Loving Lawson
Page 8I loved a woman who knew what she wanted. None of that insecure bullshit to weigh me down. Tru was all about fun in the moment, a nice little getaway for me twice a week. She was safe. Nothing like the STD walking hookers that begged me for a fuck on the side of the road.
I was extremely picky with who I put my dick into.
When she began licking my lips, I felt that deep stir within me grow. After a certain point, there was no stopping it.
Lust was a bitch.
She pushed me back and led me to my room.
Five
Allie
Well, until now I’d completely forgotten the walls in this place were damn thin.
So Heath rejected that girl at the warehouse because he had another thing on the side. I wondered if she was as sexy and bold as she sounded.
Come fuck the brains out of me, Heath.
But jeez, talk about exciting a man. I reflected on Ryker and his constant pressure to be more open sexually. We’d been having sex since I was sixteen. After the first year, he wanted me to be more outgoing. Lingerie and sexy talk were the main kind of things he asked more of, but it freaked me out and made me feel stressed with the pressure to fulfil his wants the way he liked. Didn’t help he was two years older than me and much more experienced, and I constantly felt like I was competing against the women of his past. Because like Heath, Ryker had a long past, which was impressive for his age.
I heard the bedroom next door shut, proceeded by sounds of kissing. I was sprawled out on Ryker’s double bed, trying very hard not to listen to everything. Shame these places weren’t soundproof. The apartment building itself was pretty derelict and dodgy, but the boys had done the interior well, decorating it with good, simple furniture.
Two people were being intimate with each other so close to where I lay, and I was surprised by how lonely I felt in that moment. It wasn’t just intimacy I craved. Ryker hadn’t just been my boyfriend, he’d been more like my best friend.
“I didn’t do it,” he’d told me after he’d gotten arrested. His light brown eyes stared deeply into my own as he held me to him. “Baby, you have to believe me. I fucked up bad by being around the guys, but I didn’t think it’d cost me you. Please don’t leave me. I didn’t actually do it.”
I wanted to believe him, because I knew if I did then I wouldn’t have to break up with him. After my father died three years ago, he was the only neighbourhood boy that stopped by and made sure I was alright. We were childhood friends, completely comfortable around each other, but the death of my father was pinnacle. It brought us closer and made him really look at me.
He was out of my league. The Lawson boys were beyond beautiful. So when he asked me out on a date, I nearly fell over with shock. Me? I wasn’t your average looking girl. I was pretty plain. I never cared about hair and make-up. Never tried to impress others by what I wore. I suppose after a childhood of being bullied about my long, thin limbs and ghost-like skin, I’d tried my best to be invisible.
“Just stop lying to me,” I’d told him sharply. “They found the drugs on you, Ryker. You’ve been caught red-handed. So just fess up!”
When he’d continued to deny it, my anger exploded at him. I told him that until he told me the truth, I was done. I still meant it. I knew if I went around to see him in prison, he’d probably continue to lie. And if there was one thing I hated the most, it was liars. So I was on my own, essentially. And if he fessed up? Well… I didn’t know. He was now a criminal, like half the guys in Hedley, and that wasn’t an endearing trait to want in your boyfriend. Mostly, I was just angry. Even if I found it in me to forgive his lies and his crime, I was certain my image of him would be forever tarnished.
And that just made me sad.
I grabbed the half-empty bottle of cologne from his dresser and removed the lid. I dotted some on my wrist, feeling comforted by the smell of him all around me. It reminded me of all the times he’d stopped what he was doing to be with me.
I missed him, but I also reminded myself of all the nights he was out, leaving me behind in this very bed. Now I knew for certain he’d been up to no good, and that helped me overcome the missing him part immensely. Replacing it was a bitterness that dug deep in my bones, and I suppose this was the beginning of my road to resenting him.
Despite the moans next door, my exhaustion caught up to me, and I fell asleep a short while later.
*
The problem with pregnancy, I quickly came to realize, was you had to pee. A lot.
I tossed and turned before the feeling of a full bladder was too hard to ignore. I sat up and rubbed my eyes when the sounds of more moaning rushed into my ears. I sighed and checked the time.
1:27am
I’d been asleep for three hours and they were still at it?
Or maybe this was round two.
But my bladder…
I slowly slipped out of bed and tip toed to the door. I opened it inch by inch until I could slip through. One step, two steps…
I halted when I saw his bedroom door was half a foot open. I couldn’t see anything from this angle – not that I wanted to – so I continued to tip toe, holding my breath as I passed the doorway and continued down the hall. I was a lot more comfortable on my way there. The girl was proving to be helpful in my endeavour to be unheard. She was loud. Very, very loud.
“Yes, yes, Heath, oh my God.” Moans. “That’s it. How are you doing that?” Doing what? “Oh, my GOD!” Heavy breaths. “YES! YES! YES!”
I swallowed a bubble of laughter as I pushed open the bathroom door and entered. I shut it behind me and covered my mouth in case it escaped. Of all the women he brought home, I’d never heard one so loud before.
“THAT’S IT! THAT’S IT!”
I quietly did my thing on the toilet, and then I waited for a particular moan/scream to flush it. I washed my hands, splashing some on my overheated cheeks. Another pregnancy thing that sucked: hot flashes.