She was putting plates on the table when the school bus dropped Jonathan off. It felt strange to have only the two of them at the table. They ate and then she put the remaining food in the refrigerator for Alex. Jonathan helped her feed and water the animals and then she took him to the hospital with her.
Alex looked up and smiled when they walked into the room.
“Good afternoon,” he said.
“Good afternoon,” Carmen responded, punctuating it with a quick kiss on his lips. “How is she?”
“No change yet, he said. “She’s been sleeping a lot. Did you sleep alright?”
“Like a log . . .” She made a face. “ . . . Whatever that’s like. Jonathan and I did the chores. We ate supper and put the rest in the refrigerator for you.
“Sounds great,” he said. “I’m bushed.” His gaze included Jonathan. “I’ll be leaving early tomorrow morning to relieve Carmen, so I’ll drop you off at Katie’s. I’ve spoken to the school and you can take the bus from there.”
“If you wake me up early, I’ll help you with the chores too,” Jonathan told Alex.
Alex stood and squeezed his shoulder as they turned toward the door. “Thank you, son. That would be a big help. I talked to the Sanders and they’re going to help as well.”
After they left, Carmen sank into the chair and picked up a horse magazine. Someone from the church or clinic must have been by and brought it for Alex.
Destiny woke several times during the night, but went back to sleep when she saw Carmen was there. Once she asked for daddy, but went back to sleep when Carmen told her he was asleep.
Carmen dozed in the chair a few times off and on until about midnight. By that time she was hungry and decided to make a deal with the night shift. She’d buy the pizza and have it delivered if they would bring her some. Win/win for everyone.
Alex arrived promptly at seven in the morning and they ate breakfast together in Destiny’s room. Destiny woke and ate a few bites before going back to sleep. That was their schedule for the next three days.
Instead of improving, Destiny got steadily worse. Carmen assigned responsibility for that to herself because she didn’t notice early enough that Destiny was sick. Alex said it might not have made any difference, and reminded her that she needed to think positive. That wasn’t easy to do when a person was physically and emotionally exhausted.
Sleep was not her friend during the day. With it came a host of nightmares. One morning she dreamed that Josh was standing over her, his brows in a knot above smoldering gray eyes. His red shock of hair stood up like a flame as he glared down at her.
“Look what you’ve done,” he growled. “God is punishing my daughter for what you did.”
Carmen woke suddenly and glanced around the room, half expecting to find him there. Was he right? Was God punishing Destiny because they had been greedy? Would god take Destiny from them – a trade for the twins? She had barely thought about the twins since Destiny went into the hospital. A rush of guilt accompanied the thought. Had the carpenters stopped working on the room?
She threw the covers back and went down the hall to the stairway. Climbing the unfinished stairs she opened the door to the new room and looked around. Like the stairs, it was finished to the point of being usable, but not completed. The sheetrock was up and mudded, but not painted. The hardwood floor had not been stained. Covers needed to be put on the electrical outlets and the windows still held their tags. Alex must have told the carpenters to stop working so she could sleep during the day.
She shut the door and descended the stairs. It was only two thirty in the afternoon, but she didn’t want to go back to sleep. Instead, she decided to use that extra hour to take a relaxing bath.
She was out, dressed and fixing supper when the bus stopped to let Jonathan out. They went through their evening routine and then left for the hospital.
When they arrived at the hospital, Alex was pacing. Carmen’s stomach squeezed into a knot.
“Is she still getting worse?”
He shook his head. “No. This antibiotic seems to be working better, but it’s strong and now she has a diarrhea. They have her in pull-ups now and she’s not happy about that.”
Carmen hugged him. “Did you have a rough day?”
“Not bad. Have you been listening to the weather?” When she shook her head, he continued. “It’s supposed to snow tonight. I’m thinking maybe I should stay here tonight, but Jonathan . . .”
“No, if one of us has to get snowed in up here, I’d rather it was me. You go on home with Jonathan. You look really tired.”
His concerned gaze ran over her face. “You won’t have any relief.”
She shrugged. “I’ll just have to take naps while she’s asleep. I can do it.”
He hugged her. “Call me if there’s any change.”
“I will,” she said, and kissed him. “Now go home and get some rest.”
The snow started shortly after they left and the wind blew it horizontal. The storm continued most of the night. Morning dawned on about three inches of snowfall and it was still coming down. Seven o’clock came and went without Alex. Finally her cell phone rang.
“Carmen,” Alex cleared his throat. “We’ve got some three foot drifts on the road out here.”
“Don’t worry about it. I’m fine here. I got some sleep last night, and Destiny is still asleep. The nurses were in a gazillion times last night to check on her. They can’t keep her temperature down. It’s been almost a week. I’m getting worried.”
He cleared his throat again. “She’ll be alright. Just keep thinking that . . . and praying.”
He sounded tired. “Alex? Are you alright?”
“Yeah, I’m just tired, and my throat is itching this morning.”
“You’d better stay in out of the weather . . . and get some rest.”
Less than an hour after the phone call, Destiny woke up in a fit of coughing. She started crying and holding her arms up to Carmen.
“I’m sorry baby,” Carmen said, unzipping the tent and reaching inside. You have to stay in here, but Mommy will hug you.”
Destiny clung to her neck, coughing and crying in turns. She was burning up.
“I wanna go home,” she whined. “Where’s Daddy?”
Carmen pushed the button for the nurse and cuddled Destiny. “Daddy went home to sleep. He’ll be back later.”
When the nurse arrived, she took Destiny’s temperature and said something about the doctor. A few minutes later they came in and got Destiny to take her for more x-rays. Carmen could hear her crying all the way down the hall to the elevator. Yet when they brought her back, she was asleep. The arm with the IV rested across her chest and the other hung limply. The nurse put her down in the bed and covered her. The doctor will be in to talk to you in a few minutes.
When the doctor arrived, he had more bad news. The other lung was infected and they had switched to yet another antibiotic. She was getting a little dehydrated, so they were speeding up the IV. The medication they were giving her to clear up the congestion in her lungs was making her sleep a lot, but they thought that was better than having her upset all the time.
After the doctor left, Carmen stood over Destiny, looking down at her tiny body while she slept. Auburn curls formed a halo around her pale face. Even the tiny rose petal lips looked pale. Carmen sat down and put her elbows on the bed. Hands clasped, she prayed fervently, asking God not to let Destiny suffer for what they had done.
Later she remembered that Alex had asked her to call him if there was any change. He would want to know, yet if he did, he might try to drive in on icy highways. There was nothing he could do. Still, he had the right to know. With a heavy heart, she called his number. When he answered, his voice was gravely.
“Alex, are you alright?”
“I’m alright. I think I’m catching a cold though. How is Destiny doing?”
Carmen hesitated. There was no good way to say it, so she might as well get to the facts.
“They did another x-ray this morning and the infection has spread to the other lung. They changed the antibiotic again.”
He groaned. “How are you holding up?”
“I’m fine. It’s just . . . I’m so scared.”
“I understand,” he said gently, “but try to keep your chin up.”
“I know. Think positive, and pray. I have been.”
“Have you had any sleep?” he asked.
“Not for a while. They said she’d be sleepy because of the medicine, so I’ll try to sleep while she is asleep.”
He sighed. “Well, hang in there. Help is on the way. Felipa called a while ago. She’s on the way.”
“How will she get here from the airport?” Carmen asked.
“I think they’re plowing the main roads. I heard they had the airport cleared for flights now that it’s stopped snowing. Things will get better.”
She wanted to tell him how much she missed him – how much she wished he was there, but he might jump in the truck and travel dangerous highways. If he was coming down with a cold, he needed rest – and Destiny didn’t need to be exposed to it.
“Well,” she said cheerfully. “You’d better get some rest . . . and take care of yourself.”
His laugh was low, and she could imagine his mocking expression.
“I’ll be fine. See you when the roads clear up.”
After their conversation, she leaned back in the chair to get some rest. Destiny didn’t need her at the moment.