Kiss the Dead (Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter #21)

WE DIDN'T FIND any bombs, and thanks to the wererats and some of the ex-military in both the werehyenas and wereleopards, we had people who knew what they were doing. If there had been anything to find, I trusted our people to find it. I got the official go-ahead from Dolph about three hours after Brice had called and warned us. Three hours is a long time to wait to warn people.

Dolph ended the conversation with, "I'm sorry, Anita."

"What about?" I asked.

"That some people are more interested in the case than in keeping people safe. Some of these guys are as conflicted about the preternatural community as I was a couple of years back." That was a lot for him to admit.

"Thanks, Dolph, that means a lot coming from you."

"I don't understand the whole fascination with the preternaturals, but I know my son is still happy, and I've never seen you happier than you are right now. The wife says you're not supposed to understand love; if it made complete sense, it wouldn't be love."

"That sounds illogical and absolutely true," I said.

"Illogical and true; sounds about right for love," Dolph said, and he'd hung up.

By the time I knew that everyone was safe and no bombs were anywhere we had looked, dawn had come and gone by hours. I felt Jean-Claude die for the day, and knew that meant Asher had gone before him, because he wasn't powerful enough to stay awake as long as Jean-Claude. They did better in the underground, but the sun came up and the vampires went down, that was just the way it worked. I felt Jean-Claude curl up around the other man, and knew I would find them in the bed together. I didn't like sleeping with vampires once they went cold for the day, so I'd be bunking with Micah and Nathaniel in our room, and maybe Sin, if he was there and not in a hospital bed.

Claudia and I were walking down the midway of the Circus. This close to dawn it was closed tight. One of the things that had made it so hard to search was this section with its booths shuttered tight. There were the usual fairway games, but the stuffed toy prizes hanging from the eaves of the little shopfronts ran high to bats, black cats, Frankenstein's monsters, and strangely cuddly mummies with the glimpses of dead skin through the fuzzy wrappings played for comedy instead of scares. There was scarier stuff from some shops: fake shrunken heads on a stick, monster eyeballs in plastic jars, and a booth that put fake scars and wounds on you. I could smell the sweetness of the cotton candy, the cinnamon of the elephant ears and bear claws booth, renamed "monster ears" and "werewolf claws," and the funnel cakes that always smelled like your grandmother's kitchen was supposed to smell, but never had.

I liked walking the Circus after it was closed. I think it appealed to the little girl in me who had always wondered what happened when the fair closed down. I knew now that it was just like any other job for most of the people. They cleaned up, did prep for the next day, and closed down, but when you're little, the traveling carnival is magical, a mysterious world that you only get to visit. There'd been a time when the midway here seemed ominous; now it seemed homey. If I walked through here, it was usually after closing and I was going to bed: home.

Claudia's phone sounded, and she walked a little away from me to take it. I gave her the privacy. The wererats were primarily our guards in town, but they had business out of town, and it was strictly a don't-ask, don't-tell policy. I carried a badge; I did not need to know details about their mercenary jobs.

She came back to me with a look on her face that I couldn't read, but it wasn't a good look.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"Mephistopheles is sitting against the wall in the living room, crying," she said.

"Crap," I said.

"You don't even need to ask why, do you?" she said.

"No."

"So it's true you are sending Asher away for what he did last night?"

I nodded.

"About damn time," she said.

"You really don't like him, do you?"

"He's your lover, not mine, Anita. I wouldn't put up with his emotional blackmail shit."

"We're sort of through with it, too," I said. I started walking toward the far door and the entrance to the underground. She fell into step beside me.

"It was Graham on the phone." He was one of the few werewolf guards we had, and since he knew nothing about explosives, he'd been kept downstairs to guard the sleeping. He was better at being a bouncer at the clubs than a gun-toting bodyguard.

I shrugged. "So?"

"He called me, to find you, to send to Mephistopheles. If Jean-Claude had been awake for the night, he'd have still sent me to find you."

I could see the door to the underground now. Tonight it had two of the black-dressed guards on it. Usually there were guards only on the inside in the little room behind the doors, but tonight and for the next little bit we were going to put guards on the door. We were going to beef up our security everywhere, hoping to discourage the crazy.

"Dev is my tiger to call."

"It's not that, Anita. Micah is traveling more for the Coalition. Nathaniel takes care of everyone like a 1950s housewife, but he isn't dominant enough to handle comforting Mephistopheles."

"So I'm the go-to person for the hand holding, I get that."

She shook her head hard enough to make her high, tight braid bounce. "We would never call Jean-Claude about this, that's my point."

I stopped walking and looked at her. "Okay, just stop being subtle; you're not good at it, and I'm not good at figuring it out."

She smiled. "You stand there dressed like one of us, and you don't get it."

I glanced down at my clothes and had to smile back. I was in black T-shirt, black jeans, black belt with a blackened belt buckle, and black boots. They had a heel on them, so they were a little more club than guard, but other than that Claudia was right. My holsters and weapons decorated me like every other guard's. Unless it was business hours, we didn't try to hide that we were armed.

"I guess I do have a lot of assassin chic in my closet."

"I know Nathaniel didn't pick the shirt because it doesn't show cleavage, and I'd send a guard back to get lower heels on the boots, but other than that you look like one of us."

"Thanks, I think."

She grinned, and it transformed her face into something beautiful, happy. She didn't smile like that enough. "We trust you to understand whatever we bring to you, Anita. We trust you with the decisions about the guns and violence, and this kind of stuff, too."

"You mean that Dev is crying?"

She nodded, and the grin faded around the edges. "I couldn't date this many people. It's hard enough dealing with just one person at a time. I can't imagine taking care of this many people."

"Are you dating someone right now?" I asked.

She blushed. I'd never seen Claudia blush.

It was my turn to grin. "Who is it?"

She shook her head. "You go take care of your lover, leave mine to me."

"Oooh, lover is it, not boyfriend."

She laughed, and it was the kind of laugh I'd never heard from her. "Go talk to the Devil." She walked away, still laughing. I watched her go, and wondered how I'd missed it. It had to be serious for her to mention it at all. Claudia in love; who'd have thunk it? Cool.

I went for the door to the underground, and to take care of my Devil. The thought made my shoulders want to slump a little, as if I were trying to carry something heavy, but I straightened up, took a deep breath, tightened my core, and stood as straight as my five foot three could manage with the help of the three-inch heels. It was a lot of work to take care of all the people I was dating, but there was no one I would trade away. Asher might force us to send him away, but I'd miss him, and I hadn't been his main sweetie for a year like Dev had. He'd wanted to add an extra girl, not lose the man he loved. I sighed, made sure I stayed standing straight, no slumping, and went to take care of my golden tiger to call, my Devil, who was crying over his broken heart. One of the hardest things to learn about being polyamorous was you could be totally heartbroken about relationship B, but still be happy about relationship C, but having C didn't make losing B less painful. It meant you had another established relationship to help you heal over the lost one, but your heart still broke. I'd had this idea that if you loved more people you wouldn't get your heart truly broken unless you lost them all, but like so many theories, reality was different. But as realities went, I wouldn't have traded mine. I hoped I could convince Dev the same.