that I accepted it.
CHAPTER TWELVE
The rest of my week turned into a routine. I barely saw Mr. Hudson, which was fine with me, and worked almost solely with Theresa on the new project. We took our breaks and lunches together. By the end of the week she was quickly becoming a friend, which seemed like a good thing when I stopped receiving text messages from Amanda. Theresa and I went to the café for bagels one morning and Amanda was working. She never made eye contact with me and, as I watched her, I saw there were bags underneath her eyes. I wondered if something had happened to Mallory, but I couldn’t ignore Carter’s warning. There was no going back. It was best for everyone that I stepped away from my old friends, best for them and for myself.