"First, I thought, almost despairing,
This must crush my spirit now;
Yet I bore it, and am bearing--
Only do not ask me how."
HEINE.
When the daylight came, it brought the possibility of action, but with
it little of consolation. With the first visible increase of light,
I gazed into the chasm, but could not, for more than an hour, see
sufficiently well to discover its nature. At last I saw it was almost a
perpendicular opening, like a roughly excavated well, only very large.
I could perceive no bottom; and it was not till the sun actually rose,
that I discovered a sort of natural staircase, in many parts little more
than suggested, which led round and round the gulf, descending spirally
into its abyss. I saw at once that this was my path; and without a
moment's hesitation, glad to quit the sunlight, which stared at me most
heartlessly, I commenced my tortuous descent. It was very difficult.
In some parts I had to cling to the rocks like a bat. In one place, I
dropped from the track down upon the next returning spire of the stair;
which being broad in this particular portion, and standing out from the
wall at right angles, received me upon my feet safe, though somewhat
stupefied by the shock.
After descending a great way, I found the stair
ended at a narrow opening which entered the rock horizontally. Into this
I crept, and, having entered, had just room to turn round. I put my head
out into the shaft by which I had come down, and surveyed the course of
my descent. Looking up, I saw the stars; although the sun must by this
time have been high in the heavens. Looking below, I saw that the sides
of the shaft went sheer down, smooth as glass; and far beneath me, I saw
the reflection of the same stars I had seen in the heavens when I looked
up. I turned again, and crept inwards some distance, when the passage
widened, and I was at length able to stand and walk upright. Wider and
loftier grew the way; new paths branched off on every side; great open
halls appeared; till at last I found myself wandering on through an
underground country, in which the sky was of rock, and instead of trees
and flowers, there were only fantastic rocks and stones. And ever as I
went, darker grew my thoughts, till at last I had no hope whatever of
finding the white lady: I no longer called her to myself MY white lady.
Whenever a choice was necessary, I always chose the path which seemed to
lead downwards.