Reason to Breathe

His mother was sparkling with her bobbed blond hair and bright blue eyes. She was covered in a fur coat and adorned with more diamonds than I’d ever seen on one person. She had soft, delicate features and looked very thin and breakable. She clutched a small black handbag that was sealed with more glitz.

In contrast, Mr. Mathews was a statuesque man, taller than Evan, but with strikingly similar features. He and Evan shared the same light brown hair and grayish blue eyes. His face was angular and serious as he stood in a long black coat, concealing a tuxedo.

I took a deep breath before approaching them. I tried my best to smile cordially while I was introduced.

“Vivian and Stuart Mathews, this is-

“Emily Thomas,” Vivian finished, holding out her hand. I tried to conceal the shocked look on my face, especially with being called Emily by someone I’d never seen before today.

“It’s very nice to meet you,” I said, shaking her delicate hand. Stuart remained still with his hands by his side, making no attempt acknowledge me, forget about shake my hand.

“Well, aren’t you lovely,” Vivian admired. “We never get to meet Evan’s girlfriends.” I knew it was coming, but my heart still leapt when she said it, sending a flicker of heat to my cheeks.

Evan rolled his eyes. “Mom, you met Beth, remember?” His tone was impatient.

“Maybe for a second as you were leaving the house,” she countered. “Anyway, it’s a pleasure to meet you, Emily. Shall we go in?” There was an air about her that made me stand up straighter and afraid to walk, knowing how clumsy I’d appear next to her grace and sophistication. I gave Evan a fearful glance as we approached the first set of stone steps. There were only three, but they might as well have been a flight.

Evan offered me his right elbow to clutch as I concentrated with each step. I don’t think I breathed the entire time. His parents glided ahead of us as I carefully placed one foot in front of the other along the stone pathway. At the top of the second set of steps was an enormous wooden door that opened as Vivian and Stuart neared it. They waited for us before entering.

“Stuart, Vivian,” the dual voices of a man and woman sang. “Welcome. It’s so wonderful to see you again.” Vivian and Stuart were warmly greeted by whom I presumed to be Mr. and Mrs. Jacobs, with a quick embrace that included a brushing kiss on their cheeks and a handshake.

“Evelyn, Maxwell, you remember our youngest son, Evan, don’t you?” Vivian offered as they stepped aside for us to enter.

“Of course,” Mr. Jacobs greeted Evan with a handshake.

“And this is his girlfriend, Emily Thomas,” she introduced. I smiled politely.

“Thank you for joining us,” Mrs. Jacobs said grasping my right hand between her two cool, soft palms.

“Thank you for having me,” I replied.

Evan slipped my coat off and handed it to a formally poised man, dressed in a tuxedo.

I was too distracted by the grand foyer, with its huge crystal chandelier and expansive stone staircase with a large red carpet running down the center, to notice Evan staring at me. I glanced over at him with a start.

“What?!” I was afraid I’d done something wrong already.

“Another pink sweater, huh? You’re killing me.”

I looked at him with wide eyes, my face flooded with color. “Evan!”

He smiled as we followed his parents into a room to the right of the foyer. I wasn’t about to admit that seeing him in the dark tailored suit was just as distracting.

We entered a large room that could easily contain the entire first floor of my house within its walls, with a ceiling that was easily two stories high. The windows along the front of the house were framed with heavy ivory scrolled drapes that were held open with tasseled ropes. The top half of the walls were adorned with soft coral wallpaper, set above ivory wood panels embossed with leafing scrolls. On the large wall across from the entrance, hung two large paintings of a garden and a woman dressed around the period the house was constructed, and another portrait of the mansion was centered on the wall opposite the windows. The remaining wall housed a stone fireplace that was as tall as I was. Hanging above it was a pewter framed mirror that duplicated the size of the massive stone structure.

As predicted, there wasn’t anywhere to sit. There were several oversized antique chairs set against the walls, but they were obviously for appearances only. The only other piece of furniture was a large stone topped table with dark wood legs gathered in the center that rolled out into a round base. Set on the round surface was the biggest floral arrangement I’d ever seen. It looked like a tree of flowers with different colors and textures - it was absolutely amazing.

“Are you okay?” Evan asked, as my unblinking eyes scanned the room.

“Sure,” I replied slowly, nodding my head. He smiled and grabbed my hand to escort me to the corner of the room.

“Evan,” a deep, distinguished voice greeted. It belonged to a man of average height, much shorter than Evan, with dark wavy hair and a thick black mustache. “How are you? Stuart said you were going to be here this evening.”

“It’s great to see you, Mr. Nicols,” Evan acknowledged, shaking his hand. “Mr. Nicols, this is Emma Thomas. We go to school together. Emma, this is Mr. Nicols. He belongs to the same firm as my father.”

“Aren’t you stunning,” he observed, cupping my hand in both of his as his eyes rolled over me. I was taken aback by the greeting, and forced an uncomfortable smile. “Evan, you should bring your girls around here more often.” He nudged Evan with his elbow. It took everything I had to keep an even expression.

After a few more exchanges about soccer and Evan’s winter travel plans, Mr. Nicols excused himself. I let out the breath I’d been holding while in his presence.

“I am so sorry. I had no idea - well, I was afraid - but still didn’t think anyone would actually be that rude.”

“That was interesting,” was all I could say.

“Want something to eat?” he asked, nodding toward a server dressed in a tux, carrying a silver tray of bite-sized food.

“I’m okay.”

“This will be over before you know it,” he promised.

“You keep saying that,” I mumbled, but began to wonder if he was saying it to himself as much as he was to me.

At that time, Vivian approached us with a portly man wearing small frameless glasses. He had a ring of white hair that blended with his pale complexion, contrasted by his ruddy cheeks.

“Evan, you remember Dr. Eckel, correct?” Vivian presented the small round man.

“Of course. It’s nice to see you again, Dr. Eckel,” Evan said, gripping his hand.

“Dr. Eckel, this is Evan’s girlfriend, Emily Thomas.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you Miss Thomas,” Dr. Eckel said, shaking my hand gingerly. I produced a small smile.

“Dr. Eckel is a professor of Bio-Chemistry at Yale,” Evan explained.

“Oh.” I nodded lightly.

“Are you and Evan in many classes together?” his mother asked.

“Evan’s in most of my classes.”

“So you’re intelligent. That’s wonderful,” she concluded, smiling softly. I wasn’t sure what to say to that.

“She’s also a great athlete,” Evan offered, trying to deflect the awkward comment. “The girls’ soccer team won the state championship last night because of her.” His acknowledgement didn’t help. The sweater became unbearably stifling the longer they spoke about me.

“Congratulations,” Dr. Eckel stated. “Have you started looking at colleges?”

“I haven’t visited any campuses yet, but I’ve had a few college scouts come to my games. My first choice is Stanford,” I shared. My voice sounded so small in the huge room.

“Really?” Vivian reacted in interest.

“What do you plan to study?” Dr. Eckel inquired.

“I haven’t narrowed it down yet.”

“She could choose anything,” Evan boasted. “She’s in all of the advanced classes and has a 4.0.”

“Hmm,” his mother responded, still intrigued.

“Well, I wish you the best,” Dr. Eckel offered, shaking my hand once again. “Evan, it’s always a pleasure.” He and Vivian strolled to greet another face they recognized.

I turned to Evan, trying to recover from my elevated temperature. “Don’t do that,” I pleaded.

“I’m sorry, what did I do?”

“Talking about me like that - it’s so uncomfortable.”

“But I didn’t say anything that wasn’t true, and I didn’t exaggerate. Sorry if it’s hard to hear the truth.”

I took another breath. “I’m just not used to this.”

“I know,” he said grabbing my hand and giving it a gentle squeeze. He didn’t let go as I anticipated he would.

“My parents said you were going to be here,” an excited female voice squealed. I watched a stunning girl, with long wavy blond hair, saunter toward us. She wore a strapless black cocktail dress that hugged her slender figure. I felt juvenile and plain in comparison – despite Sara’s best efforts. She wrapped her arms around Evan and gave him a quick peck on the mouth. He released my hand to return the embrace. I became an invisible witness to this intimate greeting, holding my hands in front of me, preferring to look at the floor.

“Catherine, this is Emma Thomas. We go to school together. Catherine is the daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Jacobs,” Evan explained.

She turned to me with a start, oblivious to my presence until Evan mentioned me. I understood why as she pressed her body against his side, with her arms wrapped around his arm.

“Nice to meet you,” she acknowledged with the slightest nod.

“Catherine attends Boston College,” Evan shared, obviously trying to make up for Catherine’s disinterest.

“Do you like it?” I asked, thinking I should say something.

“I do,” she answered shortly, barely glancing at me.

“Evan, I have a surprise for you,” she announced, dismissing me completely. “Come upstairs so I can give it to you.” She started pulling him behind her. My eyes widened, realizing I was being left standing alone.

Evan slowed Catherine’s persistent pace and said something low into her ear. They stopped and she glanced at me with confused eyes. Evan said something else and she looked at him with a furrowed brow as she lightly ran her hand across his cheek. Her face dropped to a sulk. She whispered in his ear and took in his expression with a mischievous grin. He shook his head with an apologetic smile. She shrugged, gave him a quick kiss on the lips, and glided away. I wanted so much to blend into the wallpaper at that moment.

Evan returned to me, his cheeks flushed.

Before he opened his mouth to say anything, I blurted, “Don’t, it’s okay. I really don’t want to know. It’s actually none of my business.”

He examined me cautiously and said, “Really? That didn’t bother you?”