Larkin guided a pale, trembling Carla to the chair opposite his desk. “She doesn’t know who started the rumor,” the female sentinel told him. “I can’t find out either.”
As Carla spotted Harper, grief and longing briefly glimmered in the woman’s eyes. But then it was gone. It wasn’t even that she was trying to hide it. Instead, it was as though there was a part of Carla that possessed those feelings, but it was too small a part to make any difference.
“What exactly is the rumor?” Knox asked Larkin.
“Just that Carla gave Harper up to Jolene when she was a baby.”
Well, Jolene’s fictional version of events was a lot better than the full truth. “Nothing more?”
Larkin’s brows drew together. “Is there more?”
Knox looked down at Carla. “Much more. Isn’t there, Carla?” The woman gulped.
“Jolene’s pissed,” announced Harper as she sidled up to Knox, briefly glancing at Carla – the woman wouldn’t meet her gaze. “She’s trying to find out who started all the whispers. So far, she’s having no luck with it.”
“The mob has separated, but people are still unhappy,” said Larkin.
Knox glared down at Carla. “It galls me to have to protect you. In my opinion, you deserve to be fucking verbally crucified out there. You deserve worse. But I won’t have warring going on within my lair. That means taking steps to calm the situation.”
“I could make a statement that I’m not upset,” suggested Harper.
Larkin shook her head. “That won’t be enough; they’re upset on your behalf.”
“So maybe I could be seen to escort her out of here.”
Knox turned to Harper. “You’re not protecting her. She didn’t protect you. Did you, Carla?”
“No.” It was spoken so quietly, it was a true wonder that anyone heard it.
“In fact, the only thing that kept Harper alive during the pregnancy was a damn spell, wasn’t it?”
“Knox,” Harper cautioned. It was bad enough that people knew as much as they did. She didn’t want him blurting out the rest.
“You can’t have any idea how much I’d like to end you,” Know rumbled at Carla. “The only reason you’re breathing is that Harper doesn’t want vengeance. Oh, I thought about ignoring her wish to let you be. I thought about making you suffer the way you wanted her to suffer.”
“I didn’t want her to suffer,” Carla objected quietly.
“You wanted Lucian to suffer. Do you think that excuses what you did?”
“No.” Again, her voice was low.
A frantic knock was followed by Bray’s voice asking to be let inside. Knox wouldn’t have thought it was possible, but Carla’s face paled even more. Knox summoned him in, but Carla didn’t turn to face her mate. His hair was ruffled, as if he’d dragged his hand through it several times. His eyes were wild and desperate – most likely, he was desperate for her to deny what he’d heard; for her to decry that it was all lies.
Bray looked briefly at Harper before moving to stand in front of Carla. “Is it true?” His voice was like gravel.
Carla didn’t meet his gaze. “Yes.”
Bray’s jaw hardened. “How could you not tell me? How?” he demanded with a growl.
“I was ashamed, Bray!” she burst out, finally looking at him. Her words all came out in a rush. “I hate myself for what I did! She was an innocent little baby who hadn’t done anything to anyone. But I was hurting and angry when Lucian left me, so wrapped up in my own misery and pain that I wasn’t thinking straight. He was my anchor and the person I’d wanted as a mate, but he left me. My head was a mess, my demon was demanding the bastard while all I wanted was for him to hurt the way I hurt. A need for vengeance was the only thing keeping me going!”
There was a whole lot of truth in that, Knox sensed. If Carla had felt for Lucian even half of what Knox felt for Harper, he could understand how that would have twisted her so much inside; how it would have left her so overtaken by rage and despair that nothing and no one else seemed to matter. But to Knox, it would never fucking excuse what she’d done to Harper. Never.
“She should have kept you going,” insisted Bray, pointing at Harper. “She should have mattered more than vengeance.”
“Yes,” whispered Carla. “By the time I realized that she did, it was too late.” She turned to Harper. “I tried to take you back once.”
Harper would have snorted, except there was some genuine emotion there. “Only because you saw with me Lucian and realized that I was a potential weapon to use to hurt him.”
She shook her head. “I was jealous. He had you, and I didn’t. I tried not to think about you after I gave you to Jolene as a baby. But that day, I had to face that you were real. That I’d done something so very, very cruel. You used your ability on me. All the while, your eyes were changing colors. You get that trait from my baby sister, you know. She died. That was my fault. I pushed the swing too hard and she fell…” Carla inhaled deeply. “In the store, I saw you both staring at me, condemning me as I felt a pain I had every reason to feel.”
“So you just went back to pretending she didn’t exist after that?” asked Bray, disgusted.
Carla continued speaking to Harper. “I went to see you sometimes, whenever you came with Lucian to visit Jolene. Not up close. Just…from afar. I just wanted to see you.” She didn’t even seem to know why.