Sometimes Never

Hope’s lips form a smile beneath mine. “Like my boyfriend?”

Now I smile, nodding. “Or, you know, your boyfriend.” I run my palms down her sides.

She shivers and pushes her mouth against mine, kissing me gently. Finally. I growl as she deepens the kiss, my fingers gripping her ribs. I must tickle her because she squirms and pulls away. “No,” I complain. “Come back.”

She moves closer, but she doesn’t kiss me. She stares up at me. Her eyes are so pretty. Bright and blue, framed in those long, dark lashes.

“What would that involve?” she asks quietly in her whispery voice she reserves for the scary or important conversations. “Being your girlfriend.”

Holy shit. She’s considering it. I didn’t think she’d go for it. We haven’t even had our first date yet. I don’t bother to hide exactly how happy that makes me. I grin at her. “Well, I guess it would be like it is now, except, everyone would know that I’m yours.” I let my gaze pass over her face, suddenly afraid how she’ll take my next words. “And that you’re mine. I know how you feel about the whole relationship thing, but I want to commit to you. Which is so—it’s not normal for me. But I like you and I only want you. And I want everyone to know it.”

“That sounds like ownership,” she says slowly. Unsure.

I shake my head and sit forward. “Kind of. I don’t mean I own you. You would be my girlfriend. Nobody else’s. I wouldn’t own you. Just like...your...” I trail off because I can’t say love. I haven’t told her how strongly I feel for her. That would scare her off for sure. And I definitely am not assuming that she could love me already. I’m fully aware of how strange this all is.

“Heart?”

Our eyes lock and I can’t breathe. That’s so close to the same thing. “Yes.”

Hope tugs on my shirt sleeve, pulling me toward her. “Okay,” she whispers just before her lips meet mine.

And I’m the happiest I’ve been in six years. Maybe ever.

I can’t believe she said okay. I pull back, needing to verify. “Okay? You want to be my girlfriend?”

“Yes,” she says. She looks down at her hands. I notice they’re shaking. Closing one hand over hers, I pull her chin up with my other.

“I won’t push this if it’s not what you want.”

“I tried the no commitment thing before. It didn’t work out so well. I like you. And I like—” She bites her lip and closes her eyes. Without opening them, she continues. “I like that you want to commit to me. It makes me feel...”

Good? Happy? No, Hope’s never really had someone committed to her before. Reluctant? Scared?

“Safe?”

She blinks her eyes open and they’re glossy with unshed tears. “Yes,” she breathes.

Damn, she is breaking my heart and filling it at the same time. And I realize she will never have to worry about ownership because she thoroughly owns my ass. I will do anything, anything for her.

“So this is it?” She smiles at me and squeezes my hand. “We’re official?”

“Yes.” I feel like running. Or shouting. Or laughing really freaking loudly. But I don’t do any of those things. Instead, I pull her into my lap and kiss her until we’re both gasping for breath.

Chapter 24

Hope

Mason is my truck. I have no idea what happened, or how, or even why. I was just walking through my life one day and, BAM. Mason smashed into me. Into my mind. My body. My heart.

He’s filled every fraction of me. Every minute, of every day, Mason is a part of me.

Does this scare the living crap out of me? Oh, hell yes. But you know how roller coasters are really fun because they’re fast, unpredictable, and terrifying? Yeah, that’s the equivalent to our relationship. He’s impulsive and candid. His sense of humor is twisted, but he makes me laugh like it’s something I do all the time. Let’s not forget he’s so gorgeous he makes me liquefy in his presence. There’s also the little fact that he has a messed up past as well. He knows what it’s like to lose a parent. Above all that, Mason makes me feel protected. Like nothing, nobody, can hurt me. Sometimes I catch myself believing we can work.

That’s the truly scary part.

I don’t believe in forever. I don’t trust it. But I trust Mason, which means now I have a boyfriend. It means that I am through fighting my feelings. My mind and heart have stopped battling. The peace treaty has been signed and we are now a joined force.

I smile as he pushes away from his car and saunters over to Neko. I love the way he walks. Mason has so much confidence it shows in every move he makes. It’s like Park’s stage presence, only it’s all the time, in every single thing he does. He ducks into my window, flashing the dimpled grin that makes the muscles in my stomach squeeze happily. Before I have a chance to return the smile, his mouth is moving against mine. I lean back, tugging on him until his body spills through the window and lies on top of mine.

Mason laughs against my lips causing goose bumps to burst across my arms. The way his weight presses me against the seat is making my heart race. I swear, I think there is a whole army of gymnasts doing somersaults in my stomach. His hands move over me slowly until they’re both cupping my face, fingers splayed across my cheeks. He brushes his lips gradually across my collar bone, then over my throat and I am so blissfully happy.

“I don’t wanna go to school now,” he murmurs against my skin. “I wanna stay right here, all day.”

“Okay.”

Mason raises his head and his green eyes regard me dubiously. “Really?” There’s a distinct hopefulness in his voice. How can I possibly deny him?

“Yeah. Why not?” I say. He opens his mouth to say something, probably to list the many reasons why not, but I don’t want to hear them right now. I lift my head, his fingers sliding over my face and into my hair, and I trail my tongue over his lip. He accepts the invitation eagerly, nipping my tongue and pulling it into his mouth to meet his.

My toes curl. Literally.

A sound, somewhere between a moan and a cry bubbles up from my throat. Mason responds to this by deepening the kiss until I want to scream with pleasure. Nobody has ever kissed me like this. I didn’t even know anybody could kiss like this. But oh, dear Buddha, I know right at this moment, Mason was wrong. He does possess me. He owns me in every sense of the word. I am his. As much of me for as long as he wants.

A tortured sound escapes from Mason as he pulls away gasping. I stare at him, panting. “I want to be a good guy with you,” he says, his voice is deep and husky, and I shiver. Even the way he sounds makes my body want in a way I’ve never experienced. “But Hope, you are making it so hard for me.”

We both explode with laughter. “No pun intended?”

He nuzzles into my neck, burying his face in my hair. “Ahh. I want you so bad.”

I sigh. The feeling is mutual. I run my fingers through his dark hair, loving how the soft strands feel. “Maybe we should go to class,” I say reluctantly.

“Nooo,” Mason whines. “I’ll be good. I promise.” He kisses my cheek and pushes himself up so he’s sitting on the driver’s side. “So, where are we going?”

“I thought you wanted to stay right here?” I tease, batting my lashes.

“Don’t make me come back over there,” he says, slitting his eyes and raising one brow. Oh, cheese and rice. He is so freaking sexy. I pull my hair over my shoulder to get the heat off my neck.

“That’s a terrible threat. It’s like telling me you’ll give me extra candy if I don’t eat my dinner.”

A devious smile spreads his lips and he lunges sideways, grasping me around the waist, and lugging me against him. “I’m your extra candy?” He skims his nose down my neck and I can’t seem to answer him yet. Instead, I tilt my head, giving him free reign. His lips brush my shoulder as he inhales deeply.

“Sweet like candy to my soul. Sweet you rock and sweet you roll,” I whisper.

Mason’s arms tighten around me. “Good song,” he utters.

“Mm-hm.”

“I love when I discover something new about you.”

“What did you learn about me now?” I ask.

He clenches me to his chest and clears his throat. “This is the second time you’ve talked to me through song lyrics. I like it.”

“Hmm. But lyrics mean different things to different people. What if you’re interpreting my meaning incorrectly?” I shift so I can see his reaction.

He starts my car and puts his seatbelt on, gesturing at me to do the same. “Okay. Then why don’t you just tell me what you meant?”

“I like candy. I like you,” I say, smiling innocently.

He glances at me as he backs out of the parking space. “Some would say you have a candy obsession.”

I scrunch my brows. “It’s a healthy addiction. I am not obsessed with you. Or candy. Candy for me is, like, comfort. It makes me happy. Makes me feel good. It’s been my friend through some shitty times. I love candy—” What. The. Hell. Did. I. Just. Say?

The space between us feels smothering. I see Mason turn his head to look at me from my peripheral, but I can’t bring myself to look back. How could I say that? How could I compare him to candy and then say I love candy?

I can’t breathe.

Mason places his fingers in between mine and squeezes. “I love M&M’s. Hard outer shell, sweet and soft inside. They’re a vulnerable candy. I mean, they have that protective casing, but they’re still capable of melting so easily.”

“But only in your mouth, not in your hand,” I say, my voice raspy.

“So they claim,” he says.

I finally look at him and he smiles at me. “You’re always smiling.”

He shakes his head. “Only when I’m with you.”

I turn to my window, putting my hand out and catching the wind until it forces my arm back. “So, where are you taking us?”

“I’m just driving. Any suggestions?”

I think about it as I kick off my flip flops and prop my feet on the dashboard. We pass over the bridge taking us out of town and an idea pops into my head. “Keep going straight,” I say. “When you hit the first stop light, take a right.”

“All right. Are you going to tell me?”

“Nope.”

Mason puts the gear into park and looks out at the water. He shifts his attention to me as I open the door. “What is this place?”

“It’s The Pond.” I slam the door and walk toward the water.

“I see it’s a pond, but who owns it? Are we trespassing?” He catches up to me easily.

I glance at him and arch my eyebrow. “It’s not a pond. It’s The Pond. And I have no idea who owns it. Are you scared?”

He gives me a look. “I don’t scare easily,” he grunts. That’s the truth. “Just curious.”

I smile, letting my eyes blink slowly. “You know what they say about curiosity?”

“I’m not a cat. I think I’m safe.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure,” I trill as I lift my tank top over my head and drop it onto the grass, not breaking my stride. I don’t stop until I get to the muddy edge of the water.

Normally I wouldn’t be willing to wear a swimsuit, let alone my underwear in front of anybody, but this is Mason. He’s the only one I can be like this with. The only one that can look at me like I’m a buffet set up just for him.

I unbutton my shorts and slide them down my legs before I realize he isn’t with me. Turning around, I find him standing a few feet back, his hands interlocked atop his head, staring at me. I feel my face warm under his intense gaze.