Seth’s brows rose curiously. “Okay.”
I took a deep breath and stared down at my toes again.
“Thank you for doing whatever… it was you did to find us. If it wasn’t for you then I’d probably be dead—or slicing and dicing someone right now. So… thank you.”
He was silent for so long I checked out what he was doing. Seth just stared at me with this dumb look on his face. To keep from smiling, I looked away. “What?”
“I think that’s possibly the nicest thing you have said to me. Ever.”
I laughed. “No it’s not. I’ve said nice things to you before.”
“Like what?”
There had to be another situation when I’d said something nice. “Like… when… ” I couldn’t think of anything. Jeez, I was a bitch. “Okay. That is the first nice thing I’ve said to you.”
“I think I need a moment to recognize and cherish this.”
I rol ed my eyes. “Moving on, what did you want to talk about?”
Seth turned serious. “I wanted to be up front on a few things with you.”
“Like what?” I scooted back against the pil ows lining the top of the bed, moving my legs so they weren’t touching him.
His brows furrowed. “Like what the future has in store for us.”
I sighed. “Seth, nothing is going to happen between—”
“Aren’t you even a little bit curious as to how I found you?
Don’t you want to know how I did that?”
“Yeah, come to think of it, I would like to know.”
Seth leaned back on one arm, twisting onto his side. The movement sent locks of golden hair forward, sliding over his jaw. His hip was far too close to my curled toes. Not that he seemed to care. “I was having a real y good dream about this chick I met in Houston and we were—”
I groaned. “Seth.”
“Al of a sudden, I was hurled out of the dream. I woke up, and my heart was racing, sweat pouring. I had no idea why.
I felt sick—sick to my soul.”
I pul ed my knees to my chest. “Why?”
“Getting there, Alex. It took me a while to realize nothing was wrong with me, but the feeling wouldn’t go away. Then I felt it—the first tag. It was like I was on fire and the pain—it was something real. For a second, I actual y thought I had been tagged. It struck me then. It was you I was feeling. I went to Aiden—”
“Why did you go to him?”
“Because I figured if anyone knew where you were, it would be him. Lot of help he proved to be, though. He had no clue.”
How did he come to that conclusion? That was something better left untouched for now. “So you felt what I was feeling?”
Seth nodded. “Every. Single. Tag. Like it was my skin being ripped into and my aether being drained. I never felt anything like it.” He looked away. A few moments passed before he spoke again. “I don’t know how you… dealt with it. It felt like my soul was being torn apart, but it was your soul.”
Sort of struck dumb by what he was explaining, I listened quietly.
“Once we realized you weren’t in your room, Aiden figured out what you had done. We left immediately, and I can barely explain how I knew where to go. It was like something was leading me. Instinct maybe?” He shrugged, staring down at his hand. “I don’t know. I just knew to head west, and when we got close to the Tennessee line, Aiden said you once mentioned Gatlinburg. As soon as he said that, I knew where you were.”
“But how? Did any of this happen before? When I was fighting Kain?”
He looked up and shook his head. “I don’t think so.
Whatever changed did so after then. The only thing I can come up with is that the longer I’m around you, the more…
connected we are, and since I’ve already gone through the change, I can tune into those kind of things better.”
I frowned. “It makes no sense.”
“It wil .” He sighed. “When Lucian said we were two halfs made to be a whole, he wasn’t kidding. If you had hung around that night at his house, you would’ve learned some interesting things. It would make things… so much easier.”
Ah, damn. That night only made me think of one thing: Aiden. It was a struggle, but I managed to push him into the furthest corner of my mind. “What kind of things?”
Seth sat up and faced me in one fluid motion. “The gods know you are going to hate this, but oh, what the hel . The longer we are around each other, the more connected we wil become—to the point neither of us wil real y know where one begins and the other ends.”
I sat up a bit straighter. “I don’t like the sound of that.”
“Yeah… wel , me neither. But this is what’s going to go down. I know how you are with control. You’re kind of like me in that sense. I don’t like not being able to control what I’m feeling. Just like you, but it’s not going to matter. Even now, it’s already affecting me.”
“What’s affecting you?”
He seemed to struggle for the right words. “Being around you is already affecting me. I can tap into akasha easily, sensing you when you’re hurt, and even now, I can feel it.”
He paused, taking a deep breath. “It’s the power in you—
the aether. It cal s to me, and you haven’t even changed yet.
What do you think it’s going to be like when you do? When you turn eighteen?”
I didn’t know and I real y didn’t like where any of this was heading. “You know what wil happen, don’t you?”
Seth nodded again and looked away. “Once it happens, it wil be a thousand times—no, a mil ion times stronger.
What I want, you wil want. We wil share the same thoughts, needs, and desires. Supposedly, it works both ways, but I’l be stronger than you. Whatever you want may end up being skewed by what I want. I am the First, Alex. Al it takes is one touch and that power shifts to me.”
Panic reared and I failed at pushing it down. I started to rise, but Seth placed his hands on my knees. Thank the gods I was wearing jeans because if his skin touched mine and that goofy swirly crap started happening right now, I’d probably lose it.
“Alex, hear me out.”
“Hear you out? You’re saying I’l have no control over anything.” I shook my head frantical y. The wild movement stretched the tender skin on my throat, but I ignored the sting. “That can’t happen. I can’t deal with that. I don’t believe in being fated to someone—or even fate.”
“Alex, calm down. Look. I know this is probably up there with the worst things that can happen to you, but you have time.”
“What do you mean I have time?”
“None of this affects you now. You won’t want anything I want right now.” He let go of my knees and leaned back—
away from me. “But it doesn’t work that way for me. Being near you means the connection is choking the crap out of me. Like right now, your heart is racing. So is mine. Being this close to you is like… being inside your head, but you stil have time.”
Processing al of this wasn’t easy. I mean, I got what he was saying. Since he’d gone through the whole palingenesis thing, whatever it was between us was already wrapping its super-special cord around him, but not me. Not until I turned eighteen. Then? “Why didn’t Lucian tel me any of this?”
“You didn’t stick around, Alex.”
I made a face at him. “I don’t like any of this, Seth. We’re talking seven months here. In seven months, I’l be eighteen.”
“I know. Seven months of me helping you train, so try to imagine what the hel I’l be feeling this whole entire time.”
I tried, but couldn’t. “This isn’t going to work.”
He leaned forward and tucked a strand of blond hair behind his ear. “That’s what I’m thinking. I came up with an idea. Now, hear me out on this. I can deal with this for right now, because even though it’s strong, it’s not that strong.
It’s doable—for me, but after you Awaken, things wil change. If we can’t handle it—if you can’t handle it, then we’l separate. I’l leave. You won’t be able to because of school, but I can. I’l go to the other end of the earth.”
“But the Council—Lucian—he wants you here, with me.” I rol ed my eyes. “For whatever reason. He’s ordered you here.”
Seth shrugged, and then he flopped down onto his back.
“Whatever. Screw the Council. I’m the Apol yon. What the hel can Lucian do to me?”
Those were dangerous, rebel ious words. I kind of liked them. “You’d actual y do that for me?”
He turned his gaze to me, smiling slightly. “Yes. I would actual y do that. You seem surprised.”
One of my legs dropped off the side of the bed as I leaned over him. “Yes. Why would you? It sounds like everything comes up rosy for you.”
“Do you think I’m a bad person or something?” He continued to smile up at me.
I blinked, a bit taken aback. “No… I don’t think that.”
“Then why would you think I’d force this upon you? Being apart won’t stop the connection from growing stronger, but it wil stop the shifting of power. Things… wil be intense once the transfer happens. If I leave, we wil each stil be our own person.”
Out of nowhere, it struck me. “This is for you. You don’t think you’l be able to handle it.”
He only acknowledged my words with a sardonic twist to his lips.
This connection thing must actual y bother him if he real y thought he wouldn’t be able to handle it down the road.
Wrong as it may be, it kind of made me feel better about the situation. In the end, if things became too much, there was a way out. I stil had control. So did Seth.
“What are you thinking?”
Snapping out of my thoughts, I looked down at him. “The next seven months are real y going to suck for you.”
Seth tipped his head back and laughed. “Ah, I don’t know about that. This— this thing—has its benefits.”
I sat back, folding my arms. “How so?”
He smiled.
“What are you thinking?”
“That we’ve actual y held an entire conversation without insulting one another. Next thing you know, you’l actual y consider me a friend.”
“Baby steps, Seth. Baby steps.”
He turned back to staring at my ceiling. There were no stars that glowed, just ordinary old, dul white paint. Without thinking, I moved again, reaching out and touching the hand resting near my thigh. Cal it an experiment, but I wanted to see what would happen.
Seth’s head whipped in my direction. “What are you doing?”
“Nothing.” And nothing was what happened. Confused, I wrapped my fingers around his.
“Doesn’t look like nothing,” His eyes narrowed on me.
“I guess so.” Giving up on my impromptu test, I lifted my hand. “Shouldn’t you be—” Whatever I was about to say died on my lips. Incredibly fast, Seth grabbed my hand and threaded his fingers through mine.
