“It just takes practice,” I assured him, not wanting to make a big deal of it. Evan knew I had a shamanic background, but I didn’t want the extent of my power made that obvious. “Come on—we should get home.” I was already looking back on what I’d done with regret. In that moment, there’d been no question. I’d had to help Evan. But in doing so, I’d exposed myself.
Candace’s grim face confirmed as much when we got back to her place. “That ghost won’t tell any tales in the Underworld, at least,” she said with a sigh. “And if he was tied to that house, it’s unlikely he had contact with anyone who might be after you.”
“That’s what I was hoping,” I said.
“Still. You shouldn’t have done it, if only because you and those little ones could have been hurt.” Her gaze lifted toward the kitchen, where Charles was bandaging up Evan. “He’s got a lot to learn, but he’s tougher than he looks.”
“I know,” I said, feeling terrible. The ride home had given me a lot of time to consider my actions. One of the twins chose that moment to kick, just in case it wasn’t obvious that I’d put them at risk. “I just reacted. He was in trouble, and the wand was right there.”
Candace’s look was almost sympathetic as she rested a hand on my arm. “I know. And I know that’s your nature—especially if you’re anything like Roland. That man never did know how to stay out of trouble. But for now, you’ve got to let go. Next time you fight a ghost, it may tell the ones who are after you where you’re at.”
I nodded meekly. Further conversation was put on hold as Charles and Evan rejoined us. Evan stopped in the doorway to the living room and pointed at the TV set. “That’s where you’re from, isn’t it?”
I turned and saw a news report on a grocery store robbery in Tucson. The security camera footage was spotty, frequently going to static, but it showed a few bizarre shots of what looked like items flying off the shelves. Eyewitness reports were equally odd, and if I hadn’t known it was completely impossible, I would’ve thought the store had been hit by a ghost. But a ghost had no use for money—or, in this case, food, since that’s what had been stolen.
“Weird,” I said, once the story ended. If some other type of Otherworldly creature had been involved, I had no doubt Roland would deal with it. Knowing that made me feel even more ineffectual. Roland had theoretically retired, but my various actions over the last year had forced him to take on the role of an active shaman once more.
“It is,” remarked Candace. “But it hardly fits the usual—”
Her jaw dropped as a low rumbling sound filled the house. All of us stared at each other in confusion. Another rumble sounded, just as I saw the living room windows light up. My senses were suddenly flooded, seconds before the others realized what was happening.
“It’s raining,” exclaimed Evan. He hurried to the door, the rest of us right behind him.
Out on the porch, we watched in wonder as rain poured down in sheets while lightning ripped apart the sky. A fierce wind picked up, blowing the rain at us, but nobody cared. Charles laughed and stepped off the porch, holding his hands skyward.
“This’ll fix my garden right up,” he declared.
Evan turned to me in amazement. “You were right. She said this would happen, Aunt Candy. This afternoon—the sky was clear blue, and she swore there’d be a storm.”
Candace smiled and turned to watch Charles, oblivious to the true nature of my insight. “I guess some people just have a knack for the weather.”
“You have no idea,” I murmured.
Chapter 9
Despite our conclusions that I probably hadn’t raised any notice in the Otherworld, I still spent the next week on pins and needles. I jumped at shadows, expecting gentry assassins to come bursting through my window at any moment. Candace played it cool and casual as usual, but I noticed she too was more watchful than before. One evening, a friend of hers came by, a wizened woman with an accent so thick I could barely understand her. Candace claimed the friend was visiting for tea, but later, I noticed them walking around the yard. I never asked Candace about it, but I suspected her friend was a witch who had laid some protective wards for us.
My worries continued to be unfounded, and that slow, easy life resumed. Even doing customer service for Candace became more comfortable, and I simply learned to take the silliness in stride. Probably the part of my life that continued to bother me most was my longing for my kingdoms. I would often wake up in the middle of the night with a burning in my chest and tears in my eyes. I’d remember the clean, crisp perfume of the deserts of the Thorn Land or the soft, rolling hills of the Rowan Land. Most of the need was still on my own side, but every once in a while, I’d sense a faint whisper, as though the lands were starting to miss me too.
To my surprise, I also found myself missing Dorian. After finding out I was pregnant, I’d seen him almost every week in the Otherworld. Not having his sarcasm and wit around anymore seemed weird, leaving an empty spot within me. Weirder still was that, aside from that last idyllic week, he and I hadn’t really spent much tender or recreational time together. It had always been business, making plans for our kingdoms and figuring out how best to thwart Maiwenn and Kiyo. Nonetheless, I’d simply gotten used to having him around. No matter our personal differences, we worked well as a team.
Occasionally, more troubling thoughts about him would plague me. Lying in bed at night, sweating from the Alabama heat, I’d find myself sifting back farther in my memories, to the time when he and I had been involved. I was rapidly reaching a point in my pregnancy where sex sounded like the least appealing thing ever. But in my memories, it was still easy. There had been a lot of nights in the Thorn Land, when Dorian had been with me and we’d lain in bed in similar kinds of heat, sweaty and restless. Even in those conditions, we hadn’t been able to keep our hands off of each other. His skin had felt like fire against mine as he moved in me, his mouth equally hot wherever it touched me. The heat around us had seemed inconsequential to that between us.
Recalling that night did more than just torment my body. It tormented my mind. I still hadn’t gotten over the way he and I had parted. Dorian still cares about me. Dorian maybe even loves me.
How did I feel about that? How did I feel about him?
Although the weather in Huntsville remained hot, summer was winding down, and with its end, Evan would be returning to school. He began spending more time with me, still in that polite, hands-off way. Sometimes I’d catch him looking at me in a manner that made me nervous, and I feared some outpouring of affection. It never came, showing he was just as patient and content as he’d claimed to be. He further proved the point while we were out fishing one day.
I’d never been fishing before. It wasn’t something you really did a lot of in Tucson. We were out on a small, quiet lake ringed in willows, in a no-frills motorboat that had just enough room for us, our catch, and a cooler stocked with Coke, juice, and Milky Ways. Evan was very critical about everything we caught, and it was important to him that we caught no more than we could eat. Anything else was a waste, he declared.
“Uncle Chuck makes a mean batter for these,” Evan told me. “We can have a fish fry tonight.”
That sounded great to me then and there. I was starving, but then, I always seemed to be lately. My appetite had shot up out of nowhere these last couple weeks, much to Candace’s delight. While I certainly didn’t try to halt my eating, every extra bite was a reminder that I was going to get bigger and bigger. As it was, my weight had shot up exponentially too. It was still mostly confined to my stomach, but every day, I felt a little slower and a little more uncomfortable.
I finished off a Milky Way to curb my hunger, fully knowing no obstetrician would endorse it as sound nutrition. I chased it with a thermos of cider, giving me a brief flashback to the Oak Land harvest parties. Those bonfires and crisp nights, paired with Dorian’s smile, seemed like a lifetime away.
“I think there are some rules about pregnancy and fish,” I told Evan, returning to the present. “It’s probably in one of the pamphlets the doctors gave me.”
“Ah, that’d be a shame,” Evan said, casting his line out. A breeze off the water eased some of the heat and ruffled his hair. “If you can’t have any now, we’ll make sure you have a double helping after the babies come. If you’re still here, that is. Have you thought much about it?”
I watched my own bobber drift lazily in the water. As far as I could tell, I was doing exactly what he was with technique, but he kept catching more fish. “Honestly, no. Mostly I’m just trying to get through the pregnancy, but I’ll have to figure out the rest soon enough.” I sighed. “Do you think I should stick around?” It was a foolish question, I realized, seeing as he didn’t have nearly enough background to understand the consequences of that decision.
He shrugged. “Doesn’t matter what I think. I like having you here, but in the end you have to do what you want and what you think is best.”
I almost laughed. “I don’t think anyone’s ever said that to me before.”
“What’s that? To do what you want?” His bobber disappeared in the water, and he gave the line an experimental tug, revealing he’d indeed hooked another fish. Damn. How’d he keep doing that?
“Yup,” I said. “I’ve had a lot of well-meaning people in my life, but most haven’t been shy about telling me what they think I should do.”
Evan reeled the fish in and deemed its size adequate. “People will always do that—and you said the magic words. Well-meaning. Most have good intentions for you at heart, but only you can make the final call.”
I thought back to the last time I’d seen Kiyo, when he’d been trying to kill me in an effort to stop our children from being born. That didn’t really qualify as “good intentions.” Dorian’s heavy-handed protection of me had looked out for my well-being, but it had been tainted with his own ambition. If push came to shove, I still wasn’t sure if he’d side with me or the prophecy. And yet, even as I thought that, I remembered our last meeting, when Dorian had admitted to having no ulterior motives, save to make me happy and rebuild our trust. It was hard to know what to believe anymore.