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Page 20She’d do great things. She’s wise and levelheaded … sees things from all angles. And they’ll take her back with open arms. No questions. My breath falls shallow. Leaving the pride for good might translate into a greater loss than I ever imagined if it means losing my sister. There was solace in knowing she was coming with me. But I’ll have Will.
“So you’ll do this for the pride?” I ask.
“Is that so hard to believe?”
“Um, actually. Yes.” For years she hated the pride—wanted to be free of it forever. I was the one that wanted to stay.
Then she gives herself away.
Her gaze slides ever so slightly away, off to the side.
I follow her eyes to the enormous gray draki, flanking our group. When I look back at her she’s facing forward again, trying to pretend I didn’t catch her unconscious glance. But it’s too late. I saw. I already suspected there was something between the two of them. The beginning of something anyway.
“We all change,” she says vaguely.
“Yes. We do.” I guess Tamra looking at someone else besides Cassian attests to that. She’s right. Everything changes … evolves. And I feel a sense of anticipation bubble through me, eager for the future to come with Will. Whatever happens, I know we’ll be together.
I drop back a few paces, falling into step beside Will. He glances down at me and I smile up at him, just so glad, so relieved to have him here with me.
With my smile I try to convey to him that this isn’t forever, that we’ll leave soon. I’m not Tamra. The pride might need her, but not me. I’m not going to let Will down—or myself.
He gazes down at me rather intently, curiously.
“This is the place,” Cassian announces as we step into a small break in the forest. He removes his backpack and squares off before a wall of tangled brush. I watch as he begins removing it piece by thorny piece, tossing the branches to the ground and revealing a deep cave.
I step forward and peer inside, surprised to find a stash of supplies already there. I look at Cassian questioningly.
He shrugs. “You never know. Better safe than sorry.”
“What is this place? Does the pride know about this? Your father?”
“No. Just me.”
I glance again at the bags of food and various gear and equipment, seeing it for what it is—a stockpile. I can’t believe Cassian ever thought to take such measures. If the pride was ever in trouble or danger, I just assumed Cassian would go down with it rather than escape. That’s what he led me to believe.
Looking over the supplies, I see there are even gemstones. It’s not just an emergency stockpile. It’s everything a draki would want if he was running away and starting over someplace else. Someplace new.
“You thought about leaving the pride?” I struggle with this—trying to reconcile the Cassian I thought I knew with the Cassian before me.
He’s always been about the pride—doing what’s best for the community. But this … my gaze sweeps the well-stocked cache of supplies. It makes me wonder if maybe Cassian didn’t have other plans once. Plans that didn’t include becoming the pride’s future alpha.
Cassian shrugs yet again and this tips me over from confusion to irritation. He’s the one who’s been my conscience, the voice in my head that’s made me feel so guilty for letting the pride down these past few months. He’s the one who’s reminded me over and over that the pride is more important than any single one of us. And here he is … with an exit plan in place. I let him feel my annoyance at his hypocrisy—for once enjoying that he can sense my emotions.
He blinks and looks away, a flush burning beneath his swarthy skin.
We move into the shelter of the cave. Deghan has to duck his head so it doesn’t collide with the low ceiling. Folding his great leathery wings close to his body, he sticks tight to Tamra, joining her as she starts looking through Cassian’s stash.
“You should all be fine here until I return.”
Miram inches closer to her brother. “I don’t want you to go. Don’t leave me.”
Cassian gives her arm a squeeze. “You’ll be all right. Don’t leave the group. They can protect you if you’re tracked.”
She whimpers a little and shakes. “I’m scared, Cassian.”
He hugs her then and my earlier annoyance fades. I understand her fear, her need to cling to Cassian. When I was friendless in the pride, a virtual pariah, I’d clung to him, too. I move close and touch Miram’s arm, trying to lend additional comfort.
“I can’t take you into the pride. You know that. I promise I won’t be gone long. We’ll figure this out and you’ll be back in your bed before you know it.” He looks at me then as he adds, “You can trust Jacinda.”
She considers me for a moment and then nods. Strangely enough, I suspect my bonding with her brother reassures her in some way whereas once it bothered her.
Cassian has to peel her arms from around him. He looks from her to me, to each of us. “I won’t be long,” he repeats and then ducks outside. Branches rustle as he arranges them back over the cave’s entrance, dousing us in shadowy murk.
Will crouches over the supplies and soon a low glow suffuses the cave from an electric lantern. He rises. The lamp casts him in an eerie yellow light. “Someone should stand guard outside. I’ll go.”
“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” All I can think about is one of the pride finding him. Corbin finding him. I shudder, thinking about Cassian’s cousin trying to finish what he failed to do before—murdering Will. As dangerous as it is for me, it’s more so for him. My stomach dips.
“I’ll be careful and stay out of sight,” he assures me, but I’m not placated. He sighs at my grim stare. “Look, someone has to stand watch. We can’t let ourselves get cornered inside this cave.”
Aware of the threat he faces here, I shake my head, frightened to let him go out alone.
“He’s right, Jacinda,” Tamra says. She looks at Will. “We’ll take turns.”
“I’ll go with you.”
“You stay here. You need your rest. You’re no good without your strength.” He glances at Miram. “If hunters show up for her, you’ll need to defend her.”
I fold my arms across my chest. My gaze drifts to Miram. She stares at the lantern, looking so young, so vulnerable. So alone without her brother. I chafe my hands up and down my suddenly chilled arms and inch toward her. “Okay. I’ll stay.”
Like Cassian, Will leaves, pushing his way through the brush shielding the cave. He carefully repositions the branches after him.
Tamra lowers herself into a sitting position beside Deghan. After a moment, I sit beside Miram, hoping my proximity gives her some comfort. As we settle in, I wonder how Cassian is going to explain everything to the pride—the enkros, me, Will, Deghan. And Miram. I grow antsy thinking how close I am to the pride … and to the traitor responsible for my father’s death. Even knowing that I have to be patient and wait for things to get settled with Miram doesn’t appease me.
Sitting and waiting, I wonder what’s to come and whether I’ll be ready. Whether any of us will.
18
I’m laughing and running, ocean water spraying against my calves. I look behind me. Mom and Dad walk hand in hand at a slower pace, just content with this rare vacation away from the pride. Tamra is closing in, fast on my heels, but I’m faster.
Rock formations dot the beach and tower over me. They’re beautiful, curious things. Tamra catches up and we laugh, falling against each other and pointing at various outcroppings, commenting on the silly things they remind us of.
“That one looks like a clown.”
“There’s a giant rabbit—and that looks like Dad’s nose!”
“That one looks like the Eiffel Tower.”
“And that one looks like a palm tree,” Dad says, pointing over my shoulder at the rock formation that is really wide at the top and then tapers down to a thin trunklike shape.
“Hey,” Mom says, fumbling for her camera. “You two go stand under it.”
I stand beneath it, looking up at the stretch of stone over my head. It sends a faint whisper through my soul, a lot like the earth back home. The rough reddish brown outcropping fascinates me, and Mom has to shout my name for me to look at the camera. I turn and smile, tilting my head so that it rests against my sister.
Then Dad’s there, draping an arm around me. He points to the umbrella of rock above us. “A palm tree, Jacinda.” He says this again, smiling.
I nod, smiling back. “Pretty cool.”
Everything else fades away then. Mom. Tamra. The sound of the surf. It’s just Dad, his eyes gleaming down at me. “No, it’s a palm tree, Jacinda …”
Then it all rushes back over me.
I push myself up and identify Miram curled on her side on top of her sleeping bag beside me. We must have fallen asleep talking. I wanted to cheer her up, take her mind off everything.
As my vision adjusts to the gloom of the cave, a stab of disappointment fills me. I still see Dad so very clearly, the image of him crisp and fresh. Almost as if I weren’t dreaming an event from my past at all, but living it again.
Suddenly the back of my throat aches. I can almost smell the cold sea wind. Dad’s voice whispers inside my ears. Palm tree.
My heart jumps in my chest and my pulse begins a furious hammering against my neck. I don’t need to see the slip of paper my mother left me to remember the words scrawled upon it.
Remember the palm tree.
At the time, the words hadn’t made any sense to me. I trusted that it would come to me, that I would figure it out eventually. And now I have.
I hop to my feet, anxious to give Tamra the news. I know where Mom is. We can go find her! Then I stop, my breath expelling in a rush as I remember I can’t go anywhere. Not yet. I’m here to get justice for Dad. To help Miram. For Cassian … the pride. I have a lot to fix before I’m free to find Mom. I made that decision. This is the reality I’ve chosen—and dragged Will into with me.
Tamra’s chosen something different. I know that’s her right … but maybe if we have a firm destination, Mom’s actual location, she’ll come with me.
I resume walking, eager to tell Tamra.
She’s nowhere around though. Neither is Deghan. My stomach sinks. It’s not hard to guess that they went off somewhere together.
“Tamra?” I call, wondering how long I slept, how long she’s been gone.
I walk deeper into the cave, where the lamplight is at its weakest, barely stretching its glow across the cave floor. Suddenly the cave splits, opens to a larger room on the left and a darker, narrower space to my right. I peer into the smaller tunnel. The air feels cooler in that direction.
I glance at the larger space, into the yawning shadows there. Something moves in all the gloom. Like the ripple of a fish against dark waters. I squint and step closer, making out a shape there. I part my lips, ready to call out—
A hand clamps down on my shoulder. “Jacinda?”
I yelp and spin around. A burst of fire erupts from my lips before I see who’s there and manage to retract the heat back inside. Will stands behind me, flinging his hands back in the air like I’m pointing a weapon at him.