“McLachlan,” I croak out and realize how sore and scratchy my throat is. I try to cough, to clear what feels like a plug but to no avail. “Can I have something to drink?”

Margaret comes to my bedside with a cup and spoon. “The nurse says you can have a few ice chips and progress to sips of water once you’re more alert.”

Jack Henry lifts the head of the bed and it dawns on me—I’m no longer lying with my head down. I panic, my hands immediately reaching for my stomach as I fear the worst. “The baby?”

My husband’s hand joins mine on my abdomen. “She’s fine.”

Margaret purses her lips while looking at Jack Henry. “You little shit. It’s a girl and you didn’t tell me.”

He’s in trouble now. “No, Mum. We don’t know what the baby is. I think it’s a girl so I call it a she to aggravate L—she’s leaning toward a boy.”

“Oh.”

Although I just had surgery, I feel more normal than I have in days. “I guess everything went well since they’re letting me sit up?”

“Yeah. Dr. Sommersby came in about thirty minutes ago. She’s optimistic the cerclage will hold because your cervix felt firm and is thicker than it appeared on the ultrasound. She said the bag of waters ballooning through the cervix probably had it stretched.” What a relief.

Margaret comes over to kiss me. “All right, kiddos. I’m going to step out and let the two of you have some time together. Can I get you something?”

I have everything I need right here. “I can’t think of anything, but thank you.”

Jack Henry waits until Margaret is gone before he hovers over me, his head against mine, and places his hand on my stomach. “I was so scared, L.”

I reach for his face because I want to feel it. He’s been too preoccupied with me and the baby to trim his facial hair. His scruff is too long to be considered stubble so it’s almost a beard. “I know. I was too, but for the first time in days, I finally feel like everything’s going to be okay.”

“Dr. Sommersby says she wants to observe you today and most of tomorrow. If you don’t have pain or contractions, she’s going to discharge you late tomorrow evening.”

“Omigod, what a relief.” I can’t wait to get back to Avalon. I can’t believe how much I’ve missed it. “I could’ve pushed through as long as I needed to but I must admit, I’m ready to get out of here. Four days of lying in this bed staring at these walls is a lot to take.”

“Babe, you’ve been a champ. Even the nurses have bragged on how well you handled standing on your head for days. You never complained once.”

Complaining would’ve only made it harder on Jack Henry and would’ve accomplished nothing. “There was no reason to. I was prepared to do whatever was needed for this baby and there was no other way of looking at it.”

“I know you would and it’s only one of the many reasons I love you so much.”

I shouldn’t but I want to know if my mom has checked on us. “Has anyone called?”

A peculiar look claims Jack Henry’s face and I can only interpret it to mean my mom isn’t concerned enough to call for an update. “I’ve updated Addison. She said to tell you she loves you and wishes she could be here. Emma called and wants you to know she loves you and is thinking of you and the baby. Chloe, pretty much the same—loves you, thinking of you.”

“But nothing from my family?” I bet she didn’t even tell Nanna and Pops. I know they would’ve called if they knew something was wrong.

“I’m sorry, babe.”

“It’s fine—she’s wrapped up in him. I’m used to it.” I guess I was stupid for thinking she might put me before herself, or him, for once, but it’s okay. Margaret’s been more of a mom to me this year than my own has been my whole life. The McLachlans are my family now and they love me. And I love them.

I’m discharged from the hospital for good behavior—no complications such as pain, bleeding, leaking, or contractions—but I’m given instructions to return immediately should any of these things occur. I’m to be on modified bed rest at home, meaning I can only shower and go to the bathroom. Otherwise I’m to do a lot of nothing while lying around. Dr. Sommersby says I may progress to routine activities after two weeks with one exception. No sex. My vagina is completely off limits so nothing is allowed within the temple. Strict doctor’s orders and one of the few things she isn’t lax about.

This is going to be a rough five months.

“Couch or bed?” Jack Henry asks as we pass through the kitchen.

“I’m sort of sick of the bed so I think I’d prefer the couch for a little while. Maybe you can sit with me and we can watch TV.”

“Absolutely. Mum thought you might need something comfy to wear the next couple of weeks so she brought some to the house this morning. Would you like me to get them for you?”

Margaret is so thoughtful. “Yes, please.” Mental note: Call and thank her for that.

Jack Henry returns with a pink T-shirt and a pair of white and pink pinstriped pants. Both are soft cotton and freshly laundered. “I can’t believe she washed them too.”

“She would do anything for you.” He hands the clothes to me. “She loves you dearly.”

My eyes fill with tears and my heart aches, but I don’t know if it’s the hormones or the sadness I feel when I think of how little my own mother cares about me. “I love her too.”

“She knows.”

I change into my new jammies and stretch out on the couch with a fluffy pillow under my head and my feet in Jack Henry’s lap. He’s rubbing my feet as we watch television and it’s one of the most boring times we’ve ever spent together. And I love it—just being with him in our home doing nothing. It’s absolutely shitastic.

I’ve been home from the hospital for a week and every day is pretty much the same. I go to bed with Jack Henry every night without sex. We wake up. He showers and goes to work. I shower and go to the couch. I lie there all day and when he comes in after work, we have dinner together on the couch. When’s it’s late, we go back to bed, again without sex, for another night of sleep.

I’m a very compliant patient but it’s killing me.

Poor Addison. I don’t know how she maintained her sanity for as long as she did, especially in that small apartment, but her jail sentence ended this week. The placenta previa is gone and she’s allowed to return to her normal activities. First on her agenda is coming to see me, and I’m glad because I have questions for her.




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