Kiss the Dead (Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter #21)

THE ROOM WAS very quiet after they left. I don't know what I would have said into that silence, because my phone rang. Did I dive for it a little too eagerly? Maybe, but it was with my pile of weapons beside the bed. That meant that I had to crawl over the acres of black bedspread to grab it. Asher bent down and handed it to me, so that I had to take it from him as I hit the screen and said, "Blake here, talk to me."

"Marshal Blake?" It was the new Marshal, Arlen Brice.

"Yeah, Marshal Blake here, sorry, Brice. What's up?"

"They found bomb-making materials in one of the closets at the house we raided with SWAT."

I was quiet for a second, trying to process it. "Why would they have that? What the hell do vampires need with bombs?"

Asher and Jean-Claude went very still on either side of me. I couldn't explain it, but I knew the stillness was more of a startle reaction than any expression they could have given me. I should not have said the word bomb out loud. It was a damn ongoing police investigation, but it had startled me.

"One of the vampires that died at the warehouse was a retired demolitions expert," Brice said.

"Military?" I asked.

"No, civilian, construction, but that just means he knows how to bring down a whole building."

"Not comforting," I said.

"Zerbrowski said that the vamps at the warehouse were talking trash about you and Jean-Claude, so I figured you'd want to know about the bomb stuff."

"Just stuff, not actual devices?"

"No, but the bomb techs are treating this real serious. They seem convinced that some bombs were actually made, which means they may be out there in the city somewhere."

"These guys wanted to be seen as sympathetic in the media. Blowing shit up doesn't gain sympathy from anyone."

"True, but it doesn't stop people from doing it," Brice said.

I wanted to argue, but couldn't, so I let that part go. "Any hint on size of device? What we might want the security details to be looking at?"

"This isn't my area. I can read the preliminary report, but not sure I'm the one you want interpreting it. Talk to" - and he was quiet, as I listened to him riffling papers and clicking keys - "Alvarez, Mark Alvarez, is the lead guy."

"Let me get a pen, and then give me his number."

Jean-Claude got the small notebook and pen that stayed on the bedside table now. There was one by every bed in every room that was "mine."

"You can call Alvarez, but not until you've been informed officially. I mean, I want to help, but don't get us both fired, and you can't tell your boyfriend and his people about what we found."

"Why, because I'm not supposed to know?" I asked.

"They're worried that Jean-Claude could have some of these nuts inside his organization, so if we tell him then we'll be tipping our hand."

"And if someone gets blown up before we share?"

"They actually wouldn't let Zerbrowski leave the big meeting, because they said he'd tell you, and you'd tell the vampires."

"Jesus, Brice, so why are you telling me?"

"They don't think I owe you anything, so they don't think I'll tell you."

"You could get in trouble for this," I said.

"You ready for Alvarez's number?" Brice asked.

"Yeah, shoot."

He gave me Alvarez's contact info. "Got it," I said.

"I just wanted you to have a heads-up as soon as possible."

"I really appreciate that, Brice."

"Hey, as someone who's still looking for true love outside the normal box, I want to support anyone who's found it. I'm not sure if it's prejudice, or if all they're thinking about is the case, but I'm listening to some upper brass make up shitty reasons to justify their actions. Makes me think I'm not coming out anytime soon."

"The new vampire laws make them treat them better, more like people, but new laws don't change how people feel. Thanks again, Brice."

"Not a problem, just don't call Alvarez for a couple of hours. I looked up some of your bodyguards; they've got backgrounds in demolition, military."

"Do my fellow cops have files on my people?"

"Some, but I've been federal longer than you have. I called in a few favors, told them I just wanted to know what I was up against if things went bad. They totally bought it, Blake. I get the idea that certain people are betting when you and your people go off the reservation, not if."

"Sleep with a few vampires and shapeshifters, and people get all weird about it," I said.

"Yep," he said, "gotta go." He hung up.

I hit the button, if button is the right word for brushing your thumb across a screen. If I hadn't had years of practice with vampires, and these vamps in particular, I might have thought that they weren't interested in what had just happened, were bored even, but I knew that the stillness, and the pleasant faces, meant they were very interested.

I glanced at Asher, since he was in front of me, but it was Jean-Claude to whom I turned and gave major eye contact. "You heard?"

"Yes," he said simply.

"You know I don't normally share information about ongoing investigations."

"You are very careful about it," he said, and that amazing face was still pleasant, still neutral.

"I have to be if I'm going to be a cop."

"I understand that, ma petite." Again, that careful voice.

"I can make both of you promise, word of honor, and all that shit, to tell no one, and I know you'll do it."

"Word of honor, and all that shit," he repeated, but there was a faint edge of his French accent, and that, more than anything else, let me know how upset he was; the accent came out only when he wished it to, or when he was very emotional.

I looked up at Asher, who was still standing by the bed. "You, too, blondie."

"I will do what you and Jean-Claude wish me to do. I have caused enough problems with my childish behavior."

"I wish you meant that," I said.

He looked down, giving me the full weight of those pale blue eyes, through that lace of golden hair. "I mean every word I say."

I sighed. "You do, don't you?"

"Oui," he said.

"You are sorry, but you also meant everything you yelled at us earlier, and you meant to hurt me so that no one else could have certain skills from me for a while."

"Can you not forgive me?" he asked.

I waved it away. "Ask me later; right now I'm about to break a rule, one that could cost me my badge. There are people on the force who want to get rid of me for sleeping with you guys, and this could be excuse enough, but if one of these missing bombs blows up and hurts someone I care about, the job won't mean much to me." I thought about it for a few more seconds, but in the end I weighed love higher than my badge, and that meant that Larry and everyone else who thought sleeping with the monsters divided my loyalties were partially right. They were right, because I called Claudia, and told her to tell our security at all of our businesses to look for the damn things. There was a chance that our guards would keep the secret, and they swept for listening devices almost every damn day. They could just accidentally find the bombs when they were looking for electronic bugs. In fact, they probably would have found them, if they were there to be found, either way. But I didn't know much about explosives. I didn't know if searching for bugs would have made them miss bombs, I just didn't know, and I wasn't willing to take the chance.

Yes, I was dating too many people, and taking care of too many people. Yes, I was a little overwhelmed by it sometimes, but I was also happier than I'd ever been in my life, and I didn't want to lose that. I didn't want to lose anyone that I loved. If that eventually cost me my badge, so be it.

Was I a U.S. Marshal, or Jean-Claude's human servant? Was I a Marshal, or Micah's Nimir-Ra? Was I a police officer, or Nathaniel's sweetie? Was I an officer, or Nicky's master? Was I a cop, or the new Mistress of Tigers of Sin, and Dev, and Jade, and Ethan, and Crispin, and... Could I keep being a cop and be everything else?

I sat there on the edge of the bed and, for the first time, really thought the answer might be no.