“We need all of you to back up.”
She knew the police officer was right, that she’d be safer farther back. It wasn’t fair for her to expect Gabe to be safe if she wasn’t doing the same thing.
A few minutes later, when they were almost a full block away from the fire, she saw Gabe’s truck double-parked on the corner. Pushing her way through the crowd, she pressed her hand against the cool metal of his door. Realizing he’d left it unlocked, she opened the door and climbed inside.
His truck smelled like him, clean and smoky all at the same time. Her hands were tight on the steering wheel as she stared up at the black smoke spiraling into the air, forming clouds of ash in the previously blue sky.
Her brain was stuck on Pause, on a far-too-vivid mental picture of Gabe surrounded by flames, just the way he’d looked the first time she’d met him in her burning apartment building.
Those visions had started to fade during the past months, but now she was bombarded with them one after the other. Looking up and seeing him gesturing for her to get out of the tub, to follow him through her apartment to the stairs. How strong, how steady he’d been as he’d helped her and Summer get to safety.
And yet, even though they all could have been killed and Gabe had ended up in the hospital after the beam fell on him, she knew deep in her core that everything he’d done—everything he’d asked of her that horrible afternoon—had been as safe as it could possibly be.
Gabe hadn’t been running around or freaking out. He’d been determined. Smart. And his clear-headed approach to firefighting was the reason she and Summer were alive.
The epiphany hit her, so hard and fast she wondered how she could possibly have been so blind all this time, blind even in his apartment when she’d been on the verge of declaring her love to him. She’d still been so caught up in the prospect of danger, in thinking he was going to take unwarranted risks and end up dead.
Of course Megan had known, early on, that Gabe was different from David. Her husband had been an adrenaline junkie. He’d thrived on risk and he’d never thought beyond those thrills, not even after he’d become a husband and father. Yes, while she knew that Gabe thrived on the excitement of his job, she knew he wasn’t in it just for the risk, for no other reason than to see how far he could push himself this time.
For Gabe, being a firefighter was about so much more than the thrill of putting out fires. It was about helping people and being an important part of the community.
If anyone could work a dangerous job safely, it was Gabe. There were no guarantees for any of them about getting sick or being in an accident. But if she’d been able to look past her fears, Megan knew she would have realized all of this long before now—that he loved them too much to ever purposely put himself in the path of foolish danger like David had done so many times.
So many things clicked into place for Megan in that moment. She hadn’t wanted Summer to turn what had almost happened to them in the apartment fire into a fear that she’d take forward with her in her life. She wanted her daughter to be fearless, but smart, too. She didn’t want Summer to hide her light, didn’t want her to shy away from taking intelligent risks.But even though she understood that kids learned by example, those things were exactly what Megan had done. Until Gabe came along and forced her to face the truth of who she really was.
His love gave her the courage to take risks again.
Now, even though she wasn’t close enough to the buildings to see if any of the firefighters coming in and out could be the man she loved, sitting in his truck, she felt better just being this close to him.
* * *
It wasn’t an easy fire to take down, but several hot, dirty hours later, Gabe was satisfied with his work, with what all of the crews had accomplished in Chinatown. The gas leak hadn’t turned into something worse, and while the store owners were going to need to deal with their insurance companies to replace their inventory, the fire had been beaten down before it could demolish everything. A few new front walls and windows would take care of most of the structural work.
He had removed his mask and turnout coat by the time he was halfway down the block. Already, his mind was back to Megan. To what she’d been about to tell him when the call had come in.
And the fear in her eyes when he’d promised to come back safely from the fire and she hadn’t let herself believe him.
His truck was right where he’d left it, and he was just about to pull off his turnout pants and throw them, along with the rest of his gear, into the bed, when he got the best surprise of his life.
Within seconds, Megan was out of the driver’s seat and jumping straight into his arms, her legs wrapped around his hips, her arms around his neck.
“Thank God, you’re okay.” She kissed him, fast and hard, once, then twice, then three times as if she could hardly believe he was there.
“I’m just fine, sweetheart,” he told her when she let him up for air, but he didn’t let her go, loving the way she felt in his arms.
She was kissing him on his mouth, on his cheeks, on his nose, his eyelids, everywhere her lips could reach.
He knew how scared she must have been, enough that she’d come to the site of the fire to keep watch over him.
“I’m so sorry I acted like that when you got the fire call.” Her words were falling so fast, he couldn’t interrupt. “I’m sorry for the way I acted that first time we made love in the hotel, the way I begged you to love me, then threw you out because I was so torn. For so many years I’ve been putting up walls, big thick bars, around my heart. But even then I knew that trying to control the wild in you would be like trapping you inside that prison with me. So I told myself I needed to let you go for both of us.” Tears slid down her cheek, one after the other. “But I can’t let you go.”