“It gets easier, you know. Putting your heart on paper. I originally told Ridley I loved her through a song I’d written. I’m not even sure I knew what I was saying myself when I wrote it.”
“She loves you just as much.” Kay smiled thinking of Jackson’s wife, a sweet girl who’d become a close friend over the past year.
Jackson inclined his head. “He cares about you, too. I can tell.”
Kay pasted a smile on her face but didn’t comment. She couldn’t talk about Eli with him. It was his brother. Of course he would assume the best.
On New Year’s Eve, after having a few too many glasses of champagne, she’d made a list of things she wanted to change in her life. Her relationships with her parents were at the top of the list. Next was being brave enough to show Jackson some of the songs she’d written. She’d already accomplished that one. Jackson had done so much for her by giving her a chance and helping her at every stage of recording this album. She wouldn’t badmouth his brother to him.
The last one was to open herself up to the possibility of love. Eli had kissed her on Christmas Day, and just like every other time she remembered it, her body flooded with heat. She shivered thinking about his strong arms around her. For one shining moment, she’d thought he wanted her.
But then he’d left and gone back to his house in Northern Virginia the next day. There were very few things he could have done that would have pushed his point home more clearly than that. Throwing herself at him had only embarrassed them both. She had been caught up in a fairy tale for the past year. Elliott Alexander wasn’t interested in her. He never would be.
It was time to move on.
She looked out to the control room. Mac watched with sympathetic eyes. Did she really look that bad? Like a scared little girl afraid of what everyone would think? But she was scared. Scared that people would make fun of her, and worse, that no one would even care enough to do that and she’d just fade back into obscurity.
But fear hadn’t gotten her anything so far. Maybe it was time to try bravery on for size.
“No, I’m good. Let’s do this.”
Jackson started to protest, but something he saw in her eyes must have convinced him she was ready. He left the room and took a seat behind the recording console again. He put his own headphones back on and then gave Kay the thumbs-up.
When the music playback started, Kay closed her eyes and pushed all the negative thoughts away. As she sang the familiar lyrics, all the rest of it ceased to matter. It had been really difficult to sing such personal music at first, but now it was easier than she could have ever expected. This song reflected her experiences and her pain. Singing about it was second nature at this point.
She sang throughout the first verse and then added a few new riffs to the chorus they’d already recorded. Every time she sang, it got easier to be in front of an audience. To be the one that everyone was looking at.
“That was amazing.” Jackson’s voice came through her headphones again and Kaylee smiled gratefully. He motioned for her to come in the control room, so she took off her headphones and walked through the glass doors separating them.
“Come here, I want you to hear this.” Jackson moved over so she could sit next to him. He hit a few keys and playback started. Kay nodded her head to the beat as the familiar music came over the sound system.
“What you just did in there…” Jackson ran his hands through his hair. “We’re about ninety percent of the way there with this track. I don’t know how you do that. It’s almost too easy.”
Kay’s smile felt like it would stretch around her head it was so big. “So we can finish the song tonight?”
Mac nudged her affectionately. “We can probably finish two songs tonight if you keep singing the way you have been.”
Kay hopped up and headed back to the recording studio. “I’m ready if you are.”
It was time she learned to focus on the things in her life that were real. She might not be in love, but she had something almost as good.
Music.
CHAPTER TWO
THE NEXT AFTERNOON, Eli waited until the last client left the boardroom before he yanked his tie loose. He’d spent the morning in back-to-back meetings. Welcoming new clients was important work but tedious, and he was more than happy to get it over with.
“Please tell me I don’t have anything else scheduled?”
His assistant, Carly, glanced over at him with a sympathetic smile. “No, that was the last one. I don’t know why you don’t let George handle the new clients. He’s the vice president of the company. Why do you bother hiring executives if you won’t let them do anything?”
Eli scowled. “What’s wrong with having a personal touch? I like the clients to know that every contract will have my personal attention.”
Carly harrumphed. “There’s a fine line between a personal touch and being a control freak. Anyway, I’m sorry I had to schedule all the new clients on the same day. It’s just so hard to get you in the office.”
Which was his fault. If he hadn’t been avoiding her, he would have been in the office more lately. “Yeah, I know. That’s my fault.” He rubbed his temples.
“Are you okay? You don’t look so good.”
“Just a headache.”
She eyed him suspiciously. “Is this your way of saying you won’t be in the office this afternoon?”
“Yeah. But why don’t you just bring me anything I need to sign? I’ll be staying in Springfield tonight,” he added before she could pout.