Thirteen
“This is such a treat,” Maryellen said, slipping into the booth across from her mother at the Wok and Roll, her favorite Chinese restaurant.
“Just consider it an early birthday gift,” Grace replied as she glanced up from the menu.
“So, how are things with you and Cliff?” Maryellen asked. She didn’t bother with the menu because she ordered the same thing every time. She really should try something other than the chicken hot sauce noodles, but couldn’t make herself do it. The small family-owned restaurant ordered the thick rice noodles from the International District in Seattle. Maryellen could slurp up those noodles every day, she enjoyed them so much.
Her mother set aside the menu and there was such a depressed look on her face that Maryellen was shocked. “Mom?”
Smiling was clearly an effort. “I’ve given up on Cliff,” Grace said matter-of-factly.
“You don’t mean that.” Maryellen reached across the table and squeezed her mother’s hand.
“I do. In reality, I don’t have any choice.”
“No.” Maryellen couldn’t believe it. “I thought you were going to fight for him. What happened?”
Grace told her about the night of their big dinner date. She’d since learned from the veterinarian, who’d come into the library, that Midnight had survived. Hearing this from someone other than Cliff only seemed to increase her mother’s discontent with the on-again/off-again relationship.
Maryellen understood Grace’s frustration. Her mother had been so hopeful about this dinner; it was going to be a new beginning for her and Cliff. And then the evening had turned out to be such a disappointment.
“It was more than Cliff dealing with Midnight. I understand the stallion was in a life-threatening situation. That I could have accepted. But Cliff had obviously forgotten he’d even asked me out to the ranch. He seemed so…indifferent. My being there meant nothing to him. In fact, he seemed grateful to get out of having dinner with me.”
“Cliff’s not like that.”
“Normally I’d agree with you,” her mother said, “but I was there, Maryellen. I’ve learned to trust my instincts and that was the way I felt. Much as I don’t want to believe it, I know I’m right.”
Maryellen hated to see this relationship end, especially since Grace had worked so hard to win Cliff back. Until now, Maryellen had found him to be thoughtful and sensitive to her mother—far more than her own father had ever been. “You mean to say that after two weeks Cliff hasn’t even tried to phone?” she asked, incredulous.
Her mother shrugged. “He left messages a couple of times.”
“Well?” Maryellen looked at her sternly. “Did you return his calls?”
Her mother’s smile was sad. “Olivia thinks I should, too, but I can’t.” She sighed so dejectedly that Maryellen yearned to hug her and reassure her.
“Why not?” Maryellen really didn’t understand this.
She recognized from the stubborn way her mother shook her head that Grace wouldn’t call him. “Olivia says I’m a fool not to, but Maryellen, you have to realize how demeaning it was, how awful I felt—it’s hard to explain. Sad as it is to admit, I don’t think Cliff’s capable of getting beyond what happened with Will.” She paused; she’d never told her daughters the whole story, but Maryellen had pieced it together. “As far as he’s concerned, I committed the one sin he can’t forgive. He’d like things to be different, he might even want us to be together, but something inside him is incapable of forgiving me for what I did.”
Maryellen disagreed. “You’re wrong. He wouldn’t have phoned if that was the case.”
Grace shook her head again. “I’m sure Cliff regrets what happened, but there’s no need to drag this out any longer. I doubt he’ll phone again and after some soul-searching, I’ve decided that’s fine.”
Her mother might have talked herself into that decision, but Maryellen didn’t believe she was fine with it at all. The very first time she’d met Cliff and seen him with her mother, Maryellen had felt they were meant to be together. “Do you remember when I was pregnant with Katie?” Maryellen asked.
“Of course.”
“I was convinced I didn’t need Jon and that I could raise the baby on my own. Remember?”
A smile touched her mother’s eyes. “You were so determined to prove it.”
“Yes, well…It was easy enough to think I could do everything by myself before Katie was born, but afterward…it was a different story.” Never would she have imagined that one tiny baby could be so demanding. Most nights Maryellen had only managed to sleep in twenty-or thirty-minute stretches—if at all. A rash of ear infections kept Katie up at night screaming in pain. Thankfully Jon had insisted on being part of his daughter’s life and wanted to share the responsibility of raising her. Maryellen had quickly seen that Katie needed him, and so did she. “The similarity, Mom, is that I was so sure about everything—and I was wrong. Maybe you are, too.”
As Grace began to reply, Elaine, the owner’s wife, came for their order and predictably Maryellen chose her chicken hot sauce noodles. Grace asked for Wor Wonton Soup.
When Elaine had left their table and gone back to the kitchen, the restaurant door opened and in walked Cliff Harding.
Maryellen leaned toward her mother. “Don’t look now, but Cliff just came in.”
Grace stiffened. “Did he notice us?”
There wasn’t time to answer. Cliff walked directly over to their table and smiled down at both women.
“Hi, there,” Maryellen said, raising her hand. “This is a pleasant surprise.”
He acknowledged her, and removed his Stetson as he turned toward her mother. “Grace,” he said with a curt nod.
“Hello, Cliff.” Her mother’s voice was calm, and she kept her eyes trained straight ahead.
Maryellen admired her poise in this awkward situation. She watched as Grace slowly glanced up and offered Cliff the scantest of smiles.
“There must be a problem with your answering machine,” he said. “I’ve been trying to get in touch with you.”