There was the sound of convulsive sobbing; and then, uncovering her
face, 'Lina raised herself up, and laying her hand on Hugh's bosom,
answered through her tears: "I wish I had always felt as I do now. Hugh, you don't know how bad I've
been. Why, I used to be ashamed to call you brother, if any fine people
were near."
There was a sparkle of indignation in Alice's blue eyes.
"You have no cause to be ashamed of Hugh," she said, quickly, the tone
of her voice coming like a revelation to 'Lina, who scanned her face
eagerly, and then, turning, looked curiously up to Hugh.
"I'm glad, I'm glad," she whispered, "for I know now you are worthy even
of her."
"You are mistaken, 'Lina," Hugh said, huskily, while 'Lina continued;
"And, Hugh, I must tell you more, how bad I've been. You remember the
money you sent to Adah last summer in mother's letter. I kept the whole.
I burned the letter, and mother never saw it. I bought jewelry with
Adah's money. I did so many things, I--I--it goes from me now. I can't
remember all. Oh, must I confess the whole, everything, before I can
say, 'Forgive us our trespasses?'"
"No, 'Lina. Unless you can repair some wrong, you are not bound to tell
every little thing. Confession is due to God alone," Alice whispered to
the agitated girl, who looked bewildered, as she answered back: "But
God knows all now, and you do not; besides, I can't feel sorry toward
Him as I do toward others. I try and try, but the feeling is not
there--the sorry feeling, I mean, as sorry as I want to feel."
"God, who knows our feebleness, accepts our purposes to do better, and
gives us strength to carry them out," Alice whispered, again bending
over 'Lina, on whose pallid, distressed face a ray of hope for a moment
shone.
"I have good purposes," she murmured; "but I can't, I can't. I don't
know as they are real; maybe, if I get well, they would not last, and
it's all so dark, so desolate--nothing to make life desirable--no home,
no name, no friends--and death is so terrible. Oh, Hugh, Hugh! don't let
me go. You are strong; you can hold me back, even from Death himself;
and I can be good to you; I can feel on that point, and I tell you truly
that, standing as I am with the world behind and death before, I see
nothing to make life desirable, but you, Hugh, my noble, my abused
brother. To make you love me, as I hope I might, is worth living for.
You would stand by me, Hugh--you, if no one else, and I wish I could
tell you how fast the great throbs of love keep coming to my heart. Dear
Hugh, Hugh, Brother Hugh, don't let me die--hold me fast."