"You're right," I answered. I watched myself in the window's reflection.
"It's time we put Christ in Christmas," mother preached from her hospital bed. "No more materialism. No more forgetting the real meaning of Christmas." She summoned me to her side. Placing her IV laden arm around me she continued. "We lost a baby, as hard as it is for us to understand, God is using us. It's God's will, I know it; I feel it. It's his reminder that we still have each other. We may have our disagreements, but we have each other. We should thank God for that. Really thank him."
Oh shit, my lips quivered. I can kiss the Nintendo goodbye. Damn it, what did I do to deserve this?
"Just go with it," Shannie told me over the phone. "She's been traumatized. You and God are the only ones she can trust. Look on the bright side, you're in good company."
Good company would be to live with you and Diane I thought. If I can't live with them at least I can live next to them. Sanity was a bedroom's window view away.
The first Saturday after mother came home she reminded us not to wonder too far, confession was that evening and she expected dad and I to celebrate the sacrament with her. "Since when is confession a celebration?" I asked my father. He shrugged.
"What do I have to confess about?" I questioned Shannie as images of Diane flooded my mind. I felt my face warm.
"Whatever making you blush." Shannie teased.
"I'm not blushing."
"You are to."
"Am not."
"Geezus Pete. You're impossible."
"I think it would be cool to confess," Shannie continued.
"You would say that."
"Absolving yourself. It's like starting with a clean slate halfway through the game."
"Easy for you to say you never had to do it. It sucks and it's creepy. You sit in that little dark closet and tell the priest your darkest thoughts. If that isn't bad enough the whole things suppose to be private, but do you mean to tell me he doesn't recognize our voices. It's bullshit No wonder our priest always wears a shit eating grin."
"Like he cares about your erectile dysfunctions," Shannie quipped. My face burned. "I think its cool and I'd like to try it."
"Convert."
She stuck out her tongue at me. I returned the favor.