“Vale, I didn’t know you were home,” she said, studying me.
“I’m just here today. I wanted to come see him. I should have called. But it was a last-minute decision.”
She seemed to be okay with that. Thank goodness. “I’m sure he’ll be happy to hear your voice. Knox was here a few days ago and read to him. I think he had more brain activity. He needs voices other than mine.”
I walked over to the side of his bed. “He looks good,” I said, not really meaning it. He was thin. Nothing like the muscular athlete he had been. It was hard to see him like this. I wanted him to open his eyes and look at me.
“Yes, he does look better these days. I think he’s getting ready to wake up soon.” The hope in her voice was clear. I hoped the same thing, but saying it was difficult.
She stood up. “I’ll let you talk to him. I need to go get something to eat anyway. Take your time.”
This was different. Very unlike her, but then, I wasn’t camping out in the waiting room anymore. I nodded.
When the door closed behind her, I looked back down at Crawford. So many memories. Where once I had thought it was all good things, I knew now that there were memories that weren’t so good. Like the way I had changed for him. Without meaning to. That would never be the same. When he woke up, I wasn’t doing that again. I loved him. He was a part of every memory I had of growing up. But I had to be me. And he had to love me for me.
“College is a lot like we imagined. I’ve made friends. You’d like them. You’d like everything about Bington. It was a good choice. I’m glad you picked it. Even if I hadn’t been on board at first.”
He lay there sleeping. So I talked more. “I miss you, but I’m finding a way to move on. To live. Life without you seemed impossible at first. I wasn’t willing to even try. But I knew you’d want me to. So I am.”
I looked around the room that had become a part of his life. His existence. “You’ll wake up soon. Things will be different. For both of us. I’m worried about that. Even a little scared. I’m not the same girl I was on graduation night. And I know you won’t be the same, either. This isn’t exactly what I imagined when we talked about growing up.”
Again, nothing. Just the silence. I stood there and watched him breathe until his mother returned with a bottle of water in her hands. Saying good-bye was easier than I thought it would be. My life was truly changing.
* * *
ONCE WE WERE back in the Jeep, Slate didn’t ask me questions about Crawford. Nor did he mention anything his uncle had said. I had actually expected him to do both, but he acted as if there was nothing to talk about. So I went along with it. He was quiet, and I could tell seeing his uncle so sick was hard on him. Leaving him had seemed to be the most difficult.
My parents were expecting us, and so was the rest of the family, apparently, because all their cars were parked out front when we pulled up. I had given my mom a call after breakfast to let her know we were visiting Slate’s uncle and Crawford, then stopping by to see them. She insisted we eat dinner with them.
Slate had seemed on board with the idea. The only one missing was Knox, who was back at Bington. He worked Saturday nights at a local radio station. I also didn’t let him know I was going anywhere with Slate. I had seen and heard enough already. I didn’t need his warnings.
“So it seems that the rest of the family will be joining us for dinner,” I said, feeling like this was a bit unfair. Slate hadn’t agreed to the whole family thing. “My brothers and I are close. They aren’t used to me being gone all the time. Jonah you won’t see tonight because he’s a Marine and on active duty. But the others are all here.”
Slate nodded and smiled, but the smile wasn’t as genuine as it had been before we visited his uncle. It had been hard on him. Again, I wanted to hug him and tell him it would be all right. But the truth was, it wouldn’t be, and we both knew it. His uncle D’s time was limited.
“It’s okay. I like the McKinley family members I’ve met so far. I’m sure everyone else is just as cool.”
They were. I loved my family, and after spending the day with Slate and his uncle I realized I was incredibly lucky to have the large family I had. No sickness had touched us. No death. Crawford had been the biggest tragedy we faced. And I still believed he would open his eyes one day.
“Okay. Well, the food will be good. More than likely one of my favorites. You can expect red velvet cake for dessert.”
“Momma’s baby has come home for a visit,” he teased.
I nodded. Because he was right. “Yep.”
I opened the door and waved him inside. “Here we are.”
The house wasn’t huge. It was big enough for us, though. The foyer had a coat rack that currently held two rain jackets, an umbrella, Mom’s purse, and her reusable shopping bags. The stairs were right around the corner leading up to the four bedrooms. One for my parents, one for me, one that Knox and Jonah had shared, and one that Dylan and Michea had shared. They all still remained the way they had been left when the others had moved out. Except there was a baby bed in Dylan and Michea’s old room. The girls had outgrown the baby bed, but it was waiting on the next grandchild.
Voices from the kitchen and living room were so loud they hadn’t even realized we were here. This was typical of my family. Everyone was always trying to out-talk the others.
“VALE!!” Maddy was the first to see us. She screamed my name and ran at me with her arms up in the air.
I bent down to catch her just as my mother, father, Malyn, and Catherine all came out of the kitchen. Michea and his fiancée, Hazel, came from the living room with Dylan.
“I didn’t even hear y’all come in,” Momma said, wiping her hands on her pink polka-dot apron that the girls had painted for her last Mother’s Day.
“I expect not with all the talking that was going on. Everyone, this is Slate Allen. He is a friend of mine and one of Knox’s frat brothers,” I said. Then I turned back to Slate. “You’ve met Dylan and the girls. This is Catherine, Dylan’s wife and the girls’ mother.” I then went on to make the rest of the introductions.
Dad shook his hand, as did Michea. When I was finished, Maddy decided to remind us that she’d seen him kiss a nurse. He was never going to live that down with the girls. Dylan had quickly hushed her up, and I smiled over at Slate. He needed to be careful where he kissed people.
The table was already set and I was sure Mom had put Catherine and the boys to work as soon as they got here. We had a long, wide farm table that my dad had made just after he and Mom got married. We filled it up now, and over the years he’d had to make two benches for either side to fit everyone.
Right down the middle was where the food was placed and we passed it all around to fix our plates. I scooted in to sit beside Maddy and let Slate take the end seat. “How’s your uncle?” my mother asked as soon as plates were filled and everyone was comfortable.
“He’s tough,” Slate said, “but he’s not getting better.”
Mom looked at him in a way only a concerned mother could. “Well, we are here if you ever need us to take him something. Meals, or just to check on him. Don’t hesitate to call. I was thinking of sending Dylan up there with a plate tomorrow. We always have so many leftovers.”