All her misery, at least, was getting poured into what she thought was a great story. She was sure to get her dream job. Just a few more days and she could start pounding the pavement. If the paper wouldn’t hire her, then she’d try to get a job with one of the local magazines. She knew she was a good writer, and she didn’t mind starting at the bottom, working her way to the top. She could do it, she was meant to report.
She’d half expected Max to show up at her apartment the night of the party, or the next day, if for no other reason than he didn’t like to be walked away from. She couldn’t believe how badly she’d wanted him to do just that. She realized she wanted him to show up with roses and confess his undying love for her, tell her she was the only woman he could ever love. She sounded like so many others, thinking she could change a man. The reality was that their time together had meant a lot more to her than him.
As Cassie stepped from the cab and looked at the familiar building, her heart started pounding uncontrollably. She took deep breaths to calm herself, but for once it wasn’t working. How could she face him, looking as if all was right in the world, when inside her heart was shattering? You can do this, she commanded herself.
As she stepped in the elevator, her feelings intensified. She was going to have a panic attack before she ever made it to his office if she didn’t get herself under control. She ignored the people around her, not able to make any kind of small talk. As soon as she stepped from the claustrophobic box, she headed to the bathroom.
She looked in the mirror, hating the amount of make-up on her face. She’d had to layer on cover-up to hide the shadows under her eyes, a dead giveaway to her sleepless nights. She re-applied her lip gloss and stared back at her reflection until she was sure she had an indifferent look plastered on her face.
When she was satisfied she looked fine, she stepped from the bathroom, and walked to the coffee pot. She’d need something in her hands to prevent them from shaking. In reality, she knew she was just postponing the moment she had to speak to him. It was early in the morning and the offices only had a few people moving about. It was unusually quiet, which was fine with her. She didn’t need witnesses to her humiliation.
She stepped through his open door and firmly shut it behind her. There he was, leaning back in his chair with his foot propped on his desk. He looked up from his computer, his keyboard resting in his lap. He was clean shaven, and as usual, his tie was cast aside. He looked good, way too good. She wanted to move the keyboard and curl into his lap.
“Good morning, Cassie. I’m glad you’re here. I was going to call and have you come in today. I would’ve called sooner, but got called away to Montana for a couple days. It was a disaster, and for once I’m actually glad to be back at the offices. We got the problem solved, though,” he said, as if there was nothing wrong. There wasn’t anything wrong in his world. Sleeping with a woman, then moving on to the next was a regular thing for him, she thought bitterly.
Cassie couldn’t get into a long conversation with him. She only had so much strength, before she couldn’t keep the mask on any longer. She reached into her briefcase and pulled out the papers.
“I wanted to give this to you. It’s not the finished version, but I’ve outlined everything going into the article. I don’t think I’ve broken any of the rules of our agreement,” she said, sliding the papers across his desk. Her tone finally registered that this wasn’t a happy meeting.
His eyes narrowed as he looked at the papers, then to her face. Please, don’t make this more difficult than it needs to be, she inwardly pleaded. She waited as he glanced back at his desk.
“I’m going to refill my coffee, can I get you anything?” she asked, needing an excuse to get away from him. She didn’t want to wait in his office. She took the other things she’d used from the office and set them on his desk. The act seemed to irritate him even more.
“You’re cup is full. You can stay here until I look through this,” he commanded. His relaxed state was over. He set his feet down and picked up the document, quickly scanning through it.
“I don’t have any complaints,” he said, after what seemed like forever. His voice startled her, as she’d been looking out the window. He didn’t look as if he thought it was fine.
“If you have an issue, I need to know now,” she spoke in the same monotone voice.
“I don’t have an issue with the damn paper. What I have an issue with is your attitude this morning. Why are you acting this way?” he demanded.
“I’m done with the article, Max. There’s no other reason for us to be around each other, any longer. I just want to finish this last bit of business and get on my way,” she said. She was proud that her voice didn’t crack. She was holding the tears at bay, but just barely.
“So, you’ve gotten what you want from me, and now you’re done. Everything that’s happened over the last month means nothing to you? I have to say, you’re not who I thought you were,” he snarled. If she didn’t know better, she’d actually think he was hurt. There was no way he cared about her. If he did, wouldn’t he say something?
“We agreed to a month, Max. I’m not going to make more out of our brief fling than what it was. I also don’t plan on being your mistress until you get bored with me, and toss me aside for your next supermodel,” she said, more emotion creeping into her voice.
Cassie hadn’t expected any protest from him about the process being over. She’d figured he’d be relieved to have her gone from his life. A nice, clean break. He wouldn’t have her stalking his every move, asking questions night and day, hearing stories from his family. He should be overjoyed they were finished, not angry with her.
“You did well, Cassie. You blackmailed me, got what you wanted, and now you can walk away with a bunch of secrets for the world to see. You must be feeling quite proud,” he mocked. His words inflamed her temper, which she was grateful for. He was acting like a victim. She couldn’t believe the irony of it all.
He’d been the one to hit her - he’d been the one insisting on taking care of her. Then, he’d had the gall to try and pay her off. She hadn’t taken anything from him, so he had no right to act like she was some money hungry bimbo, only out to get whatever she could from him. She held onto the anger, embraced it, and looked him in the eyes, knowing her own blue ones were cold and angry.
“It looks like you’ve gotten me all figured out, Max. I did get what I wanted from you,” she said with venom.
“I guess I do, Cassie. Was sleeping with me just another way to get more for your story? Do you plan on describing my preferred positions, or why not go further, and talk about my favorite places. Do you need some more pictures from my childhood? I’m sure my family members will gladly hand them over, since you’ve done such an excellent job of snowballing them into believing you’re someone else,” he spit. Cassie cringed from the force of his words.
She knew she deserved his anger. She was leading him to believe she was just as cold as him. But, the only reason he was angry in the first place was because she was the one walking away. He probably had another week of sex planned. Now, he’d have to go find someone else, not like it would be hard for him. She cringed as she thought of him in the arms of another woman. She couldn’t let her mind go down that path or she’d break down. Just a few more minutes and she could walk from his office. She wouldn’t break down until she was far from his building. Then, she promised herself, she’d allow the tears to flow.
“The article’s fine, you’re dismissed,” he said, his eyes never looking so cold.
“What?” she questioned. He’d switched his anger off so suddenly, she was momentarily unsure what he said.
“You can leave. We’re done here. In the agreement, I included at fifty thousand dollar settlement. My attorney will drop it by your place this afternoon. Sign the papers and we’ll be out of each other’s lives for good,” he said with no emotion to his tone. This was what I wanted, she told herself. She wanted to be out of his life. The shattering of her heart betrayed that thought, but she pushed it to the back of her mind.
“I told you I didn’t want any money,” she whispered.
“Quit playing the martyr, Cassie. I hit you with my car. I’m getting off cheap with that amount. Take the damn check so we can be finished with each other,” he said with irritation. Her very presence in his office seemed to be getting on his nerves. He’d effectively written her off. She was glad, she repeated to herself.
Cassie finally managed to get her feet moving. She walked toward him with her hand out for a professional final handshake. She had some honor, so she’d leave with her pride.
“Not going to happen. Leave,” he said, refusing her offering. She felt as if he’d slapped her across the face. She didn’t want to walk out as the cold strangers they were treating each other like. She wanted there to be a piece of civility between them.
“Max…” she tried.
“Did you not hear me? This conversation is over. You know where the exit is,” he snarled. He gave her one more cold stare, then looked back to his computer as if she was nothing more than a pesky fly on the wall. He wanted her gone.
Cassie walked from his office, almost as if she were in a trance. She kept the tears back as she got on the elevator. She held her head high as she started walking down the street. There was a slight mist of rain in the air, but she didn’t even notice it.
She kept her focus on walking, placing one foot in front of the other, to the rhythm of her breaking heart. Soon, she found herself running down the sidewalk. She didn’t know at what point she’d started, but she was trying to outrun the pain, the trauma of leaving him. She ran until her lungs burned, until her sides ached. She ran, liking the feeling of physical pain in her body. She needed more, to take away the aching in her heart. She ran for several miles, her feet aching, her body a mess. She didn’t care, she didn’t care about anything at that moment.
Max stood and paced his office. He was a fool. He’d fallen in love with a woman who was no better than the man he used to be. He’d been perfectly happy with his life before meeting Cassandra McIntyre. He’d enjoyed having a different woman on his arm every night. He’d enjoyed meaningless sex. He’d been satisfied by it. Then, she’d sprung into his life, and he could think of no other.
He wanted to chase her down, demand she love him. He was used to women using him for what they wanted and nothing more. He could’ve married countless times over, but what was the point? He wouldn’t marry a woman unless there was love, and he’d never thought he’d find it. He never thought he’d ever be with a woman who he wanted to share his life with. The sex was great, it was important, but it wasn’t the only thing. He couldn’t imagine going back to the way he was before Cassie.
He’d had a perfect evening planned for the two of them. He’d made reservations at the most romantic spot in the city. He was shocked to find he had missed her the last few days. When he realized she’d left the party without a word, he was furious, but after he calmed down, he thought her foot had just been hurting and she wanted to get home without being a burden. He could accept that. He was wrong. She’d only ever been out for the article and what it would do for her future. She hadn’t been falling in love with him as he thought.
