Perfectly Imperfect

Until I learned what it was like to truly believe in myself.

But I also know I would have done the same thing in her shoes and reached out to hold on to anything that helped me function.

I recently learned I was the person who could have helped myself all along.

I sit down and reach out to pull her into my arms and we both sit there silently offering the other person something different. I’m sure for her this is her way of building the bridge of forgiveness that I needed to walk across in order to get to the future Kane was promising. I’m thankful for her ability to tell me her story even though I know that wasn’t easy. For her to fearlessly trust I won’t use it against her.

But for me, this embrace is a lot more than just forgiving her, Kane, and the impossible situation that almost ruined us. This is about me trying to show her that no matter how lonely she feels at her bottom, she will never be alone. There is always someone there to help you climb back up to your feet. It’s a lesson that sometimes people never learn. I was lucky enough to have my own savior help me find the strength I needed to see my own worth, so I can only hope I’m able to give a little of that to Mia.

THE HEAVINESS AROUND US CONTINUED when I let my arms fall from Mia. She looked so lost and frightened that I wanted nothing more than to make everything better for her.

I glance around the room, examining Kole’s pained face for a beat before I look over at the man who has held the weight of the world on his shoulders while keeping this secret. And he held the burden of Mia’s pain knowing he could have very well lost his own happiness in the process. It amazes me just how selfless this man is. He was willing—is willing—to put up with the lies and rumors in order to protect his family. And that’s just what this is, his family. Mia might not be a Masters by blood, but I see now that she has always been like a sister to him. Even if this baby wasn’t Kyle’s, I feel confident that Kane would have done the exact thing.

My strong and altruistic man. I had feared the worst, but the reality was so much more heartbreaking than I could have imagined. Not for me, but for Mia. I don’t blame Kane for feeling the need to hold on to his promise, regardless of the fact that his word means so much to him because this was so much bigger than just a pregnant friend.

This secret can ruin so many lives.

And the weight of it has broken the woman held captive in the center of the storm. She may have been a confident woman at one point, but the one breaking down in front of me is at the bottom of her barrel. A place I know all too well is the worst kind of living hell to be trapped in.

“I promise, I’ll find a way to fix this,” Mia sobs, interrupting my thoughts. “I won’t let this tear you guys apart.”

Her words spark an idea that had been pushing its way to the forefront of my mind since this horrible story began to unfold. One that now, as I close my eyes and try to keep it together for Mia’s sake, I feel the steady resolve of my decision take root.

This is an unfathomable situation facing us all. The repercussions of our choices from this moment on will shape the path of all of our lives, but the most important one of all being the innocent child who deserves more than having its existence turning into a public mockery of shame that will always haunt him his whole life. Mia didn’t ask for this, and while I have no doubt that she loves her unborn son, she has no idea how to shield him from the monsters of the world. Monsters that I know firsthand will do nothing but make sure you never feel an ounce of happiness. Until recently, I had been terrified of them, but now I feel a power I never knew possible when I think about being able to keep that pain from touching someone else.

“No, Mia.” I reach out and hold her hand in mine. The second her cold and clammy skin touches mine, my decision to fight for someone else becomes an all-consuming kind of determination. “You have nothing to fix.”

Her sobs grow, and I take my hand from hers to pull her to me, her head falling to my chest as she cries. Huge, body-jolting sobs, which have pinpricks of emotion pushing up my throat, burning my nose, and stinging my eyes. I take a deep swallow, pushing through that emotion, and attempt to calm myself in order to take on the hardship that is slowly killing this woman.

Kole and Kane share a heated stare, both looking powerless and unsure of how to proceed. This is so much more than not knowing how to soothe a woman. These men aren’t just watching someone they care about vulnerably break. If I had to guess, they’re in just as much pain right now. Kole, having just found out about the truth behind Mia’s pregnancy and his older brother’s role in it, might not have the magnitude of emotions that I’m sure Kane has. Yet. But I have no doubt they will hit. I know that Kane is hurting for Mia, having just relived this through her words, but he’s been searching my eyes since he arrived. His expression is one of confused anxiety and pleading desperation as he tries to gauge my thoughts in order to figure out what this new truth means for us.

I look away from the Masters men and bend my head so that Mia can hear me over her cries. “I can’t imagine what you’ve been going through, Mia. I know that it wasn’t easy to tell me, but thank you for trusting me with this. You have my promise that your secret is safe with me.”

I see Kane’s head bows and his shoulders slump. I wish I could go to him, but he needs to understand that I’m able to handle this without him. Regardless of how badly I want his arms and protection to shield me, I know now that I’m stronger than I had ever imagined. I need him to see that in order to believe what I’m about to say. To have no doubt that I’m now the one who’s ready to take someone else’s metaphorical hand and help guide her to a beautiful future.

Just as he did for me.

“We’re not telling anyone,” I tell the room with conviction.

Mia gasps and both Kane and Kole look over at me with disbelief.

“Willow, you don’t know what you’re saying,” Kole responds, breaking from his own shock first.

“He’s right, baby. This isn’t going to go away. Just because I publicly and undoubtedly confirmed our relationship, the fact that they still believe Mia’s baby is mine is only going to get worse unless we figure out a way to address it without hurting Mia or the baby.”

I shake my head and give him a small smile meant to soothe his worries.

“No. We won’t let this go past this room until Mia wants it to. This is so much bigger than having some rumors and stories printed about us, Kane. So much bigger.”