He flinched like I had slapped him.
“I didn’t want her worrying, so I told her that we weren’t that serious,” I said, stumbling over the words.
“She actually said she thought I would hurt you?”
“She was concerned, mostly because of your reputation.”
His gaze dropped to the floor. Without him saying a word, I could see the emotions play over his face. He looked devastated.
“You have me wrong, you know that?” he said, brushing a hand through his hair. I was stunned to see he was trembling.
“My mom heard Heather might be pregnant with your baby.” There, I’d said it. And he’d heard me loud and clear.
His face fell, and his eyes searched mine. “You’re serious?”
I nodded. “Yes. she heard about it, and she didn’t want me to go through that pain again.”
“Who told her Heather was pregnant?”
There was no effort on his part to deny it. In fact, he seemed more worried about who had said anything to my mom. “I don’t know who told her. What is important is the truth. Please God, tell me she’s not pregnant.”
He dropped his hands to his sides and took a step toward me. “Of course she’s not pregnant.”
“Are you sure?”
“Jesus, Mandy.” Closing his eyes, he took a breath and released it. “I swear she’s not pregnant.”
“How do you know for sure?” I said, hating the fact that my voice cracked.
“I was careful. We used protection. I used a condom every time.”
And yet he hadn’t when we’d had sex.
The thought must have been written all over my face, because he shook his head. “You’re different, Mandy. You’re different from anyone else I’ve been with.”
I didn’t know what to say. God, I wanted to believe him. I did. And yet I had reservations. I had been knocked off my feet once before, devastated by the news of a pregnancy that had forever changed my life. “Condoms break.”
“Don’t you trust me?” he asked, and although I wanted to tell him I did, I realized in that moment that I didn’t.
Maybe I didn’t know how to trust any more.
I dropped my gaze to the floor. “I want to trust you.”
“Fuck,” he said, running his hands through his hair. “You might think I’m some bad boy type that doesn’t give a shit about anyone, but that’s not the truth. Yeah, I’m a bit skittish when it comes to relationships. I didn’t have the best examples. My mother, basically my only parent, spent her lifetime trying to get someone to love her. Maybe in some ways I’m like my father, a selfish bastard who is afraid to commit, but I don’t want to be. I just felt like I hadn’t found the right person…until you came along. I know you’ve been hurt. I get it. I do. I’m not that guy you think I am, Mandy. I’m not.”
I could see what it took him to say those words. I felt every single word pierce my soul. I had hurt this beautiful man who I had come to care for so deeply in such a short period of time. I had been foolish with my words, and instead of just telling my mom how I really felt, I had instead tried to ease her fears. Hell, maybe I had tried to ease my own fears, too. Use them as protection against news that had the potential to destroy me.
Feeling defensive, I said, “My mom just doesn’t want me to get hurt.”
He winced like I’d slapped him. “I would never hurt you, Mandy. I don’t want to be with Heather. Plus, if she was pregnant, I would have known by now. She’s not.”
I hesitated, not knowing what to say. I thought of Heather, of what she’d said about being with him recently, the things Kara had said to me, the concerns my own mother had.
He cussed under his breath and pulled out his phone.
“I thought your mom liked me,” he said, dialing a number and putting the phone on speaker.
“She loves you. She said as much when we were talking.”
He shook his head, clearly not believing me.
A woman answered. Hello? She sounded hesitant.
“Heather, it’s Brax.”
Even I was surprised by this move. He must be pretty dang confident he wasn’t Heather’s baby daddy if he was calling her in front of me.