“It just…changed so fast. One second the world was normal and the next it was all wrong.”
“And one second people you loved were alive and the next…”
Stacey shook her head, as if to shake the bad thoughts from her mind.
“At least here we're safe, or at least as safe as it gets.”
Katie shoved her box onto the pallet behind her and exhaled slowly.
She felt winded and her face was flushed. Nearby she could hear Eric and Travis talking in low voices about the security of the back doors.
Already any window to the abandoned buildings were being bricked up. She understood the fears Travis and Juan had about the small gate built to enter the hotel holding back any large amount of zombies. Part of her thought they were overly paranoid, yet she knew in this world that no one could truly be careful enough.
Stacey glanced toward Eric and Travis as they walked by them.
The men were talking earnestly and gesturing around them. Stacey looked at Katie and Katie quirked her eyebrow upward.
“When they talk shop, I have no idea what they are saying,” Stacey confessed.
“You and me both,” Katie agreed. She wiped more sweat from her face. She was wearing gloves to prevent cutting her hands. They felt obscenely warm.
Stacey sighed and looked back at Katie. “Don't get me wrong. I'm glad Eric is involved with fort business, but sometimes I just wish…”
She let out another long sigh. “You know, sometimes I wish we could just relax, for a moment, and be glad we're with each other and safe.
But it's always about scrambling to be safer, scrambling to survive, scrambling to anticipate every little thing that could go wrong.”
“I've been thinking about that lately,” Katie confessed. “That maybe we'll never know real peace ever again. You know that feeling that the world is safe and sane. That we can get up in the morning and there will be food on the table, a job to go to, a loved one to curl up with at night. That the world humanity has created is secure.” She was thinking of Lydia and their beautiful home again. She blinked her eyes hard to fight back tears.
“I guess if that's true, then any little bit of happiness we find, we should just hold onto it.” Stacey looked toward Eric. Katie knew from what Stacey had told her that they had fallen slowly in love with each other as they struggled to survive. “I guess, maybe, just being here with him alive is enough.”
Katie found herself looking toward Travis. “Maybe,” she said at last. “Maybe.” She quickly began to fill the next box, shoving cans into neat stacks inside.
Stacey lifted her box onto the pallet behind them and reached for another box stacked nearby.
“Hey,” Travis said from behind them.
Katie turned around and looked up into his face as he leaned over them. Stacey sat back on her butt and let out a long, tired breath.
“You two have been in here long enough. Why don’t you finish up your boxes then take a break?”
Katie nodded her head. Stacey looked relieved.
“Thanks, Travis,” Stacey said and swept as much of the remaining casserole boxes into the box with one stroke of her arm. “Done!”
Travis laughed and helped her tape up the box and heave it onto the pallet. Katie quickly stacked as much of the cans as she could into her box, anxious to get out of the smelly store and take a break.
“I'll see you on the next shift,” Stacey said to Katie, and jogged out of the store into the bright sunlight.
Katie hurriedly packed her box and waited for Travis to move on.
But he didn't. He squatted down next to her and helped her pack the box. She didn't know what to say, but it felt awkward not to talk to him. She searched for words, but all the ones that felt ready to slip off her tongue where not ones she was ready to say.
“It looks like we'll be able to get this area secure by tonight,” Travis finally said. “So we can go into the hotel tomorrow or the following day.”
“It will feel good to get into it and spread out. I adore Nerit, but I need my own space,” Katie confessed.
“It is hard to find actual alone time around here, isn't it?” Travis smiled at her warmly. “But it's kinda lonely at the same time.”
She finally looked up at him and saw his hazel eyes were staring at her flushed face. “I'm sorry.” It was all she could think to say.
“I miss you,” he said. “We rarely talk.”
“I have a lot on my mind,” she answered lamely.
Travis started to say one thing, then visibly changed his mind. He closed his mouth, thought for a second, then said, “I just want to be your friend.”
“No, you don't,” Katie corrected him in a soft voice. She was painfully aware of all the people in the store, packing boxes, breaking down shelves, and cleaning up. This was not a conversation she wanted overheard and repeated around the fort. She was scandalous enough with the whispers going about that she was a lesbian.
He winced, but nodded his head in agreement. “But I can settle for being your friend.” He folded the box flaps over and reached for the tape.
Katie rested her hands on the box and leaned toward him. “I need time to think.”
“Being friends with me is not a threat to your memory of your wife,” Travis whispered.
She couldn't answer him without giving herself away, so she busied herself by grabbing the marker and writing in bold letters on the side.
She could feel Travis' gaze searching her expression for clues, seeking to understand. It made her nervous. She wanted him to walk away before he figured it out.
“Or is it?”
Her green eyes flicked upwards and she saw that he was suspicious of her silence. Maybe something in her gaze gave her away, because he took her gloved hand in his. She started to yank away, but only managed to pull her hand out of the glove. Travis caught her fingers gently in his and held her hand. He didn't seem to mind that they were sweaty.
“Katie, I'm not a threat to the memory of your wife, am I?” Travis asked in a whisper.
She could feel tears in her eyes and it was hard to speak. At last she was able to say, “Please…”
The word could mean many different things, but, surprisingly, Travis seemed to understand. “Okay.”
There was a spark of hope in his gaze now and she averted her eyes quickly. She knew she had opened up the door to her heart. It may have been just a crack, but she was terrified.
“I better go check on how things are going,” Travis said finally. He let go of her hand. He pulled out a bag of M & Ms from his shirt pocket and handed it to her. “It's a bit mushy still. I have a feeling there will be a run on the chocolate soon, so have this.”
Katie couldn't help but smile despite herself. “Giving me chocolates now, huh?”
“I'm just a romantic kinda guy.” He winked.
Her gaze followed him as he walked away. She looked down at the bag of candy and allowed herself a small smile.
3. Safety In Twos
Juan handed Jenni the bag of Doritos. Seated on the wall, side by side, they could see the final shift mopping the floor of the Dollar Store. Night had come and the air was cool as it ruffled their hair and dried the sweat on their tanned limbs.
“Are we really ready?” Jenni yanked the top of the bag open and pulled a chip out. The smell was amazing and she breathed it in deeply.
“Yep. Eric gave the okay on the bricked up windows and the reinforced doors. And it doesn't smell so much like zombie in there anymore,” Juan said, and grinned.
“Yum. The smell of Doritos is so much better.” Jenni pulled a chip out and munched it down with relish.
Juan laughed and shook his head. “Ah, the simple things in life.”
“Are we going in tomorrow morning?” Jenni looked over her shoulder at the dark countenance of the hotel. “Or what?”
“Travis is going to make the call after inspecting the new area one more time. He's really nervous about all this. He hates the idea of putting anyone at risk. He even put himself on one of the teams to go into the hotel.”
“Travis hates guns,” Jenni said in disbelief.
“Yeah, but he's doing that whole thing where the leader won't ask his people to do what he won't do.” Juan shrugged. “Since I've known him he's been like that. He is annoyingly good at times.”
“Not a bad boy like you, huh?” Jenni elbowed her boyfriend and stuffed another chip in her mouth.
Juan pulled off his cowboy hat and smoothed out his hair with one hand. “Yeah, he can't stand up to my cool factor.”
With a smirk, Jenni leaned her head on his shoulder and continued to watch as the last crew mopped the floors inside. One of the women, a red head named Katarina, stood watch at the sentry post nearby.
Jenni didn't know her too well, but knew she was a good shot. As more people came into the fort, the dynamic was changing. It wasn't just the townies anymore that made up the fort's population. People from other towns had joined them. Each new person contributed in some way where it benefited everyone. Jenni thought it was good to have diversity.