"And now?" he interrupted gently.
She lifted her head, with one swift glance upward.
"You will think me wrong, quixotic, unnatural," she acknowledged
soberly. "Yet I am not absolved, not free--this man remains my
husband, wedded to me by the authority of the church. I--I must bear
the burden of my vows; not even love would long compensate for
unfaithfulness in the sight of God."
In the intense silence they could hear each other's strained breathing
and the soft notes of a bird singing gleefully without. Winston, his
lips compressed, his eyes stern with repressed feeling, neither moved
nor spoke. Beth Norvell's head sank slowly back upon her arm.
"He took me with him from city to city," she went on wearily, as though
unconsciously speaking to herself, "staying, I think, in each as long
as the police would permit. He was seldom with me, seldom gave me
money. We did not quarrel, for I refused to be drawn into any exchange
of words. He never struck me excepting twice, but there are other ways
of hurting a woman, and he knew them all. I was hungry at times and
ill clad. I was driven to provide for myself, and worked in factories
and stores. Whenever he knew I had money he took it. Money was always
the cause of controversy between us. It was his god, not to hoard up,
but to spend upon himself. My steady refusal to permit his bleeding my
father enraged him; it was at such times he lost all control, and--and
struck me. God! I could have killed him! There were times when I
could, when I wonder I did not. Yet in calm deliberation I durst not
break my vows. Three years ago he left me in Denver without a word,
without a suggestion that the desertion was final. We had just reached
there, and I had nothing. Friends of my family lived there, but I
could not seek them for help. I actually suffered, until finally I
found employment in a large department store. I expected he would
return, and kept my rooms where he left me. I wrote home twice,
cheerful letters, saying nothing to lower him in the estimation of my
people, yet concealing my address for fear they might seek me out.
Then there unexpectedly came to me an opportunity to go out with
Albrecht, and I accepted it most thankfully. It gave me a chance to
think of other things, to work hard, to forget myself in a growing
ambition. I had already thrown off the old, and was laying ever firmer
hands upon the new, when you came into my life, and then he came back
also. It is such a small world, such a little world, all shadowed and
full of heartaches!"
In the silence she glanced aside at him, her eyes clear, her hair held
back by one hand.