Panic surged within me, desperate to get her out of the nightmare she was in. All caution toward gentleness left me as I began shaking her awake. “Wake up, Sofia.”
“No!” She screamed once again before jolting up on the bed in a sitting position, her whole body trembling. The last time I saw her this terrified was when she woke up to find Gwen murdered in her bedroom.
When her eyes finally settled on me, I was almost sure she’d scream from fright, so I was relieved when she gasped “Derek!” before throwing her arms around me. “Don’t let them take me!” she whispered into my ear, her embrace tightening around my neck.
Her words gripped at my chest. “Shh…it was just a dream, Sofia…no one’s going to take you away…not while I’m around.” My heart began to pound just at the idea of anyone attempting to take her from me. “Everything’s going to be alright,” I assured her. The way her body was shaking did little to ease my fears, even though I was desperately trying to ease hers.
It took a couple of minutes before she finally calmed down.
“Don’t leave me…” she pleaded, sounding childlike and unsure.
“I’m not going anywhere.” I pulled away from her embrace in order to take a look at her, but she clung on to me. “I’ll be right here with you for as long as you need me.” I put my arms around her, my palms running the length of her back in order to reassure her. It was the closest we’d touched for the past week.
I leaned back against the bed’s headboard before tapping the space in between us, coaxing her to snuggle against me. She obliged without hesitation. I was once again so keenly aware of her vulnerability, of how fragile she was. Yet at the same time, I was fully aware of her strength and her determination as a person.
“Care to tell me what the dream was about?” I asked after a comfortable period of time, just as she leaned her head against my shoulder. I had my arm around her and was softly brushing her kneecaps with my fingers.
“I’m not sure how to explain it. I was being pulled away by so many shadows. Away from you. Away from here. Waking up, all I can think about is Vivienne’s memories of Borys Maslen. What he did to her when he took her…”
My gut clenched at the thought. A lifetime ago, we owned a farm in a small village lorded over by the Maslens. When Borys first saw my twin, he took an immediate liking to her. She couldn’t stand him. Neither could I. When our mother died and I, convinced that vampires took our mother’s life, left to join the hunters, my father agreed to have my sister betrothed to Borys in exchange for a generous dowry—a dowry that was quickly spent on gambling, women and ale.
Vivienne never talked about what she went through in Borys’ hands—enough indication in itself that she must’ve gone through hell. I never asked. I didn’t want to know.
I, however, wondered why Vivienne felt the need to share those memories with Sofia. Why does Sofia have to know? I didn’t know what to make of the whole thing. The fact that Sofia would connect her nightmare to my twin’s darkest memories left me unsettled, but I tried to keep a brave face. “Don’t worry, Sofia. I would never allow you to suffer the same fate Vivienne did. I’d rather die.”
“I know.” She nodded. “But I don’t want you to ever die, Derek…especially not on my behalf.”
To that, I remained quiet. I knew that if I could trade my immortality to keep her alive, I would do it and I wasn’t about to promise her that I wouldn’t risk my life for hers, because should the need arise, I knew I would. Without hesitation.
“So today’s the day…” she spoke up after a short silence.
I pulled her closer to me, realizing how much I missed her. “Happy birthday,” I said and pressed my lips against her temple.
What she said next echoed my heart’s desire. “I wish I could stop time.”
She was aging and I wasn’t. Her every birthday would be a reminder that time was slowly, but steadily, pulling us apart. I wanted to beg her to become one of us—a vampire—but I knew she wouldn’t.
Perhaps she’s right. What we have is a sandcastle. Temporary, but beautiful and we can only treasure and enjoy it for as long as nature allows us.
“Our time together is too precious to waste like this,” I eventually said, unable to conceal the tone of resignation that came with it. I grabbed her hand and squeezed. “Come with me.”
Thus, though her nightmares still haunted me, I pulled her up, determined to make her birthday a complete dream.
CHAPTER 12: SOFIAI was used to people forgetting my birthday. The only time I could remember actually celebrating my birthday was when I turned thirteen. Ben treated me to burgers, fries and milkshakes before taking me to a party I wasn’t exactly invited to. To my relief, he stuck with me the whole time. He made me feel special that night—but even while we were dating last year and he was actively trying to pursue me, Ben was never able to make me feel as special as Derek did on my eighteenth birthday.
Our first stop, of course, was the lighthouse. Our secret place. Our private hideout. All the candles were replaced with new scented ones. Rose petals were scattered all over the floor. In the middle of the room was a mannequin. Hanging on it was one of the most stunning dresses I’d ever laid eyes on. The upper part was a tubed pink satin with intricate beading and beautifully embroidered sleeves. The lower part was made of light pink chiffon, its hem reaching just below my knees. A pair of silver, strappy heels were set on a wooden pedestal beside it.
I approached the dress tentatively, tracing my fingers over its beautiful fabric.
“You like it?” Derek asked from behind me.
I nodded. “It’s gorgeous.”
“Well, put it on. I’ll wait outside.”
I grinned, wondering what he was talking about. It’s not like you haven’t seen me undressed before. Then I remembered his promise to treat me differently than “all those other women.” I searched myself for what this made me feel. After we first slept together, I never told anyone, but I struggled deep inside. As I sketched his image the morning after I lost my virginity to him, I couldn’t help but feel a sense of insecurity and fear. I had just given him all of me. Just like that—in the span of a night. He was my first kiss, my first love…my first everything. On the other hand, I was only one among many women that came before me. Doubts of him losing interest in me and finding me unable to equal the more experienced women he’d been with plagued me.
Then he did this. He set me apart from everyone else. That night, as I watched him step out of the room in order to give me privacy, I couldn’t help but feel a sense of gratefulness toward him.
I got dressed as quickly as I could, not wanting him to wait too long. When I was done, I headed for the door and opened it. I drew a breath when I saw him wearing a black coat over his outfit. He looked stunning and refined.
“Hey, handsome.” I smiled.
He grinned, seeming to genuinely appreciate the compliment, before giving me a good look. “You look incredible.”
“Thanks to you.” I blushed.
He took hold of my hand, his every motion gentle and much like a sweet caress. He then led me to the middle of the room and gently placed his hands on my waist. He began leading me to a slow dance. He told me once that music was always playing in his head. This wasn’t the first time he made me dance to music that only he could hear.
I smiled, enjoying the feel of his hands on me. It was a balm to the yearning ache I’d been feeling for him over the past few days. Being in his arms was bliss in and of itself, so it was even more of a treat when he began humming a tune, allowing me to hear the music playing in his mind.
Just like every moment I spent with him, I wanted it to last for an eternity, but the song came to a close. He then uttered words that sent my brain into a tailspin.
“Marry me, Sofia.”
I froze. I guess I should’ve seen it coming. He was pursuing me. He wanted me. Why is this request taking me by surprise? Every fiber of my being was begging me to nod my head and say yes. There was nothing more I wanted than to be his wife, but what kind of life would he have with me? It didn’t make any sense for an immortal to commit his entire lifetime to a mortal such as me. I looked up at him, seeing the longing there, mirroring exactly what I felt.
“Derek…” My voice was choked and slightly broken. “I want to…you know that, right?”
“But you can’t…” he muttered sadly, his head slowly nodding to show his attempt to understand. His eyes betrayed the pain inside, however, and I wanted nothing other than to ease his pain. But I had no idea how to do that.
My grip tightened over his arms. “I’m so sorry…”
“Don’t be. I knew you’d say no, but I wanted to try anyway. I know that someday, I’ll hear you say yes to that request, Sofia.” He nodded resolutely. “Someday, you’re going to be my wife.”
You have no idea how much I want to say yes right now. A soft gasp escaped my lips when he pulled away from me. He kept on talking about marriage as if only he wanted it, as if I didn’t want it just as much as he did, but how could we take such a step? I didn’t even want to think about tomorrow, because the hopelessness I felt whenever I thought about the future always ate me up. I didn’t want to think of a future without Derek. I wanted to just live today. Marriage was a commitment that forced me to look ahead and wonder what would happen.
Confused, I stepped away from him and looked into his eyes, wondering what was going through his mind. I was relieved to see his melancholy fade away with one bright smile. He lifted his forefinger in the air in a gesture for me to wait.
He walked toward a small chest placed on top of a wooden desk in one corner of the room. He took out a square blue velvet box just about the same length and width as my hand. He brought it to me and opened it. Inside was a golden chain with a small heart-shaped pendant. I brushed my fingers over the pendant, marveling over its beauty. I really had no idea how to tell if a piece of jewelry had any worth, but my gut told me that the necklace he was offering to me was more expensive than I would care to know.