Providence (Providence #1)
Page 16I sighed in resignation, sinking back into the couch cushion.
He smiled at my pouting. “Not that I’m not incredibly tempted.” He sat up on his knees again, and brushed his lips against mine, pul ing away as quickly as he began.
“Okay. Let’s talk,” I said, more eager than ever to have everything out in the open. “You haven’t been honest with me.”
He raised an eyebrow. “Excuse me?”
“You can’t tel me that you haven’t had time for girls, now. Not when you kiss like that.”
Jared’s expression was ecstatic, and then he made a poor attempt to disguise it. “I beg to differ. I’m not an idiot…it’s not a difficult concept.”
“I have kissed boys, some of those boys more than once, that never kissed like that.”
Jared closed in and kissed my neck—from col ar bone to the line of my jaw—stopping to whisper in my ear. “That’s because you kissed boys, sweetheart.”
My heart pounded so loudly that I was sure he could hear it. I let out a long sigh. “Okay, you’ve got to tel me the rest. The suspense is kil ing me.”
Jared shifted to the couch, turning to face me. His face returned to the worried frown he had before.
“Jared, thus far it’s my understanding that you’ve been raised by a family of assassins. You’ve spied on me, stalked me, instal ed microphones in my bedroom, and confessed to fal ing in love with me before I could drive. If I haven’t left by now, I don’t think I’m going to.”
His face screwed into disgust. “We’re not assassins.”
“Have you ever kil ed anyone?" Jared raised his eyebrows, shocked at my pointed question.
“I…er…yeah. But it was to keep you safe,” he explained.
“You kil ed people for me?” I asked, my mood immediately shifting.
“Don’t feel a second of guilt for those people, Nina. They wouldn’t have lost a single night’s sleep over taking your life.”
I swal owed. “Do you regret it?”
He didn’t hesitate. “Never. It’s who I am.”
“What does that mean? You’re a kil er?”
Jared rubbed the back of his neck nervously. “I don’t think of it that way. We’re protectors. Though there are those that disagree.”
“Like who?” I shook my head, thoroughly confused.
“You’re getting ahead of me.”
“You’re getting ahead of yourself.”
“I know.” He rubbed his temples with his thumb and forefinger and sighed.
“You’re making me nervous.” I laughed without humor. He looked up at me; the hardness of his eyes didn’t relieve my trepidation. “Is it that bad?”
“It’s just…implausible. It wil be your first inclination to be skeptical, and I don’t blame you. But it’s the truth.”
I nodded and then took his hand in mine. “I’m ready.”
“When Jack was twenty-one, he worked for a man named Van Buren. While working there, he befriended Van Buren’s oldest son, Luke, and because Jack spent so much time with Luke, my father in turn spent quite a bit of time in Luke’s home.
“It didn’t take long for Luke’s younger sister, Lil ian, to catch Gabe’s attention. Lil ian is my mother. Similar to the way I feel about you, he couldn’t stay away from her. Eventual y he made the choice to reveal himself to her, which is against the rules.”
I started to ask about the rules, but Jared held a finger up so that I would let him continue, “Gabe made a huge sacrifice to be with Lil ian. He loved her, and so as far as he was concerned, he had no choice. Even though he had given up everything, his existence stil depended on Jack.”
I shook my head. “Why did it depend on my father?”
“Gabe was assigned to him. For my father, and those like him, he is assigned to someone—his Taleh—from their birth. Because I’m half of what my father was, the draw isn’t right away. We have to figure it out on our own, and that’s part of why my siblings and I are the bastards of Gabe’s world.”
“Gabe’s world? I’m sorry, Jared, I don’t understand,” I shook my head in frustration.
Jared’s hardened expression smoothed into a warm smile. “I know. You wil . I’m trying to explain this in the best way possible. Trust me.”
“Sweet potato fries?” I smiled, trying to lighten the mood.
Jared’s grin widened. “Sweet potato fries.”
He watched me for a moment, and several emotions scrol ed across his face. His hands touched my cheeks and then he pressed his lips against mine. It felt like he was saying goodbye.
He reluctantly let me go, and avoided my eyes when he spoke. “We aren’t accepted by Gabe’s family or his enemies. It makes it very difficult to do our job in some ways, and easier in others.”
“You mean as protectors,” I determined. Jared confirmed my revelation with an approving nod, but my expression caused his smal smile to vanish.
“What?” he spoke in a soft, hesitant tone.
“Are you saying there is a society of protectors out there that al do…what you do?”
“S-Sort of. But it’s…providential.” He waited anxiously for my mind to catch up to what he was saying.
“Providential?” I repeated, letting the word simmer...providential protectors. He chose his words careful y, specifical y attaching divinity to describe the family he referred to. When the comprehension hit, Jared winced. “Are you talking angels, Jared?” I said, indignant.
“I told you it would be your first inclination.”
I waited for him to tel me he was joking, but his eyes were far from amused. I stood up and paced between the table and the couch.
He was serious.
He expects me to believe he is a…he’s my….guardian angel! I thought. My mind mul ed over wings, halos, and harps, and I laughed out loud. Jared watched me pace as if he were afraid he’d sent me over the edge.
“I’m not an angel,” he said as if I was total y off-base. “My father is. Was,” he corrected.
“You’re half….” I trailed off, unable to mouth the word. I felt ridiculous for even considering it.
“Human,” he amended, intercepting the alternative.
My thoughts traced to Jared’s lobbing the man the impossible distance across the parking lot. “That does explain some things. But….” I shook my head. I wanted to believe him and that made remaining objective more difficult.
Jared walked toward me, but I instinctively took a step back.
He cringed at my reaction. “I would never lie to you. Do you believe that?”
I touched his fading scar with my fingers. “It makes sense, real y.”
I had described him as angelic once, when I hadn’t realized it was closer to the truth than I could have ever imagined. His glowing blue-grey eyes, his strength, the flawlessness of his face and the way he moved; it would be the only explanation. It suddenly didn’t matter if it were possible. I believed him.
“I stil have questions,” I said.
Hope touched Jared’s eyes, and he led me to the table. I took a bite of my half-eaten slice of cake and giggled.
“Something’s funny?” he raised an eyebrow.
“Angel Food.” I pressed my lips together, stifling a laugh.
Jared chuckled and sucked in a big breath, seeming relieved.
“Angel Food. Good one.” He attempted an annoyed expression, but the relief on his face thwarted his efforts.
“Sorry.”
“You’re forgiven,” he said immediately. “So. Now you know.”
“Everything?”
“Pretty much.” A fresh energy seemed to surround him. “There is more, but it’s the logistics of what I’ve told you, and part of that…wel , it’s best that you don’t know about them.”
“Them?”
“You know the stories, Nina. Where there’s light, there’s dark. If I go into detail and you become aware, it attracts them. Do you understand what I’m saying?”
My body suddenly felt cold, causing my shoulders to curve in and shudder. I knew exactly what he was talking about: demons. Of course they would exist if angels did.
Jared’s eyes sympathized with my reaction, and he pul ed my chair closer to him, leaning over to kiss my forehead. “I suppose I didn’t think through the consequences of promising absolute truth. I don’t want you to be afraid, Nina. I would never let anything happen to you.”
I took a deep breath and put on a brave face for him. “I know,” I shook my head, “there is so much that I don’t understand.”
“You have more questions?” he asked, ready for the next barrage of inquiries.
I looked at my watch. It was almost midnight. “I’m not sure I can get them al in tonight.”
“You have somewhere to be?”
“No. I assumed you wanted to sleep sometime. You do sleep, don’t you?”
Jared smiled. “I do. But I don’t require as much…just a few hours to recharge. Claire and I take shifts.” He sighed and touched my arm. “I owe you another apology. I hadn’t slept long—about twenty minutes when Claire cal ed to inform me that you wandered out of town and were stranded on a dark road. She was prepared to let you wait, but I couldn’t just let you sit in the cold. I’m sorry I was so…abrupt.”
“Cranky when tired…check,” I nodded once.
Relief brightened Jared’s face. “This is surreal. I’ve dreamed about how I would tel you for years, and now it’s done.”
“And here I sit, in front of my half-angel Hybrid boyfriend eating cake. I think I win.”
Three lines appeared on Jared’s forehead when his eyebrows shot up. “Oh. It’s boyfriend, now, is it?”
“Are you okay?” Jared asked, concerned.
“I’m fine. I just…I didn’t mean…ugh!” I moaned, covering my eyes with one hand.
“Nina,” he chided, “as if I’m not thril ed beyond words at that idea.” Jared pul ed my hand from my face. “What could you possibly have to be embarrassed about?”
“Just…forget I said anything, okay?” I said sheepishly.
“Absolutely not,” he smiled.
I involuntarily yawned, using the back of my fingers to cover my open mouth.
“I should take you home,” he said.
“I don’t want to go home. I stil have questions,” I argued, wiping the inevitable tears that fol owed.
“We have a long, long time for Q and A, sweetheart,” he said, tucking my hair behind my ear. I smiled, realizing why he always seemed to pul my hair from my face the moment it crossed my mind.
I yawned again, but stubbornly shook my head. “The cut on your face?”
Jared touched it with two of his fingers. “There are pro’s and con’s to being what my father’s world cal s Half-breeds.”
I wrinkled my nose at the word. “Sounds derogatory to me.”
“It is. Most Archs don’t believe we should exist, and the…Others see us as the enemy as wel .”
“Archs?”
“There are several types of angels: Seraphim, Cherubim, Thrones…there are nine in al . Archangels serve as protectors for humans. They relay messages, fight demons on occasion, and protect their Taleh against harm, from demon and human alike. But al humans have Archs, and even if their Taleh is threatened by another Arch’s Taleh, Arch’s are forbidden to harm humans. They are strictly protectors, but that protection has limits because of the Laws. Claire, Bex and I are half-human, freeing us from many of those restrictions, just like my father when he chose to live as human.”
“So…Gabe…turned human?”
“No. He relinquished the ability to transfer planes….” My expression must have reflected how foreign the words sounded to me, because he stopped to explain. “To be invisible. Fal ing from grace has a price. Archs are cursed when they choose to stay, and that curse carries on to their offspring; although, it lessens with each generation. As the blood is diluted with the human gene pool, so is the curse.”
“What kind of curse?” I asked. His world was much darker than wings and harps.
“Archs are obligated to protect their humans even after they fal , and because their priorities have been compromised, so to speak, the curse keeps that obligation in check. Fal en and their offspring, like Archs, don’t get sick and we can’t be kil ed. But unlike Archs, we experience a degree of pain and have a limited life span. Once our Taleh die, we almost immediately fal il and expire.”
“So you lost your father when I lost mine,” I whispered.
Jared nodded infinitesimal y and wiped a tear from my eye.
I leaned away from his hand. “Please don’t do that. Don’t comfort me for your father’s death.”
Jared shook his head. “I can’t stand to see you cry. Not when I’m close enough to stop it.”
“I’m so sorry, Jared.” I couldn’t imagine having to experience the constant worry of not only my father’s mortality, but someone else’s as wel , for the sake of my father.