“I don’t know about that,” I said. Around us, the air burned with the rising storm that had responded to my emotions. “There’s one person who would do it right now.”
“Two,” said Dorian.
“Three,” gasped Jasmine.
Maiwenn smiled again. “As you wish.” She began to back up, Kiyo at her side. “Remember—any sign that we’re followed, and she dies.”
The two disappeared into the trees. I caught hold of Jasmine’s hand and gave her as reassuring a smile as I could manage. “It’ll be over soon.” I glanced up at Dorian, and my smile disappeared. “She was bluffing, right? Her range can’t be that far. We can go after her once she releases Jasmine. If she does. She’s hardly given us reason to trust her.”
Dorian brushed some hair out of his face. He looked weary. “No, but I think she’ll avoid another kill if she can. She had some brave words about how killing Pagiel was nothing, but she knows each offense carries consequences.”
“Pagiel ...” I murmured.
I looked over at where he lay near Jasmine and felt a sickening sensation in my stomach. I reached out and closed his eyes, then ran a finger over his cheek. It wasn’t fair what she’d done to him. None of this was fair. He was technically older than me in human years, but for all intents and purposes, so much younger. Young and so full of potential. He’d been thrust into a fate he hadn’t asked for, confused by what he wanted and what others expected of him. He’d been killed because of words spoken long before he was born, and now all the wonders he might have done in the world were extinguished.
Dorian slipped an arm around me and kissed the side of my head. “I know,” he said simply.
Jasmine suddenly gasped, like she’d been under water and could only now take a breath. “Shit,” she said, examining her arms and legs critically.
“Better?” I asked, brushing aside my tears. It only freed up space for more.
She nodded, but her entire face crumpled when she looked over at Pagiel. “No,” she said. “It can’t be true. Not really ...” She shook his arm, willing him to wake up, but as the truth slowly dawned on her, she burst into sobs that made my stray tears look like nothing. Moments of true affection had been rare in our relationship, but I knew then that she was young and she needed me and that I would be there for her.
I wrapped my arms around her, and she cried into my shoulder. “It’s okay,” I told her, stroking her hair. “You’re okay. Everything’s going to be okay.” I didn’t really know if that was true or not. At the moment, it seemed unlikely. But as I held her, I realized I was grateful that she was alive and still in my life. Her words about “always being the hostage” echoed in my mind, and I met Dorian’s sympathetic eyes.
“My loved ones are always used against me,” I said softly. “Why?” It had been a recurring theme. Varia had used it to keep me in check in the Yew Land. Jasmine had been held hostage twice today. It was again one of those moments where I marveled that I could still control a storm above us and be so helpless in other situations, especially when it came to those I cared about.
“Because that’s what heartless people do,” Dorian said. “They prey on those who love.”
Taking Pagiel back to his family was one of the hardest things I’d ever had to do. I couldn’t hold animosity against Ysabel and Edria, not for their bitchy personalities and not even for withholding the truth about Pagiel’s heritage. Their grief was too great, and underneath all their schemes, they were ordinary women who had loved and lost someone. I would’ve wailed and lashed out at the world too if it had been Isaac in Pagiel’s place—which it very well could have been.
It was understandable that part of their grief would transform to rage. They wanted to blame everyone for his death, me especially. The thing was, I’d already beaten myself up over the events of that day, wondering if I could have done something differently. Dorian talked them down, finally convincing them that Maiwenn was the culprit here. The method of Pagiel’s death, gruesome as it was, was proof of that, at least. Ysabel and Edria demanded war on Maiwenn’s kingdom, but he kept his own counsel on that.
I kept my own counsel on him. There was a lot to contend with in the aftermath of Pagiel’s death, giving me little time to talk to Dorian. I watched him a lot and found that I missed the time we’d had together. I hadn’t forgotten that he’d stood with me in the end. He’d proven himself time and time again. Now it was up to me.
Still, the timing proved difficult. We were both always so busy. The most I was able to talk to him was the day I left for Tucson, and even that was short-lived.
“I have to go back for a while,” I told him. “I don’t know how long. There are a lot of loose ends to tie up.”
Dorian nodded. “I understand.”
I glanced away. “I wanted to say ... well, thank you. Thank you for everything, for standing by me. I never should have doubted you. And I know there’s still a lot to figure out—”
He cupped my face, forcing me to look at him. “Eugenie, Eugenie. I told you before. There’s nothing for me to figure out. I know what I want. I want you. Not just as a bedmate or war ally. I want you with me, always. I want to share the same jokes and look into your eyes when I wake up. I think someday—hopefully sooner rather than later—you’ll want this too. Until then, I’ll be here, waiting for you.”
He gave me a light kiss, and that was our good-bye. It left me breathless and continued to haunt me as I returned to Tucson. Even so, I still had plenty of other things to distract me. Mom and Roland and I were making plans about bringing the twins to Tucson, something that filled me with eagerness. I was anxious to see them and had little patience for all the things that needed to be done first.
Not all of my loose ends were unpleasant, though. Although I was sure Candace and Charles would happily give us all the baby gear they’d acquired, my mom and I still spent a lot of time stocking up on our own. Those moments were some of the most peaceful I’d had, and I would spend ages in stores touching and examining baby clothes, wondering how big Ivy and Isaac had grown.
I was at an outdoor mall one day with my mom, scoping out cribs. They’d all looked fine to me, but she’d gotten into a lengthy discussion with the salesperson, grilling him on every safety detail. I’d begged out to grab a cup of coffee, promising to return soon. I don’t think either noticed I had left. I found a coffee shop on the other side of the shopping center and had just received my latte when a familiar voice behind me said, “Eugenie.”
I spun around so quickly that half of my coffee sloshed out. Kiyo stood before me.
The throngs of people around us disappeared, and the focus of my world narrowed down only to him. All the anger and grief I’d felt, as well as watching others cope with their own sorrow these last couple weeks, surged up in me. Maybe Kiyo hadn’t dealt the killing blow, but he might as well have. I couldn’t believe he’d even had the audacity to cross my path. I’d figured he was smarter than that.
“Watch it,” he warned, glancing upward. I was doing the subconscious storm thing again, and a few people had stopped to stare in amazement at the dark clouds that had literally come out of nowhere. “You don’t want to create a panic.”
“Wouldn’t be the weirdest weather phenomenon that’s happened around here,” I said. “Neither would you being struck by lightning.”
He smiled without humor. “You won’t do it, though. Not in this crowd.”
He was right. I could call lightning with pretty perfect precision, but even so, we were in the thick of humanity, with people brushing past us to get where they needed. I could hit him but might inadvertently hurt someone else along the way. These aren’t even people I know or care about, I thought bitterly. But once again, my hands are tied.
“I suppose you arranged this,” I said. “Waited for a chance to approach me in public?”
“Yes, actually. I figured I wouldn’t get a warm reception at one of your castles.”
“You figured right.”
He sighed. “Eugenie ... there are a couple things I need to tell you. I debated a long time about whether I should, but ... well, I don’t know. I feel bad about what happened with Pagiel ... and everything else.”
I had to repress the urge to slap him. “Yeah? Maybe you should’ve thought about that before your fucking girlfriend killed him!” My profanity got a few surprised glances from passersby.
“I’m sorry it turned out that way,” he said. “But it was better for everyone.”
I started to turn away. “Maybe I have to let you live today, but I don’t have to listen to your ‘greater good’ bullshit again.”
“Wait, Eugenie—” He grabbed my shoulder. I immediately jerked his hand off but did come to a stop. “Please. There are two things you have to know.”
I crossed my arms over my chest. “Hurry up.”
He took a deep breath. “First ... your children ... they may still be in danger.”
“I ... what? How?” I demanded. “Isaac’s no longer part of the prophecy.”
“Maiwenn’s not so sure. She’s afraid that maybe the prophecy will simply roll to Storm King’s next oldest grandson.”
I couldn’t even speak right away. “Out of all the fucked-up things I’ve heard—and believe me, I’ve heard a lot—that has got to take the prize. Do you know how nuts that sounds?”
“I didn’t say I felt that way,” he said. There was enough uncertainty in his voice to kill his credibility.
“If you didn’t feel that way, you’d stand up to her and stop running her errands.”
He shook his head. “I can’t abandon her. Not yet. We agree on a lot of other things, and I’m not going to go hunting your kids anytime soon. I’m just trying to warn you that others might.”