Beautiful Disaster (Beautiful #1)

"No, Sir. As I said, it's kind of irrational. I know you chose me, and yes, I am quite aware that you see more in me than a pair of tits and an ass you can spank at will."

"But?"

It's a little like pulling teeth, having to drag everything out of her like this, but I know eventually my patience will pay off. Bella sighs, somewhat dejectedly, and lowers her voice to the point where I'm wondering if she's trying to break role or just feeling stupid for voicing her thoughts.

"I'm having a bad case of stage fright. You know, like I'll do something incredibly infantile or mess up, and they'll all either pity me or ask themselves how much you must have hurt your head to stoop so low to take someone like me as your sub. When you could have had any of them.

Again."

It hurts me to see her confidence waver like that, but before I can chime in she goes on, her voice regaining strength fast.

"Not that I care so much. I know you love me, the same as I love you. I know they know I'm still more or less new to this so if I mess up they'll probably ignore it anyway. I wish I just wouldn't care what anyone thinks about me, but I want to be your super duper fantastic sub you can be proud of and -"

She trails off, then swallows convulsively and her eyes leave my face as she forces herself to go on.

"And parade around and show everyone how lucky you are to have me. I want to be insanely happy and lose myself in feeling loved and cherished by you, as your sub, and have a real reason for that. And not feel stupid for just having said that, Sir."

I have to admit, her little diatribe is highly amusing, and I pinch her ass cheek lightly until she makes a face.

"You know you don't have to do anything there? We don't have to do anything there? Just stand around, talk, enjoy the company is fine, too."

Bella nods, and after chewing on her lip she catches my gaze again.

"Thank you, Sir. I appreciate your lenience with me here. But I know you want to play, and so do I. It's just that I'm a little afraid you'll push me and I'll make an ass of myself because of some idiocy and disappoint you."

"You can't disappoint me, Bella."

She smiles again at my reassurance, but isn't convinced.

"It has happened in the past. And not to be pesky, Master, but you do have a habit of pushing me beyond my comfort zone. Or you used to."

I'm surprised how dejected the last part sounds, but decide to store that away for a later conversation, after all this is over.

"Do you mean you expect me to do that tomorrow? To embarrass you in front of everyone by inadvertently making you mess up because I pressure you too much?"

I try not to sound hurt but I think I'm not doing a good job, from the way she tenses up. I'm even more surprised when she nods.

"Seriously?"

My unbelieving snort causes her to look away once more, but a quick slap on her ass has her attention focused on my face once again.

"That actually wasn't a hypothetical question."

"I am. Kind of."

"Kind of?"

She cringes at my hard tone but nods.

"Yes."

I don't really know what to say. I mean I can tell that she's trying to get a rouse out of me, and part of me thinks that alone warrants a quick and painful reminder that it's not her place to attempt that - as we don't play things this way. But I don't think whacking her ass good today will help the problem at hand that I haven't realized exists until a few minutes ago.

"What do you think I should do now?" I ask instead.

She seems puzzled for a moment and her composure crumbles a little, but after a little fidgeting she straightens again, looking more confident.

"I think you shouldn't give me the option not to play tomorrow. And you should plan for something that is a little challenging for me, not enough to make me fail but still press me. I think it would make both of us feel good if that works. And if it doesn't, we can still laugh over it for the next few years."

I actually like her suggestion, and it reminds me of our conversation after our switching scene. Building confidence alright. And I feel like kissing her when she adds, somewhat dejectedly, "And you should probably spank me soundly for trying to make you do all that instead of just telling you that idea of mine straight out."

Her eyes are gleaming when I dig my hands into her ass, then let them drop to her thighs. My thoughts are racing, trying to decide what to do with her tomorrow and whether I should tell her about it now, when I realize something else.

"Get up and fetch me the print-outs that are in the red folder on the desk."

She inclines her head and shimmies off me, then scurries off to do my bidding. I have to grin when she returns, her hands still behind her back, with the papers clasped in her mouth. I wait until she has resumed her previous position, then tug the print-outs from between her lips.

"Know what that is?"

"A list. List of limits for tomorrow, I presume."

I nod, then lean forward into her so I can grab a pencil from the coffee table. Bella shudders slightly when my breath skims over her nipples but remains still otherwise, even when I push the papers against her stomach so I can take notes on them.

"Did you read it through?"

"No, Sir, I just took a glance."

I nod, then quickly browse the items on the list I've typed earlier. It's a very abbreviated list, only with the activities I would consider important for an event like this, knowing what Bella likes and what Beth's playroom holds -

although the latter is clearly not as limiting as the former.

"We'll work through it now, together, and I want you to tell me yes or no on every item depending on whether you'll want to engage in that activity tomorrow or not, and if so, rate them from one - not desirable to five - highly anticipated."

She doesn't hesitate with answering, and none of her options surprises me as almost all of those that deviate from the first lists of things she wanted to try after first meeting Beth are things we've explored together. Bella is more than okay with light impact play, light bondage and sex, I'm quite happy she puts heavy impact play still at a three, and as usual, what she shuts me down on are her feet, but still at a one. The only thing that causes her to quirm is me actually jutting down the numbers on the paper where the pencil tickles her skin, but I ignore that mostly.

Then there's only one thing left to ask.

"What do you think of playing with others?"

Her inhale sounds a little pressed, and I watch her swallow repeatedly before she answers.

"I'm not okay doing anything without you involved, Sir."

"And if I'm involved?"

Another shaky breath escapes her, and I can tell she's waring with herself to find an answer.

"Voice your thoughts."

My command clearly surprises her, but after a moment she inclines her head in defeat.

"I guess it would be kind of hot to involve someone else, at least on a small scale. But I don't want anyone except you to fuck me. And I don't know if I'm comfortable with having someone I don't know touch me."

"Because you don't trust them?"

"Exactly."

"What if I trust them?"

I can tell that she wants to tell me that she's not comfortable with that anyway, and it won't surprise me if she tells me she only considers Beth as okay to be included. A few moments pass and I don't feel the need to stress her, instead I leave her the time she needs to find her answer.

"If you trust them, then I say yes. But with reservations, so one."

I gently stroke her ass for taking that step I haven't expected her to, and I can see a hint of pride glowing on her face. That pretty much decides things for me, and after jutting down that last note I put the paper and pencil down on the table.

"Very well. Then let's talk about that punishment."

She swallows thickly but doesn't react any other way, clearly prepared to take whatever I wish to dish out in silence.

"You are right, I cannot let it slip that you think it's okay to hold something back from me, but I don't think it's a capital offense as you used the next chance you got to be open with me. A spanking will do, and you will go unsatisfied until we get to the party tomorrow."

"Thank you, Master."

As usual my cock screams bloody murder that I inadvertantly cheat myself of fucking her - because I know Bella well enough that even if I don't let her come she will still have a good time on the way there until I stop her - but I do my best to ignore my dick. Instead I tell Bella to lie down on my lap, ass up, and she quickly assumes position. I pat her softly on her supple rump for putting her hands yes again behind her back even though that means that her tits and face are pressed firmly into the couch. Grasping her arms as I press them into her lower back, I start.

Her whole body goes rigid when I slap her ass hard, not dallying with any warm-up. I know I'm really hurting her that way but as this is intended as punishment, I don't really care. Small gasps and mewling sounds escape her as I continue to spank her, hard and fast, and as my palm begins to sting her ass cheeks get redder and redder by the minute.

Pausing for a moment I rub her hot skin gently, and she relaxes a bit. I smirk when I feel her crotch rub against my erection while she spreads her legs slightly but I ignore both. If it were playful spanking I'd rub her clit and finger fuck her now to take the sting off the spanking, but today her wet pussy goes unattended.

"We should talk about what you'll be wearing tomorrow," I start as I pick up slapping her butt. Bella squirms at the first slaps but then quiets, her pants and hisses loud in the silence between my words. I've initially thought that the black leather corset would be a good choice, but I know she'll associate it with our scene now, and after what we just talked about, that's not going to happen.

She wants to be my perfect sub? I'm only too happy to oblige her then.

I go on explaining while I continue to spank her ass, now somewhat less forcefully but still enough to make her squirm once in a while.

"I want you to wear your new blue corset, the softer satin one. Do you have anything suitable to wear underneath?"

I seriously don't know ninety percent of the clothes Bella owns. I know she has the two corsets she got as a present from me. I know some of her more sexy underwear, and one dress that drives me crazy. But the rest are just that, clothes, and I generally don't really care about them as I'm more interested in what they hide than how they represent her beautiful body.

"Like a blouse, Sir?"

"Think again," I grunt, the three subsequent slaps harder than those before.

Bella groans while she presses her face into the cushions of the couch, trying to stifle the sounds. When I ease up again a little she comes forth with a much better suggestion.

"I have a more or less see-through top Alice brought me from Spain. The black one I usually wear with a tank top underneath?"

That rings a very dim bell, but it sounds sufficient.

"You will wear that top underneath the corset, but of course without a bra or anything else."

Bella slumps at hearing my words and the clear implication that while theoretically dressed, her tits will be quite on display above the underbust corset, but of course she doesn't object.

"You told me you got a suitable skirt?"

"Yes, Sir, a short wrap around one with a tie at the waistband."

"You will wear that. No panties. No stockings or hose, and I want you barefoot."

Increasing the force behind the spanking one last time I add, "And you will wear a leather collar so everyone sees at once that you're my beautiful sub."

My last slap is by far the hardest, hard enough to be painful for me, too, and Bella screams loud for a second or two. She instantly relaxes when I let go of her and rub her aching butt gently. Now unrestrained she brings her hands underneath her head, cushioning her face as she eases herself further into my touch. I'm impressed that she's taken the spanking so well, and the devious part of my mind is quite gleeful about the fact that tomorrow her ass will be sore still and might bear a few light bruises.

Those thoughts only worsen the ache in my cock, and I decide it's about time to ease that strain.

"Up you go," I nudge her lightly, and Bella flops off my lap into a crouch, a lot less gracefully than before. Her near silent groan when she stretches makes my dick jump, and I nod down at the bulge in my jeans. "Do something about that."

Bella licks her lips, then looks a little sheepish as she kneels down before me, reaching for the button on my fly.

"With pleasure, Master."

Her mouth is hot and wet when she takes my cock in, one of her hands wrapped around my shaft, the other gently massaging my balls. I thread my hands into her hair to ease her into the right rhythm but otherwise let her work as she sucks me off, her red ass as much of a visual turn-on as my cock disappearing between her lips.

It doesn't take her long to make me come deep down her throat, and I just smirk at the face she briefly makes at the taste of my jizz. I think between the two of us, I'm the one who minds less, which kind of adds to the fun for me. Once she's done packing me up again I pat the couch next to me, making her crawl closer where she curls up as I hug her, still buck naked and clearly content.

I kiss her hair softly as I turn on the TV, and we spend the evening like that.

I still have to grin everytime she re-arranges herself and emits a low groan or gasp of discomfort, but she never complains, and I love her even more for being what she is, even though she sometimes still seems to need some reassurance - my perfect woman.

Chapter 15

I can tell that Bella is incredibly nervous when she straightens before me for a last inspection. She is absolutely stunning and I hate myself for being so dumb to actually think - even for a moment - that it's a good idea to go to the party. Because I really need to fuck her, right now, and I know that if I give in we won't even get out of our bedroom for the next hours.

Sometimes I really wonder why I've ever been proud of my self-restraint, too.

Normally Bella is all for understated make-up, but just like with our last scene, today she has put real effort into her appearance. Her hair is freshly washed and cascades down her shoulders in shining, brown curls, a few strands gathered at the back of her head to keep them clear off her face.

Her eyes look even more expressive than usual with the heavy dark makeup, and her lips shine with the softest of pink hues. That I notice all this is my effort to keep from staring at the rest of her body too much, I have to admit, but she did a great job that actually deserves to be admired -

I'm just not the right guy for that.

What's more distracting is what she's wearing, just what I told her to yesterday. The short-sleeved dark top is so sheer that I have no problems watching her nipples harden under my scrutiny, where her breasts are slightly supported by the corset stopping right underneath them. The bright cyan satin of the corset, set off by a patterns of golden leaves and swirls, covers her from there on down to the swell of her hips. Already her waist is tightly constrained by the garment and I can't wait to tighten the laces further once we are at Beth's, but I figure I'll leave her more breathing capacity for the car ride. The outfit is completed by a black wrap skirt that hits her mid-thigh when she's standing straight, but rides up to not even cover her ass when she bends down enough to put her palms onto the floor. I love how that leaves her pussy completely exposed, but I only slap her ass instead of grope her to make her straighten up again. She yelps loudly when my palm hits her butt where a few patches of skin are still red from yesterday.

"Beautiful," I murmur when she's facing me again, my words easing her visibly as she exhales slowly.

I get up and nod at the remaining garments I had her pick before - a long, flowing skirt to hide her legs down to her ankles, and a light sweater to cover her chest.

My own outfit needs a lot less work to be safe for the street as I don't really stick out with my black leather pants, gray shirt and dress shoes.

When she's done slipping on her sandals I pick up the pre-packed gym bag already waiting by the door, and we leave, Bella's fingers tightly wrapped around my own hand until she has to let go to climb into the passenger seat of the car.

I try to make light conversation but only get monosyllabic answers from her so I put on a CD instead and hope the music does a better job easing her tension a little. I'm still happy that before she gets out of the car again Bella suddenly leans over and kisses me hungrily, excitement winning over fear for a few moments.

"Try to relax a bit. Nothing bad's gonna happen, you know that. After all this party is under Beth's supervision, and she'd have my ass if I didn't take good care of you."

She nods, and I smile when she takes a few deep breaths.

"You know, I think I'll be really glad when you finally get to do what you wanna do to me, because the tension's killing me!"

I kiss her instead of an answer, much slower and gentle, making her melt into me and relax - until I reach up and pinch her nipple hard through the soft fabric of the sweater. Her yelp around my tongue makes my cock itch, and I pull away from Bella before we get stranded in the car.

"Come on, then, can't wait to get you out of all that loose fabric."

I catch her rolling her eyes at me when I turn my back on her, but I let it slide - for now. Weirdly enough she seems to calm down further as we walk down the street to our destination, just two people strolling around town on a cloudy Saturday mid-morning. Once inside the atrium of Beth's house I ring the bell next to the unassuming door down into the basement, knowing that today it will be locked to ensure privacy to anyone inside.

Bella self-consciously picks some invisible lint off her sweater, then jumps a little as the door opens, her hand squeezing mine for support. I'm not surprised to see Raven, Beth's somewhat obnoxious employee look us over, then quickly step aside to let us in.

"Master Edward, welcome," she chimes, beaming at me after a very quick glance at Bella.

I do my best to rein in the scowl that wants to take over my forehead, then hug Bella closer while I smile down at her. Even jumpy as she is I can tell she didn't miss Raven more or less ignoring her, and it clearly doesn't sit well with her.

"Hi, Raven, I think you've met my lovely fiancée Bella before?"

Instantly slipping out of her sub persona she has been letting roam free pretty much since yesterday evening Bella smiles brightly at the dark-haired woman in front of her, while her gaze is clearly challenging.

"Oh hi, Raven, so nice to see you here! I didn't expect Beth to actually invite her employees for the party, but I guess someone has to man the door to leave our wonderful hostess to her duties?"

Raven blinks, then stares at me as if to urge me into action, but I remain still with my suddenly much less fake smile on my face.