“Rachel,” I whisper, stunned by the sight of her. “You look beautiful.”
She turns around to face me and she’s smiling. “Do you really like it?”
The dress looks vintage with a lacy bodice and heart-shaped neckline. The skirt reaches down to her feet and is made of layers of creamy, almost transparent silk. Her ivory skin and red lips combined with her dark curls make her a picture perfect bride from a long forgotten era.
“I love it.” I try not to show the disappointment in my face as I think to myself that there is no way my dress will be that pretty.
“Oh, just wait until you see your dress, honey,” Jackie gushes.
“Yeah, your dress is way prettier,” Rachel says. “You’re going to flip when you see it.”
“Thank you for helping Chris with everything. I don’t know how I’m going to repay you. I hardly helped at all with your wedding.”
“Well, there’s not much you could have helped with, without figuring out what we were up to. And you don’t have to repay me, but if you must, you can always name your first born after me.”
It dawns on me that Chris has been asking me not to tell anyone about the pregnancy until after the wedding so I don’t ruin Rachel’s big day, but this is both my and Rachel’s wedding days. Why would he tell me to keep it a secret? I shake my head because I have a feeling Chris has yet another surprise planned for tonight.
“Come on. You need to get dressed,” Senia says, pulling me toward the other corner of the dressing area.
A dress covered in multiple layers of plastic hangs on a hook next to another full-length mirror. Senia and Jackie begin peeling off the layers of plastic until they unveil what can only be described as the most beautiful wedding dress I have ever seen.
The fitted bodice has a straight neckline that curves down to the waistline. Layers of silky chiffon gather at the waist then tumble quietly to the floor, looking almost dreamlike in their softness. The entire bodice is covered in a delicate lacy pattern, but it’s not actually lace. When I run my fingers over the bodice, it feels smooth and cool under my fingertips.
“Do you like it?” Rachel asks nervously.
“I love it.”
“All right. You make her look beautiful and I’m going to go see if the wedding planner needs anything,” Jackie says as she steps out of the changing area.
After I change into my dress, Senia drapes a smock over me so she can do my hair and makeup. She smiles as she works quietly.
“Wow…. This is it. I’m getting married to Chris.”
“Are you having second thoughts?” Senia says, cocking an eyebrow as she shades in my eyebrows.
I laugh at this. “What a cliché? Of course, I’m not having second thoughts, but I’m definitely having a moment. This feels surreal. Just six months ago I was… Well, I was convinced that Chris and I were over, and so was my life.”
Rachel grabs my shoulders as she stands behind me so I can see her in the mirror. “Sometimes you don’t know how much you love someone until you lose them. Jake and I broke up for a couple of months while you and Chris were broken up.”
“You didn’t tell me that.”
“Well, it’s not something I like to talk about. But he was on tour with Chris. Tristan was still being an ass and refusing to talk to them. And… I know Jake would never cheat on me, but I had never been away from him for longer than a couple of weeks. It drove me a little crazy and I broke up with him.” She sighs as she stares off into the distance at whatever memory she’s recalling. “He texted me every single day and sent me a postcard from every city they went to. He talked about Chris in some of those texts and, man, he was not doing well after you changed your number.”
I grit my teeth together to keep my eyes from tearing up. I don’t know why Rachel feels the need to tell me this right before the wedding. I guess it’s just her need to always be honest.
Senia winks at me as she begins dusting a fine translucent powder all over my face and neckline. “This is to make your skin ‘glow.’ Not that you need it.”
Finally, she applies my lipstick in a sheer nude color, just a shade darker than my lips. I rise carefully from the stool and scoot over a few feet to stand in front of the full-length mirror. In the reflection, I see the moment Jackie walks in and her eyes lock on my face. I turn around and she presses her lips together, but this does nothing to stop the tears.
“See you later, Mrs. Knight,” Senia whispers to me before she and Rachel make a hasty exit.
Jackie tilts her head as she looks at me. “Could you be any more beautiful?”
“You’re not allowed to make me cry. I just had my makeup done.”
“I don’t want to make you cry. I just want to look at you.” She walks around to examine me from all angles with a wistful expression. “I need you to promise me something.” She grabs both my hands and looks me in the eye. “When you go out there and promise to love Chris for the rest of your life, look him in the eye. He is no longer mine, so please take care of him.”
“I will.”
“I know.”
She blows me a kiss so she doesn’t mess up my makeup then she leaves me alone in the tent with no idea when I’m supposed to make my big entrance. I turn back to the mirror to make sure everything is in place and my heart jumps when I see Chris.
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Chris
Listen
“Wow,” I whisper breathlessly as I attempt to take in the sight of her, but I don’t think beauty this exquisite can ever be fully appreciated. “If your beauty were a song, you’d sell out a million stadiums.”
The left side of her mouth curls up in a bashful half-smile as she looks at the floor. I walk slowly toward her so I can take in every inch of her. Her face is serious now as she watches me come closer.
“You look incredible,” she says. “I love the dark gray shirt with the black suit and tie. I hate tuxedos.”
“Don’t forget my makeup. I think Senia did a pretty good job.” She smiles then suddenly her lips quivers as if she’s going to cry. “Are you okay?”
She snatches a tissue off the vanity and dabs her eyes to catch the tears before they fall. “I’m just happy. And…. I wish Abigail were here with us.”
I want to take her in my arms and tell her I wished the same thing about twenty minutes ago, but I don’t want to upset her even more or ruin her dress. We’ll have plenty of time to talk about Abigail over the next seventy years, or until she turns eighteen and decides to meet us after she gets all the pictures we’ll be sending the Jensens. Right now, I need to give her the one thing I know will get her out from under this dark cloud of grief.
“Claire, when I first met Abby in the hospital, I sang to her. I sang a lullaby as she lay sleeping under the heavy sedation.” I grab another tissue for her and continue. “She never so much as twitched when I sang her the lullaby, but as soon as I started singing ‘Sleepyhead’ her tiny hand jerked up and I put my finger in her hand. She held my finger through the whole song. That’s when I realized that there’s something inside her that has nothing to do with DNA that is connected to us. She will come back. I know that like I know you’re the love of my life. One day, she’ll come home.”
“That’s why she stopped crying when you sang to her at the lawyer’s office?” I nod and she nods. “She’ll come back,” she whispers as she tosses her tissue onto the vanity and takes a deep breath. “Let’s get married.”
“Rachel and Jake are about to say their vows. I linked my phone to the video camera so we can watch from in here.”
We huddle together and watch as Rachel and Jake stand on the altar while—“Oh, my God! Joel is the minister!” she cries.
“Yeah, he got ordained for the ceremony. I didn’t even know until today.” I grab her chin to turn her face toward me. “He wants to walk you down the aisle. Are you okay with that? Because if you don’t feel comfortable with that, I’ll walk you down the aisle.”
She grabs some more tissue for her eyes. “I feel so naïve. I actually fantasized about… Phil walking me down the aisle.”
“Fuck him. You have Joel and his mighty beard to give you strength now.” She laughs and I grab her arm. “Shh! They’re going to say their vows.”
She composes herself and we listen as Jake and Rachel speak words that make me feel a little self-conscious about my vows.
“I didn’t know myself until I met you,” Rachel says and Jake appears to be on the verge of tears.
I hope I don’t cry on the altar. Tristan will never let me live it down.
After they kiss, I tuck my phone into my pocket and Claire is covering her mouth. “What’s wrong?”
“I don’t have any vows written.”
“That’s okay. Just stand up there and promise you’ll never leave me again and I’ll be happy with that.”
“Well, I only have one thing I’ve been planning to say to you.”
“What’s that? Get lost?”
“Well, other than that. It’s something I’ve been practicing for a couple of years.”
“Practicing? Is it a song?”
“Nope,” she says with a sly grin. “You’ll see.”
I shake my head. “So you have a surprise of your own. I can’t wait to find out what it is.” I plant a soft kiss on her forehead. “The wedding planner will come here to call you in a few minutes. I have to go now. I love you.”
She blows me a kiss as I leave the tent and I immediately start writing a song in my head about today. I pull my phone out of my pocket to type the lyrics into my notes app as I follow the lighted path toward the tent nearest to the parking lot.
“Hey!”
I look up and to my left. Tristan is bounding toward me with an excited look on his face. He’s pulling double-duty as best man for both Jake and me.
“What’s up?” I ask as I finish typing and stuff my phone back into my pocket.
“I want to give you and Claire your wedding present before everything gets crazy. Do you mind? It’s in there,” he says as he nods toward the tent where I just changed into my suit.
“You just can’t wait to give me that blowjob until later, can you?”
“Nah, that can wait until later. And this present is much better since I’m not nearly as good at sucking dick as you are.”
We enter the tent and Tristan digs into one of the many bags Senia brought with all her hair and makeup tools. He pulls a thick envelope out of the bag and hands it to me. The envelope is addressed to Tristan Pollock with a return address from the County Assessor’s office.
“What the fuck is this?”
“It’s the deed to my house. I don’t want it anymore. Senia and I are moving to Chapel Hill so she doesn’t have to commute to school next semester.”
“Are you fucking kidding me? I don’t want your house.”
I try to hand the envelope back to him, but he steps back. “It’s done. I already gifted it to you. I already put a deposit on an apartment off campus. The house is yours.” He runs his fingers through his hair as he stares at the envelope in my hand. “I know you and Claire wanted a house with a good piece of land.”
I shake my head as I begin to see all the pieces of our lives falling into place. “You can have my condo. There’s still eleven months on the lease.”
“Are you serious?”
“As serious as I am that this is the craziest fucking day of my life.” I fold the envelope and tuck it into my back pocket. “What about the tour? Are you bailing on me?”
He shrugs at first then he nods. “Yeah, I gotta stay here. My mom will kill me if I let Senia have the baby alone.”