Real Vampires Don't Diet

"Yes, Aggie, darling. You win this round. We're playing your game. So you'll be hearing from us. Soon. Happy now?" I swear I could hear her husky cackle from across the water.

"Come on, V. Let's go up and talk to Brittany. I want to contact the EVs and I'm sure she has a number where we can reach them. As far as I'm concerned, some EVs would be fine for a vamp sacrifice. I'd rather work on that angle than imagine what I could possibly say to Flo. What do you think?"

"I think we need to send that freak-a-zoid and her goddess back where they came from. If a few EVs go with 'em, even better."

Valdez jumped on the elevator. "Hit it, Glory. We're going up, and that Siren's going down." We both winced when thunder shook the deck and lightning crackled mere feet from Ray's boat nearby. Okay, we were definitely taking the stairs.

Chapter Eight

"Glory, mia amica, I tell you I was robbed." Flo, trailed by Richard loaded down with shopping bags, rushed into the shop close to midnight three nights later.

Three long nights when I'd been going crazy playing phone tag with Jerry and leaving messages for the Energy Vampires. Ray and I had talked on the phone to complain about lack of progress when he could get away from Sienna, which wasn't too often.

"Glory? Did you hear me?"

"Of course. What happened? Are you all right? They didn't steal your shoes, did they?" I quickly blocked my thoughts, which had been gloomy to say the least, and threw down the receipts I'd been trying to check. If Flo thought she had problems now, wait till she heard my news. No way was I spilling this without Ray by my side. He was coming by later. We'd do the deed then.

"No. This is a disastro. Worse." Flo grabbed my arm and dragged me toward the back room. "Can your clerk take over? We must talk."

"Sure. Bri?" My stomach clenched. Worse than shoe larceny? I glanced at Brianna who was wide-eyed. The shifter who helped me most nights abandoned the dress rack she'd been inventorying and moved closer, eager to hear the latest gossip. Flo was always good for a story.

"Sure, Glory. Not much going on right now. There's a customer in the dressing room." She gestured at Valdez, who looked ready to take on whoever had "robbed" my ex-roomie. "Maybe you should leave your dog out here, for protection. If there's a problem" Of course Bri hoped I would fill her in later, I usually did.

"You're safe. Flo's" Richard started to smile, but quickly got serious when Flo gave him a look that could have stripped paint off a wall. "Upset about something. Figure of speech. No actual robbery" Another look from Flo and he shut his mouth with a snap.

"My life is terribile. Ricardo, I love you, but you are a man, no?"

"Of course, my darling. You need Glory to understand your pain." Richard followed us to the storeroom and set the bags down with a thump. "Here are the magazines you wanted."

I glanced at the one that slipped off the top of one of the overstuffed bags. Bride Monthly? "Flo, how were you robbed?"

"Isn't it obvious?" She picked up the magazine and waved it like a flag. "I finally, finally after centuries" She paused when Richard shut the storeroom door. I did have a customer. Of course she was afraid now to venture outside. Robbers, you know.

"As I was saying, after centuries of refusing to commit to one man, I finally decide that this is the man I will love per sempre, forever." She smiled and rushed to press herself to Richard, giving him an openmouthed kiss that curled my toes, and I wasn't even involved directly. Suddenly she pushed him away and wiped her mouth.

"Pah! What am I doing? What does he do? He takes me to una caverna! A cave!"

"It was the catacombs, dearest. Under the Vatican. There was candlelight. You said it was romantic."

"Insano! There were rats. And damp. The man who married us was not handsome."

"Paolo has been a close advisor to His Holiness. And to half a dozen popes before him!" Flo ignored this, her bosom heaving as she pulled another magazine out of the bag. "Look at this. So beautiful. A garden. Bridesmaids. What did I have? Three old men in long dresses." She threw Heavenly Brides across the room.

"Cardinals, my precious. You should feel honored. I had to erase their memories afterward."

"As if witnessing our marriage is something shameful? Not to be remembered?" Another fat magazine sailed across the room, this one at Richard's head. His vamp reflexes came in handy and he caught it before it clipped his ear.

"Richard, why don't you find a twenty-four-hour car wash or something. Flo and I need to have some girl talk."

"Good idea, Glory. That drive into the hills left the car filthy." Richard grabbed Flo around her tiny waist. "Remember the last few days, my love?" He leaned down and whispered something in rapid Italian into her ear and she turned scarlet. Wow. Must have been some trip.

Finally she pushed at him, but she was smiling. "Go, wash your car."

"You want a fancy wedding, go for it. I'd marry you a thousand times in a thousand places. Just tell me when and where." He kissed her, then jerked open the door and headed out.

Flo and I looked at each other and blinked back silly tears.

"That was romantic." I rescued the magazine Richard had dropped by the door and shut it again.

"Yes, but he has escaped and left everything up to me, no?" Flo smiled. "I love him. So I marry him again." She pulled out another magazine, this one with colored stick-on flags marking pages. "I want at least six bridesmaids. You will be maid of honor, of course." She flipped open a page. "How you like this dress for you. I complain, but I did like the red the old men were wearing. You look good in red. What do you think?"

I gazed at the size-zero model and tried to imagine my curves in the strapless number with the tulip skirt. Flo was tearing pages out of the magazine and muttering about three-tiered cakes and centerpieces. I didn't dare mention that as far as I knew Flo didn't have six girlfriends to act as bridesmaids. Oh, boy, and I thought a Siren was trouble.

"I think I would love to be your maid of honor. Maybe we can go shopping. I should try on some dresses."

"Yes. And we'll need the right shoes to go with it. I am thinking a March wedding. Ricardo checked the weather on the Internet. Austin in March is perfetto for the outdoor wedding." She looked dreamy for a moment, then grabbed another magazine.

"Look at this. My dress! I fly to New York soon to see if I can get it in a hurry. I don't want to wait for a special order." She held up a picture that was a designer original. Obviously there were no budget limitations here. I knew Flo flying meant shifting. I guess the dress would come to Austin in a more conventional manner.

"It's beautiful, Flo." I tried to imagine myself planning a wedding. To Jerry. He'd go along with whatever I wanted, just like Richard was doing. But I'd always refused to consider that kind of commitment. Now Well now I probably wasn't going to have a future.

"My brother will expect to give me away of course. I don't know. Is he prettier than me?" Flo wheeled on me when I gasped.

"You're blocking your thoughts. He is! Diablo! I will walk myself down the aisle. Damian can stand by the guest book for all I care."

"No! Of course you are much more beautiful." I jumped off the table and hugged Flo. Now was definitely not the time to get into the Casanova thing. I hadn't even told Ray yet. In a complete fit of nerves, I'd just hit the road that night, after Valdez and I'd had our face-to-face with Aggie.

I'd been desperate for a change of clothes and the normalcy of getting back to my own place and my shop. Flo held me off and examined me with her dark eyes. "Your hair's a mess, like you need a good conditioner, and you look like you want to cry. What's up with you, girlfriend? What did you and Jeremiah do New Year's Eve? Did you have a fight?"

"I don't know what Jerry did, other than fly across the Atlantic. I spent the night with Ray." I fingered my fried hair that I'd tried to hide with a vintage scarf. It was getting a hot-oil treatment as soon as I had time. Unfortunately, a vamp's healing sleep doesn't extend to hair and nails. So vampires had to deal with those issues like mortals do, with one great exceptionwe never go gray. Cool, huh? At least Aggie had left me alone for the last few days, but she'd been right about those split ends.

"Mio Dio! I want details." Flo grabbed my arm.

I gave Flo a quick, down-and-dirty version of New Year's Eve and beyond. I left out the Aggie encounter for now. I'd get to that when I could sit down with Flo and Richard and Ray.

"You fed Israel Caine? Don't tell me it didn't get a little hot. Come on now. I know how you are." Flo sighed. "I know how I'd be. Poor Ray, unable to sing. My heart breaks. And then you are the only one who can save him. It's better than one of our favorite soap operas."

We DVR two of them shamelessly. Hey, it's like reading a great book that never ends. And some of the guys on there are hunka-licious.

"Well, yes, it was awesome. Ray needed me. I had to drink from mortals beforehand. So my blood would be full strength."

"Of course. Go on." Flo sat in the chair and crossed her legs. She wasn't a bit shocked. She drank from mortals all the time and had little patience with my usual reliance on synthetics. I must say her natural diet agreed with her. She looked great as always. My former roomie is a size six and a shoe addict, and had just discovered the joys of designer jeans, which hugged her tiny butt perfectly. I'd hate her if she weren't my best friend.

"I drank from Nathan, who happens to be AB negative."

"Your favorite! And he's Ray's best friend. This just keeps getting better."

"We kind of well, Nate and I made Ray think we'd done more than just the blood thing."

"Ooo. So was Ray jealous?"

"Not for long. We're just friends, Flo. Really." ns class="adsbygoogle" style="display:block" data-ad-client="ca-pub-7451196230453695" data-ad-slot="9930101810" data-ad-format="auto" data-full-width-responsive="true">