Shay had brought light back into my life, she’d revived my faith and loved my children, and they loved her back. Every minute I spent with her brought me happiness. Seeing the strides she’d made in her life made me proud of her. Deep down I knew that Katie would have loved her, treasured her as a friend. I sat for so long that I lost track of the time.
I heard the door open but didn’t look up, hoping whomever had come inside would get the message and leave me alone. I wasn’t in the mood to talk.
After a few minutes, I felt someone sit down close to me. Even with my eyes closed I knew it was Shay. She reached for my hand and laid her head against my shoulder. Not a word passed between us and yet I felt the heaviness lift from my heart simply having her close to my side.
I heaved a sigh as the ache of uncertainty returned. I would do my best to move on and follow wherever the road took me next. It was all I could do. The decision wasn’t in my hands.
When I finished my prayers, I raised my head, and Shay’s was lowered in prayer, too. She seemed to sense that I’d finished.
We left the church together. In the hallway between the sanctuary and the office, she paused and gripped hold of my arm, looking up at me, her face bright with unshed tears.
“I’m so sorry, Drew.”
Brushing the hair away from her face, I stared down at her, unable to disguise the love I felt for her. “Who told you?” I asked, surprised she knew the details of what was happening.
“Linda stopped at the café.”
I could only imagine what she’d said, and that irritated me to no end. I wanted to make sure Shay was protected from all this. Her faith was new, fragile yet, and this could destroy her. “You are not to blame, understand? I don’t know what Linda told you—”
Shay stopped me. “Linda said you would probably appreciate a visit from me this afternoon. She didn’t tell me anything until I asked her.”
“She did?” I had misjudged my friend. I’d assumed she’d gone to Shay and laid the blame at her feet, which would have been grossly unfair.
“Linda loves you like a son, Drew. You and the children mean everything to her. I realize I’m not the woman she wanted for you, but she respects you enough to do her best to accept me.”
I brought Shay into my arms, content to simply hold her, soaking in her comfort and her love.
“I talked to the prosecuting attorney about my brother this afternoon before I saw Linda. He’d just been assigned the case. Caden’s been given a court-appointed attorney. That’s all he could tell me at this point. I don’t want any contact with Caden, but I do want to know what will happen to him.”
The fact that she continued to care about her brother after what he’d done spoke volumes. I hoped that once Caden was sober and in his right mind he’d appreciate Shay and not see her as a means to getting him his next fix.
Depending on the degree of the charges against him and the jail time he faced, I would do what I could to get him into a drug rehab program. Caden was going to need all the help he could get.
When I returned to the office, Mary Lou gave me a sympathetic look. “An emergency elder meeting has been called for tonight.”
So soon; it was what I should have expected. Mary Lou told me the time. “Thank you,” I said.
I noticed Shay biting into her lower lip. Actually having Linda tell her what was happening was a blessing. It saved me from having to explain, knowing she would blame herself.
“I’ll stay with the children,” she assured me. “Do you want me to say anything to them about this?”
I shook my head. “Not yet. This meeting involves the elders who will vote first. It could all end tonight if the vote goes my way. No need to upset the children or give them reasons for concern.” I wasn’t sure Shay understood the inner workings of the church. It wasn’t necessary for her to know all the details. Having her support and love was all I needed to see me through this.
—
That evening, as I stepped into the meeting room, twelve elders awaited my arrival. Alex Turnbull sat at the head of the table. He greeted me stiffly and asked me to take a seat. He waited a moment and had his say first, outlining what he considered my shortcomings and how my behavior had an adverse influence in the community. He went on to claim that my relationship with Shay had brought undesirable attention to the church. The incident this morning had been a prime example. In closing, he stated that he had seen homeless men sitting within our midst during the Sunday service.
He was referring to Richard, who I’d seen slip into the eleven-o’clock service and take a seat in the back pew. I’d been amused and pleased to see him singing the closing hymn at the top of his lungs. Although he was in the far back of the sanctuary, I could hear him from the pulpit. I loved having him in church and knew in my heart that God did, too. He’d brought a couple other men in the last week and I had welcomed them one and all.
“Do you have anything you’d like to say in your defense?” Alex asked, after I’d answered several questions.
Every eye in the room was on me as though they expected a heated rebuttal. I had none to give. “No, everything you said is true, Alex. The only thing I would like to add is that as long as I am pastor of this church, these doors will be open to all who enter. Other than that, I have nothing to say.”
Alex Turnbull looked surprised. “Fine, then, let’s take a vote.”
From the smile on Drew’s face when he walked in the door, I knew the vote had gone his way. The relief I felt nearly overwhelmed me and I felt tears burn the back of my eyes. Until that very moment I didn’t realize how tense I was about the elders’ decision. Pressing my hand over my heart, it was all I could do to keep the emotions at bay.
Drew came to me and wrapped me in his arms, holding me close. “It’s good. Everything is good.”
My heart was too full to speak. I buried my face in his neck and took in several calming breaths, needing that time to compose myself. It went without saying that Drew was relieved, too.
Although they didn’t know what was happening that evening or why their father had an unexpected meeting, both children seemed to sense the tension. Sarah had been demanding and needy all evening and Mark had been withdrawn, which had become the norm with him. I worried about Drew’s son. He seemed to keep more and more to himself these days. I’d mentioned it to Drew once and he’d talked to Mark, but it didn’t seem to have done much good.
Sarah peeked out from the hallway, dressed in her nightgown. She’d gone to bed earlier, but she’d made one excuse after another to get up. “Are you going to kiss Shay, Dad?”
“Probably,” Drew told his daughter.
“Can I watch?”
“Absolutely not. You’re supposed to be asleep by now. You have school tomorrow,” he reminded her and tried to look stern. He failed and I could see that he was struggling to hold back his amusement.
“I’m not tired. Besides, I want to see you kiss Shay.”
While Drew put Sarah back to bed, I poured us each a glass of iced tea and set out a plate of oatmeal-raisin cookies that Sarah and I had baked that evening. Needing a distraction, I’d suggested baking, and Sarah had been more than eager to help. I’d asked Mark to join us, but he claimed he wasn’t interested.
Drew devoured the cookies. I knew he hadn’t eaten dinner and I strongly suspected with the vote hanging over his head that he’d gone without lunch, too. As we sipped our tea, Drew told me the gist of how the elder meeting had gone.
It seemed Alex Turnbull was the only one who had any overwhelming concerns regarding Drew’s competency to continue as pastor. The remaining elders had listened carefully to Alex, asked questions of Drew, and then voted. From what he said, Drew didn’t put up a lengthy rebuttal; he didn’t feel it was necessary. My name was mentioned but only briefly.
“I can’t tell you how sorry I am that this has happened,” I told him. I’d never meant for any of this to fall on his shoulders. He should never have become involved with Caden. From the first, I’d made it perfectly plain that Caden was bad news. I couldn’t imagine what had led him to seek out my brother.