“Speaking from experience, Fee?” Katie asked.
“I learned I’m better off getting myself off with a vibrator than with a guy.” When the pause lingered too long, she smirked at Katie. “So if you don’t score a birthday fuck tonight, my gift will come in very handy.”
• • •
TWO hours into the party, the booze was half gone and the house was packed.
Since Molly had spent most of her time restocking food and drinks, she shouldn’t have noticed Deacon in the corner, watching her from the shadows. But she did.
Just pretend you don’t see him.
That was lame.
Then storm up to him, slap him across the face, and walk off.
That was mean.
He deserves it.
While she debated a course of action, Deacon acted.
He stopped before her only when she held her hand up to keep him from coming closer. “You weren’t invited to this party.”
“So? I knew you’d be here, so I crashed it.”
“You always do what you want and damn the consequences?”
“Only when the stakes are as high as they are with you.”
Don’t fall for his lines.
“We need to talk.”
“No, we don’t. Go home, Deacon.” She turned and started to walk away.
“Molly,” he said her name sharply.
She hated that his tone immediately had her looking at him.
Keep walking and don’t look back.
“Don’t.”
“Don’t what?”
“Shut down.”
“If anyone is shut down, Deacon, it’s you.” Against her better judgment, she retorted, “While I understand you have reasons for keeping secrets, I don’t have to like it, let alone accept that’s part of the deal with you.”
“Don’t be like this.”
“Be what? Rational? I don’t know why I ever thought this would . . .” Molly looked away. “Your past isn’t the biggest—or even the only—hurdle between us, Deacon. You know that. Now I know that. We shouldn’t have pretended otherwise.”
“Molly. Babe. Look at me.”
The instant their eyes met, she felt the pull between them. And he knew she still felt it.
“One hour. Give me one hour to tell you everything. No bullshit. No holding back.”
Don’t give in.
“If you want to walk away after that, I won’t stop you.”
She felt herself caving. If nothing else, this might give her closure. “All right. Tomorrow at eleven. At Snooze.”
Deacon shook his head. “Not in public. And it has to be tonight.”
“Where?”
“At the dojo.”
She needed to be in a place where she felt confident and in control. She shook her head. “At my office. I’ll meet you there in an hour.”
Deacon watched her very carefully. “You’ll really be there?”
“You worried I’ll stand you up like you did to me?” When he didn’t respond, she said, “I’m not a ‘paybacks are a bitch’ bitch. If you don’t know that about me, Deacon, maybe we should just forget this—”
“No.” Then Deacon’s hands were gently framing her face. “I’m fucking this up. Story of my goddamn life. Just . . . please. Give me a chance.”
The cool detachment she expected to see in his eyes wasn’t there. She could feel his arms shaking and he didn’t try to hide it.
“I’ll be there.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
DEACON drove his motorcycle to Hardwick Designs and parked it in the alley next to the back door. Then he walked around the block—twice—looking for Molly’s car.
No sign of it.
You fucked this up, played on loop in his head.
When he stopped at the main office door and didn’t see lights on inside, he had a very real fear that Molly hadn’t shown up.
Fuck. Was he so far gone with wanting her that he’d drunk himself into a stupor and was dreaming he’d crashed Katie’s birthday party so he could talk to Molly?
No. He’d really been there. So had she. He’d watched her for an hour before she’d noticed him.
And he hadn’t imagined the flash of pleasure in her eyes at seeing him. It’d been brief, but it’d been there. So he had the foolish hope that all wasn’t lost with her.
Still, he held his breath when he pushed on the door. It opened, the bell jangling to announce his arrival.
Molly wasn’t waiting for him, but he heard her rustling around in the back.
Probably looking for her Taser.
The sick thing was? He’d let her tase him if it’d start them talking again.